How would you rather live your life, gas or constipation

Reminds me of when I did the Food Ave department at Target A few years ago. I was the only person working there, so sometimes I'd eat all the lactose ridden food I wanted and release all the farts in the backroom of Food Ave. (The food was my food, not Target's)

I remember once after closing up for the day the managers actually stopped by the department to check if everything was clean. The serving area was clean and the machines were too. The second they went to the backroom area they thought there was a gas leak. Everything was clean there so the smell confused them even more.

So, yeah, I guess I'll take gas. I'll just release it all in an area the bosses don't pay attention to. Also constipation makes me physically ill. XD

Activated charcoal-lined underwear = problem solved.

Headaches...
versus an uncomfortable anus and the inability for any non-weirdos to be around you for very long.

It's not a real question. Headaches trump everything. There isn't even the small chance of anyone being aroused by one, they just suck.

I work in a barn, nobody knows when I fart
Also I have absolutely zero tolerance for headaches, I fold immediately

I voted for gas, because I don't like sitting in the toilet for hard stools.

Gas + waitering at a high-end restaurant

My family has kind of an immature sense of humor. They'll chase you around and fart on you (my mom has done this to me). So the farting thing may just give me an advantage in this battle lol