I’m afraid i’m the “other”

43% Normal
7 Comments

Me and my friend are more friend with benefits. We promised no feelings but guess what I’ve caught feelings. I tell him daily how much he means to me and how happy I am to have him in my life. I buy him things to show his appreciation cause I feel he has no idea. But now we work together and he walks outside and makes phone calls almost every shift we work, but won’t take the call anywhere around me. So how do I ask him? What do I say? Or do I just start to distance myself? We both agreed to the friends with no feelings, but now I think that was a mistake. It’s already hard enough working with him

Voting Results
43% Normal
Based on 7 votes (3 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 7 )
  • olderdude-xx
    2 years ago

    As I see it; part of being "Friends with benefits" is that each party is totally free to be in another more meaningful relationship. Your just convenient sexually available for each other within your friendship.

    It may not involve cheating as long as the other person is told up front that there is a "friends with benefits" relationship on the side.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
  • Ummitsstillme
    2 years ago

    It is really difficult to maintain fwb, if you are good friends and/or spend a lot of time together.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • Hide
    2 years ago

    I'm personally not a big fan of 'friends with benefits', but I believe it can be mutually beneficial, especially nowadays where the bar is lowered for 'normal relationships'. As for your feelings: Don't cling to them through your common sense. Don't fool yourself thinking that giving him gifts will make him automatically like you, but instead be there for him like you would normally. Also, I personally believe, you may be able to make this work between you two, but you should definitely discuss this with him.
    Start with proposing the idea of a date; that's something most people can ease into, and it shows your intentions with him. Of course, if he denies you can always confirm his feelings by asking something along the lines of "You don't like me in THAT way at all?".
    If he does accept, then make it a regular thing, and propose the idea of changing this into a proper relationship. Know that it might be a scary change, for both of you, but that's it's close to the only way to tell for sure what he is feeling for you.
    I'll be honest, I think if he reciprocates your feelings, even then you should stick to your common sense most of all, in terms of investment.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • Curiouskitten444
    2 years ago

    Its probably time to go back to just friends if you have feelings as to preserve the friendship

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
  • 1234tellmethatyoulovememore
    2 years ago

    He's not the one.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0
      -
    • 1234tellmethatyoulovememore
      2 years ago

      This sounds like a situation where you will get hurt in the end

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
  • 1WeirdGuy
    2 years ago

    Its probably never gonna work unfortunately if he made you promise you wont get any feelings

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    -1
    -1