I always anticipate seeing a roach when going into a bathroom

The kitchen used to be infested with roaches when me and my family first moved into this house about 5 years ago. That somewhat made me fear roaches less in a way due to the many times I've encountered them. We eventually got an exterminator and our kitchen was rid of them.

Now, every once in a while we see a roach in the house which would be most probably originating from outside.

now fast forward to a few months ago, i had seen this huge roach on the wall in the bathroom and our bathroom isn't of size, i tried to kill it but it somehow crawled into the door frame, i kicked the door frame thinking it squashed the motherfucker to death but it didn't apparently, because i went to the bathroom again that day and it was standing on the door frame about 6 inches away from my face, thank god it didn't jump onto me or i would've needed therapy. I managed to kill it thankfully.

Ever since that day, I've become very cautious of whenever i enter a bathroom, turning on the lights first and looking everywhere making sure the coast is clear.

Now it was only yesterday when i did my usual check up, i went to hang my clothes on the door to take a shower when i saw another huge roach crawling away on the wall behind the door with its disgusting hairy legs clicking loudly as it moves its diseased body trying to run away. I broke the sweeper we had in the bathroom trying to kill it but at least i managed to kill it. Yet now that made me double cautious and anxious every time i enter a bathroom.

It's not that i fear the roach itself although it's disgusting, it's the anxiety of the surprise appearance it makes, especially when close to you.