How would you react to a transgender in the public toilets?

56 Comments

I am having a personal dilemma.
I am transgender, and am having trouble with public toilets. I never know which one I can use.

I mean, what the hell am I supposed to do? Mentally I fit into one, physically I fit into the other. Choosing the one I should be able to use makes me feel like a liar, a pervert, and a criminal, and the other one is disgusting, and embarrassing for me. It terrifies me.

I haven`t had any treatment surgical or hormonal, so I`m still very much my un-preferred gender.

How would you react if you knew someone who was technically the other gender, but wanting to be the same one as you, was using the public restroom with you?

If you could explain your choice, that would be very helpful, thank you very much.

Male - I see no problem, I`d be completely comfortable. 64
Male - I would be a bit iffy, but wouldn`t bother them. 29
Male - I`d be disgusted, and have to have them leave. 9
Female - I see no problem, I`d be completely comfortable. 45
Female - I would be a bit iffy, but wouldn`t bother them. 25
Female - I`d be disgusted, and have to have them leave. 4
Male - Other, please comment. 4
Female - Other, please comment. 5
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Comments ( 56 )
  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    I'd say, "Hey I'm out of toilet paper could you pass me some?"

    (That's my way of saying I'm completely comfortable with it. ;D)

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  • dappled
    11 years ago

    I know someone who has been through this. Prior to surgery she had a male body and used the male toilets. After surgery, the idea was that she would use the female toilets. This caused problems. Some women didn't want her using the female toilets so she stuck with the male toilets despite, outwardly, being female. The men cared less about this kind of stuff.

    Over a couple of years, the position changed and she always uses the women's toilets now. I think it took time for people to accept. What's strange is that the men cared less despite the men being the ones with their bits on display. Women's toilets are all private.

    Anyway, for me personally, if I saw someone who looked female using the same toilets as me, I'd assume she was just a feminine looking male and wouldn't really be bothered.

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  • RainbowFlash
    9 years ago

    I guess it depends on how you outwardly appear.

    Most people go to the toilet for one thing and don't care what you are doing in there. They want to do their business and leave.

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  • RIPMitchXx
    10 years ago

    I'm a transguy (I dont know if you are, but if you are), and if I saw you in the mens room too I'd spark up a conversation if i noticed anybody was giving you a hard time. Same vice versa if it was in the womans room.

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  • jess714
    11 years ago

    I just don't care where someone pees for god sake get over yourselves

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  • capcrunch6
    11 years ago

    Use one of those "family" bathrooms.

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  • awkwardsauce
    11 years ago

    I'd be completely okay with it. Why not?

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  • cdawg
    11 years ago

    i have to say just dont worry about it
    if youre in the mens bathroom they will think ur a girl and not care if ur in the girls bathroom they will think ur a GIRL and not CARE relax

    but im very confused as to what gender you are mentaly compared to physically lolol cuz physically u look like a girl right and mentaly ur a boy :Sor?
    anyway
    you dont have any higher chance of being raped or killed
    depending on wich room u use

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  • Terence_the_viking
    11 years ago

    go to the disable toilet.

    you're welcome

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

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  • [email protected]
    11 years ago

    Iwould just shit/piss on in the damn street already,fuck what anyone would think.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    I'm male so seeing a female pretending to be a man in the toilets would make me laugh so hard i wouldn't make it without pissing myself. So due to my wet pants i'd have to say i'd find it displeasing.

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    • Zonfire80
      2 years ago

      So if a transman man followed your daughter in the woman’s bathroom would you be laughing then? 😂

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  • myownopinions
    11 years ago

    I am female.

    Your question was that if I knew you were transgender, then I would be completely fine with you using the female restrooms. If I didn't know, and a male walked into the bathrooms, I honestly would be a little weirded out, but it wouldn't really bug me since we all have separate stalls anyways.

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  • Dazzle
    11 years ago

    Well, it all depends on what the person looks like.
    As a guy, I suppose it'd be a girl-looking person in the guy's bathrooms. Now:
    -if he looks too much like a girl, I'd wonder "What the fuck" and use a stall to pee, but other than that, I wouldn't really care.
    -If he looks like a guy with a 5 o'clock beard, a dress and a wig, I think I'd freak out a bit and avoid him but wouldn't bother the person either. Or maybe I'd walk up to him and ask him questions about his life choices, dunno my reaction.
    I don't really know, but I know I would never force him out of the bathroom, it's as much his as mine -it's public!- though I would be against him using the girls one: Why him and not me! :D

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    Personally, I think if you are, say, homosexual, you should be allowed to use the female restroom. Not because of gay rights, but because of heterosexual rights. I don't think it's right that heterosexual people have to share the bathroom with people that find you sexually attractive, the same goes for lesbians.

    I think there should be a new bathroom type for such people, to be honest. It makes everyone uncomfortable, not just the people not sure what one to use.

    Unless you are just dressing like the other gender, yet are still heterosexual, then use the restroom that fits your physical body.

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    • ETCR
      11 years ago

      That's stupid on so many levels. So straight people shouldn't have to use the same bathrooms as gay people who might be attracted to them, but gay people should have to deal with sharing a bathroom with people who may find them attractive?

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    • NeuroNeptunian
      11 years ago

      I am confused by your statement.

      Are you saying that I shouldn't be using the females restroom because somehow, my sexuality violates their rights?

      I have never had a problem regarding using the females restrooms or changing rooms. I don't check out other females in such areas. That is incredibly rude.

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      • [Old Memory]
        11 years ago

        What I am saying is that there should be a separate restroom for those people because it works for the homosexual, bisexual, etc, and it works for the heterosexual. Isn't that the whole reason men and women have different bathrooms? So they don't feel uncomfortable?

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        • NeuroNeptunian
          11 years ago

          You mean for US people.

          I'm sorry, but having to go to a neutral restroom as opposed to a women's restroom which I have been going to my whole life without a problem just because a few women would feel uncomfortable at the thought of a woman who has had sexual attractions to women trying to take a piss in the stall next to them isn't very comforting to me.

          I will not deny that there is a comfort issue involved, but once again, I have never had to face issues with women as far as my sexuality goes whilst I am trying to take a leak. It is not like something that I have to sign in at the front door and I fail to see your basis for my having to be separated from other women. Are you trying to say that homosexuals take the opportunity of restroom usage to check out other males/females? Is that what you are trying to say about me?

          Regardless, I would rather use the restroom and change in front of other females than in front of other males, regardless of whether they would check me out or not, and I don't feel that someone's comfort issue should compromise me from doing what I have been successfully doing my whole life: shitting in a woman's restroom without causing a problem.

          Unless you're suggesting that the minority should give in to the wills and comforts of the majority, a stance that I have never known you to have until now.

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          • WordWizard
            11 years ago

            Coed bathrooms are fun? Every house technically has a coed bathroom. Also why can they not have a regular and a coed bathroom? That is what they do in the place I live?

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            • NeuroNeptunian
              11 years ago

              Nothing wrong with co-ed bathrooms, but he is talking about a bathroom specifically for homosexuals/bisexuals etc.

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    • yournotalone
      9 years ago

      Public restrooms should never become dangerous places. As a man, I feel little threat from a woman or transgender person in a closed room. If I were a woman, perhaps Id feel different.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      I am homosexual.
      There are some places where there is a 3rd option, but it seems very exclusive to America or specific places that cater to trans people, which I do not live in unfortunately.

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      • [Old Memory]
        11 years ago

        That is a shame. We should be trying to cater to those that are homosexual, it helps everyone in the process.

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        • Bigdaddy_
          9 years ago

          See, that's the problem. You don't want to be treated as a "minority" yet you wish to be "catered" to. Why should anyone have to cater to you just because you have a different lifestyle choice?? I believe it's more of a cry for attention.

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  • NobodyKnows
    7 years ago

    What stops people from using the "wrong" bathroom already?

    I don't care all too much, and I'm sick of hearing people bitch about this issue online (on both sides of the debate).

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  • Drawingmud
    9 years ago

    Go outside? Go in the woods or use a porta potty

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  • yournotalone
    9 years ago

    Lets just get away from bricks and mortar toilet facilities. We are all confined, leashed, to the next available public restroom. And for the transgenders amongst us we are prone to have no welcome public toilet facility at all. Check out what the folks at Gotta Go Poncho are doing. They offer everybody their "own personal restroom", as an opaque hooded poncho and accompanying pee and poop bags. This is pretty bold admittedly but I credit them to thinking outside the box, or in this case the walled bathroom.

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  • mightymouse
    11 years ago

    RATIONAL PEOPLE

    Rational people would not mind WHO entered WHAT toilet providing they acted appropriately and had a valid reason to be there.

    I'm a guy, and if a girl OR guy OR LGBT were to be there to:

    1. "check me out"
    2. take photos
    3. steal something
    4. rob someone
    5. have sex in a cubical
    6. try and sell me something
    7. take drugs
    8. be inappropriate in some other way..

    then sure.. I'll be uncomfortable with it....

    Otherwise... it wouldn't bother me at all WHO was there...

    --------------------
    | mightymouse |
    --------------------

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  • WordWizard
    11 years ago

    What is a transgender toilet? You know they have Coed bathrooms right? Why not just go to one of those? For Pete sake the only difference between a men’s and a women’s bathroom is one has urinals and even in the boys they have stalls for you to poop in. women has only stalls.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      Coed bathrooms where?
      I have never seen a single one here in Britain. And the difference in he toilets maybe small, but people are used to their privacy.

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      • WordWizard
        11 years ago

        Well they have them in our malls. They started making them because adult parents did not always want to leave the kid alone so dragged them into whatever bathroom they are going to.

        So like a mom will drag her baby boy into girls room or go into the boys room to make her boy safe. Some cases a dad took his little girl into men’s room or himself go into girls room to keep his daughter safe.

        In these coed bathrooms they have a circle with a line down the middle and boy on one half and boy logo on other half. Maybe you should ask the city to make some. It makes it easier for parents too.

        In act when adults do this with a child people do not actually pay any note since they figure they are protecting a child. So this kind of thing happens a lot.

        I will suggest if you do not have it in the place you live that you do talk to the city. It will not just be helping people and people like you but parents as well.

        If you want to know what a coed bathroom looks like it is just like the females bathroom except it is much bigger. It only has stalls so you do not have to pee in public.

        I personally like going in and out of the coed bathroom just because I feel I can try something new. I would feel embarrassed if I tried going into the bathroom that was not my gender.

        When I first discovered coed bathrooms I would go to the bathrooms and run back and force between my sexes bathroom and coed restroom. I was 11 when they did this and they do it in most malls and big stores like Wal-Mart.

        My mother would at this point drag me out and pull me back to the bathroom she was in and tell me to stop goofing around.

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        • ETCR
          11 years ago

          Here people just take their kid to their own bathrooms...

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  • NeuroNeptunian
    11 years ago

    I generally don't even pay attention to others when I use the restroom.

    What would make me uncomfortable is if they are watching me.

    If not, I generally don't give a shit. Pun intended.

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  • KrunkFu
    11 years ago

    Usually I'd never say this.. But this is a very DUMB question. If you look like a guy, go into the men's, if you look like a girl, go into the women's... How is that a dilemma?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      Because you get screamed at for going into one, and beat up for going in the other. If you don`t understand, then don`t come here. It`s actually a seriously sensitive issue.

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  • OswaldCobblepot
    11 years ago

    Idgaaaaaf.

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  • Shackleford96
    11 years ago

    Let's see... I don't exactly know the terminology very well, but I'll try.

    I am a male.

    If a female who was a trans-gender male was using the same bathroom as me, it would probably make me uncomfortable.

    On the other hand, I could see a male who was a trans-gendered female getting a LOT of hate and offending a LOT of ladies for being in the opposite situation.

    I have no idea what to suggest really though. Ladies are more sensitive about their privacy, so your best bet is probably using the males bathroom.

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    • Zonfire80
      2 years ago

      I still use the women’s even though I’m on t. I use to go with my wife all the time. I just don’t feel comfortable using the men’s. The Women’s bathroom is a much more safer option. Plus when I pee I can use my stp packer to pee without anyone seeing.

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  • misca
    11 years ago

    I see no problem.

    Oh, and I'm male.

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  • sajalsharma456
    11 years ago

    people have right to take a piss.. why would I be bothered of that...??

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago

    I think it would be fun seeing how they use the urinal.

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    • Zonfire80
      2 years ago

      I think it would be funny too and I’m ftm transgender 😂

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  • We.Need3.Eugenics
    11 years ago

    QUEERS! They are males!

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