I am a 30 year old virgin

dont worry man i know a few guys that are in there late 20's and still virgins. i'm 26 and i've only had sex with one girl. she was my g/f for about 3 years. the whole thing was a freak accident. i just got drunk one night and she put the moves on me. we ended up dating after that. however, we broke up like 2 years ago and its been back to same routine. i just don't have the balls to ask a girl out. its definitely a confidence thing. plus i'm totally retarded around girls. so if it makes you feel better you're not the only one. i guess the only thing people like us can do to is just go for it and say fuck it. shit i should take my own advice.

The bright side: Yes... Cause there is a bright side to being a 30 yo virgin... Here comes objectivity. Most couples nowadays are a real joke. They are hasty to get their relationships to the next level, a level they will never reach cause they are missing the real point: Are we really made for each other... When the obvious no appears in front of their eyes with the fact that and all they had in common to begin with was a sexual urge, they leave each other and on to the next mismatch, quick because if i'm a certain age and still single, I'll be an alien, plus, I don't wanna die alone! What about us? Do we know loneliness? I think we do... thus we're independant, a good point if you ask most people. But mostly: Do we know loneliness enough to value that cherished person more than anything once we find her? Will that knowledge be deep enough to motivate us not to cheat or lie to her? Will we remember it enough to resist the desire of going to someone else the minute anything goes wrong? Or will we tell to ourselves "I don't care about that bitch, there's a million fish in the sea!" like most people? I'll let you guess what I think. We have a problem with making the move, but those 30 years of loneliness will probably be an asset once it is made... cause not many people will agree with that, but being a virgin for such a long time is also a sexual experience... an experience of self centering and introspection that many serial daters do not have... In fact, what do we lack? We never put our penises in a vagina and that's all there is to it! We have to wait for a girl that puts good guy above good lover... when you say it that way, it cannot be that rare. As for looks, I won't assume that you're fat just because you weigh 290 pounds like a lot of people did... I guess if you're muscular that's a point for you... If not though, you should do something about it... Not for getting a girl... for the pride of saying to yourself: Yeah! I made it to 230! I once thought it was sad, but looks are VERY important... Everybody has standards, and it's not about looking like Arnold but about being appealing to the person you love... As much as you cannot take sexual desire as the whole basis of a relationship, a couple cannot exist without it, and while there are people with some might say weird standards, it is still a fact that not many people like fat...
I hope this helped you a little, even if i'll admit that this post was much more about me than it was about you, hope you find something useful in it.

I can really relate to your situation. I'm 32, and a virgin too.

I know exactly how you feel about talking to women. Reading your story makes me feel like I'm not the only one.

If it makes you feel any better, I'm jealous that you have kissed a girl... I never have.

I think that if you don't rush it, wait for the right person, you'll be glad you waited.

I dont think theres something wrong with this. Life is about finding love, not about having sex with total strangers.

whatever you do...when you meet a girl and you 2 dont know each other...dont be afraid to be yourself.. Be 100%% honest and just "be yourself" if you two dont like each other..you dont ever have to talk again.. but at least you were completely honest. as opposed to if you made up a peachy story hoping that she would like you better if you had a more interesting life...b/c later on down the road if you two get together on lies.. its not gonna work out b/c either you are gonna have to continue lying to her til the end about these things..or eventually tell her the truth and its gonna hurt her and possibly ruin the relationship.. there is someone out there for you. All you have to do is go about it right. and im EXTREMELY proud of you for still bein a virgin. It shows you have character. And you will respect yourself even more when you finally lose it to the "right" girl. So keep it up and dont give up. and be confident with who you are. Just because the majority of the world is stuck up bitches...doesnt mean they all are ;). you will find someone who wants you for your personality more than anything.. And those are the best relationships.

Get it sorted out. The longer you leave it the more difficult it'll be. You really don't want to live your entire life without knowing the beauty of sex, do you?

your story made me cry...(sad tunes playin in the background)...

hey dont worry about it, really. this society makes it seem like we need to have sex to be accepted, but just ignore all of those people suggesting that you should go to vegas or whatever. just wait for the right girl. and your definately not running out of time. i know this guy who never got married till he was 50 and he is so happy with his wife and family. just work on getting some self confidence and everything else will fall into place.

I doubt your looks are the problem. Most girls go for personality (or social status aka money). It sounds like you feel very self conscious when you talk to women, and they can sense that. If you feel good about yourself, you are far more likely to attract a woman. My suggestion is to join a group of some kind - perhaps a volunteer organization or a club of some kind where you can meet other people who share your interests. That will help you socialize better and make friends. And even if you don't meet the right woman through the group, you'll have the skills you need to do so in another setting.

YOU DONT HAVE TO HAVE SEX!!ITS NOT A WRITTEN RULE THAT SAYS YOU HAVE TO HAVE SEX!!! I HAD SEX WHEN I WAS 21 AND MOST PEOPLE THINK THATS OLD WHEN THEVE STARTED AT 13 AND 14, BUT THINK ABOUT ALL OF THE BAD SEX THAT I MISSED OVER THOSE 8 YEARS, AND ALL OF THE GIRLS WITH STDS THAT I DINT HAVE SEX WITH TOO.......BE FREE WITH YOUR SEXUALITY, AND TRUST ME, BE HONEST YOUD BE SURPRISE TO FIND A FREAKY GIRL THAT WOULD LOVE TO SHOW YOU HOW ITS DONE!!

I voted that it was not normal but only cause your already 30 years old. Im 23 years old and I still havent found the girl I want to be with so I dont think theres anything wrong with the not having sex part. Did you grow up with a father or atleast somebody that could show you some pointers and guidence? If your not getting anywhere because you dont have the confidence too. I recommend to go and workout at a gym and if your masturbating, too stop. the gym is perfect to looking and FEELING great. You have no idea. workibg out is like the best drug anybody can ever invent for you. Infact its so good, it should be illegall, hahaha. In my experience, im more CALM, more energetic, and I think less about saying something. In other words, im not self consious, but instead im actually more TALKATIVE. I highly recommend this for you. trust me, your never going to have a situation where you dont know what to say when your talking to a woman, its just going to come to you naturally. Also I would highly recomend to stop masturbating because it seems to make you less agresive when your next to a woman. You see, what attracts a woman to a man is a man who takes the lead and makes his moves. but If you lost your appepite for a woman becase you masterbated the night before, then your not going to be that willing to chase the woman you want, and infact will more likely want the woman to make a move on you.

Wow. Some people are really insensitive, and I bet they wouldn't appreciate it if you answered some of their questions in the derogatory way that they've answered yours. Others, though, have got the idea. Are you a christian? Do you believe in saving sex for the confines of marriage? I'm an 18 year old virgin (girl), surrounded by a generation of people who are, well... going at it like rabbits. I, like you, think about sex, and (maybe not like you) wonder if my religion will affect my chances of being in a relationship. People have said I am attractive, I am a little overweight, but in proportion, (with quite large assets if you know what I mean haha) but just haven't had a relationship! I'm proud to be someone who has enough self-control to save myself. Believe me, there are a lot of women out there who will respect you for not losing it meaninglessly. Hope I've helped :)

ok i had sex with a virgin and we had great sex the second time. he didn't tell me he was a virgin until later.
he was 25 and good looking. he was sort of a sheltered shy rich kid. being a virgin made him sweeter and more in love with me.
he was emotionally immature though so i had to ditch him.
i think prostitution is fine (legal in nevada). practice makes perfect. but hiv kills.

i am a 31 year old virgin myself, i know how difficult it is.
i too wish i didn't have any problems and could find someone right for me.

Sorry but you lack initiative and confidence on a lot of different fronts and that is why you're a lonely virgin, unhappy & companionless guy - not just at the moment - but all the way through to age 30.

You've "never even tried" -well how's that working for you? You feel "pervy" and "uncomfortable" - what are you, a prude?

I agree with most of the posters here - get off your butt and DO something - almost anything. Here's a tip - you pretty much can't fail any worse than you are now.

Dude, if you're a white guy, head on over to someplace like japan or thailand. You can be confident that whatever the hell you say will be greeted with open arms. Most of what you say they won't understand, but your being white will make it oh so interesting. And if you have no confidence at all, you can have confidence in that.

White nerds and asian girls go together like locker rooms & funk, and the reason ain't that these guys are smooth or confident or rich or handsome. Try it, you'll see.

Well let me tell you. I'm the guy and I'm sure I'm not alone when I say this I'm not attracted to beautiful women I'm attracted to unique women and women with a sort of crazy or gipsy like attitude. Its not what on the outside its what on the inside. Be proud of who you are and you feel find your soul mate when you least expected. It took me 3 marriages to find mine and now I am happy. I also don't know how to ask a girl out and if I do what to say on the date, luckily my wife and I are the same so it was easy we met and there was no acting just be ourselves and it was strange and easy. I knew she was the one the first time we met. So don't worry she is waiting for you out there and you will find her one day.

And now to suite myself...
To all those who suggested the prostitute approach: Not such a bad Idea, depending on what the person wants... But since it is an easy way that anyone can use at anytime, I take it that he concluded, as i did, that this wouldn't solve anything cause the problem is deeper than the plain fact of not having exchanged body fluids... Go to a prostitute... I bet HE didn't think about that! Surely you've helped him a lot!

And to all those who gave destructive comments like indie_bbw, You're the abnormal ones, hurting a guy who did nothing to you while you have absolutely no interests in doing so, just for the fun of... ... ... I don't get where the fun is... if you do I guess you must feel loved by everyone... try thinking some time... The donkey shit swallowing sluts are not the only ones found on the internet... i guess

Hi, well you might die alone if you don't do something about it. I'm guessing from your post that you are around women, so whats the problem? If you are waiting until your comfortable around a girl to ask her out you may die a virgin! I don't mean to sound crule but grow a pair and ask a girl out. If she goes out with you for Gods sake don't tell her everything that you posted here. Good luck let us know how it turns out.

Hmmmm and I thought I was a rare one. Hi I'm Azeem. I'm 30 and I'm also a virgin. Sad, I know. But I can't really do anything outside of wedlock. It's partly due to religious reasons (I'm a Moslem) so I can't just up and get laid with a stranger. But well, waiting for that special someone. I didn't have a gf for the same reason. If I can't marry her (I would always think), gotta just steer clear. I might die alone... but well, won't be the first time in history yo. Besides, I ain't no Rockfeller leaving behind treasures or legacies for no rightful heirs. Anyhow, thread opener: I feel for you man. Like, literally. I know where your coming from. Let's see how it goes.

Hey, welcome to the club! I am a 42-year-old virgin ( http://www.youtube.com/user/malestrom1000 ) and I know EXACTLY how you feel. Don't worry man, just keep looking. Even if you still can't find (the right) one and decide to give up, you can always go to Real Doll ( http://www.RealDoll.com ), order one and have "her" custom made to fit most of your specifications and everything - like the way I am going to do! I wish you the best and Happy New Year, my friend!

Don't worry! my aunt is 36 and she's still a virgin

Don't worry it's okay I know loads of people with the same problem but were I live women love virgins , haha , you will find the right one soon wish you best of luck :)

well..you guys should be happy, I am 39 and still a virgin :( Hope one day I will meet my dream girl! or at-least any girl

Hey, Its perfectly fine to be a virgin, to have not kissed anyone or been in a relationship. As you can tell from my name i am aSexual, i have no sex drive at all, totally not interested, my body doesnt make the hormones, there are a very small percent of people who are 'aSexual' im one of them! :)

Im 17 and it doesnt bother me one bit, if you find the right person who understands and loves you for who you are they shouldnt need sex. I agree with above comments, all people want out of relationships these days is sex, its ridiculous really. Youre fine just as you are and you should be proud of it!!

I'm 27 never had a girlfriend never had sex and never even kissed a girl or been kissed by a girl. I don't know what the real problem is with me maybe a combination of issues. I was shy all my life and was never good at making friends cause I had problems talking to people. I don't think I'm ugly but I do worry that I'm not attractive enough to get a girl interested, and me being on disability makes it even worse. Ive been on dating sites for a few years and never had good luck with it. I get badly depressed about this issue and I'm worrying every day and night about the possibility of being alone for the rest of my life. :(

You are like only one of them. There are others out there too who are 30 and havent had any girlfriends! Your tme will come, but you have to work for it. Just try to be more social and less awkward and maybe you feel pervy when you talk to a girl, but I guess you just have to get used to contact with girls.. I think you should show some initiative and GO for it. or else you might die alone.. you wont want that, so just DO it. Go out more, try to have more social contacts that will help I guess.

Sweetie,I don't think you should listen to these people...actually I KNOW,Most girls aren't sexual,and that's good you're not sexual,you wont die alone..I promise you that,so keep having chances in life,you'll get heart broken,and you'll find someone new,but it's life. Live it up,and get use to it, ^^

Before anything else, i'd like to say that everything I state in this post is based on my own feelings/experiences, from a guy who recently stopped complaining about being alone while not having the guts to date anyone. 32 and still no sex either... now is that normal... Before we answer that, we should ask ourselves wtf is normal and can we really use such a qualificative to describe human beings... Pedophiles... they've had sex... I guess they're normal... what about a girl swallowing a liter of horse spunk... She's definitely normal: Had sex. Or scathology... it's sex (or is it?) so shouldn't we consider this normal... F$$/"/ YEAH... Those were just a few demented things that we humans do (and that's just about sex)If you gave the ability to any creature on earth to reason and voice his thoughts, he'd probably tell about what a bunch of f%?%&& ups we are compared to everything else... So to me... no, you're not normal, none of us are definable by such an arbitrary concept... But that's far from the point isn't it... this is about the pain of loneliness... I share this... In that regard, by human standards, I guess we're pretty normal. The fear of dying alone, as a bunch of other fears, is something that everybody has... some might not know loneliness enough to notice though...(or just they're being plain dumb) Now the question is "Do you wish to let that fear define you?" Cause if you do you're finished... and when I say finished I mean it will deteriorate your relationships with both guys and girls to the point of nothingness, cause if in your own eyes you're nothing more than a 30-something years old virgin, that's all you're gonna be able to show, thus repelling any woman in a 60 foot radius and always feeling diminished compared to other men... a life ruining experience I tell you. This is probably where the poor self-esteem issue mentioned a lot of times above comes from. The first step to self esteem is knowing yourself... being aware of what you want to show the world about you, and of what you prefer to keep to a select few or yourself. Who am I could seem like a stupid question, but in modern society, there's a lot of interference preventing us from answering it properly.... Do you really want a partner for life... or just blank sex, or none of the above cause I'm not quite there yet on what I want but with all the sex everywhere in our faces and the modern life entirely thought out for couples I guess I should have some just to fit in. (that's the case for most people, good for you you're seemingly not dumb/horny enough to jump in the infinite torrent of shitty relationships)

My roommate is 27 and she's a virgin. In fact, she is like the female version of you... completely. Maybe y'all should talk.

I'm 20, and also still a virgin. I must do something now. Anyways.... Goodluck on finding the right one, I'm sure you'll find her.

Make friends and hang out with them, and then their friends. Youll find the person eventually. And you dont have to open up right away. You'll meet somebody who you feel comfortable talking to and all will be fine.

dont worry if your nice and respectful to girls then you'l find someone. remember most girls dont like asking guys out so if theres a girl you like, compliment her and just go for it! im sure you wont die alone, theres someone out there waiting for you.

maybe you should try to find a girl who had never been out on a date and is close to your age. if you like some one ask them out, its worth a try either way.

So what are u saying??? that fat men are ugly???? give me a brake you probably have shallow parents so thats why u think that way.

become a wedding photographer!

it only means u know how to control ur self.. nice man!

Ask yourself honestly why you haven't had a sexual relationship. Are you a workaholic/shy/etc?

The fact that you described your physical appearance but not your personality says a lot. Focus on developing yourself from the inside out. Work on your people skills, stop being complacent if you are, spot your communication weaknesses and work on them.

Get over your fear of dying alone. We can smell desperation from a mile away and it's a big turn off.

If you want to have someone to share your life with your going to have to take the plunge and start asking girls out. Try asking them out for dinner and then just chat to them about anything, you will soon realise that its not all that difficult,yes you will get a few rejectios along the way but what guy hasn't i've had loads but then i've had a lot of successful dates too.
The trick is to not let it get to you if your rejected its their loss not yours and if you get a date don't come on to strong like your expecting anything other than a nice meal and good company.Get a book on body language it will help you gauge how your doing and wether its worth asking a particular girl at all (never ask a girl out who folds her arms in front of herself when your talking to her) that's a sure sign she's not interested in you, look to see if her stance is relaxed.

statisically speaking if you just walked up to 1000 women and asked them for a fuck at least one would say yes so asking them out for dinner on you has got to have a much mcuh higher success rate.

Holy crap :( I'm 18 and I'm shy talking with chicks cause most of them are bitches & rather go with the dam potheads any way what I did was played online social games I met a few women that changed me by that I mean made me talk more

You really should be trying harder and try to gain some confidence first of all. But don't let this drag down your self-esteem. Remember this; comparing how many girlfriends or how much sex with other men is a bit like comparing the size of your muscles/penis: it may make you envious or insecure or both, but it's hardly the true measure of a man...

homie you cant weigh 290 pounds and expect to be picking up hoes.
hit a spin class my nigga

If you never try then it is your own fault.You need to stop feeling sorry for yourself,No woman wants a man who is complaining or suggesting his weight is a issue.If you never try then you will never get any thing but once you do you wioll kick yourself in the ass for doing it sooner.After all i consider sex to be one of the best if not the best ever to pick you up or just give you a purpose in life other than being a drone robot working and barely living in this miserable world we live in.....

I'm sure you can find a nice weirdo girl on here who would be willing to sleep with you.

try going on a dateing website. there is somebody out there that is your perfect match. but dont let your insecruity come over you. DONT WORRY theres someone out there who was meant for you!

30! You've got to get on that!

I'd save up and get yourself an escort as a birthday treat!

Lets face facts here.You need a good shag...
A woman wont make you happy,[not unless you find nagging and credit card debt a turn on].

Knock back a glass of scotch ,march on down to a reputable brothel ,and they will make you a very happy man indeed.
The best thing about working girls is they do all the work!!!! bless em

YOU NEED SEX EVEN IF YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR IT.

Awwww... :( You won't die alone, I promise. Yo will find someone, out there, someone who loves you fr you are. You sound handsome :)

Awwah! dont worry im sure u wont die alone! D:

Holy fuck! What a pathetic reject, and wow look how many other failures there are!! Were animals, were supposed to mate and breed if your not capable of that or if no one wants you then you might as well be dead. Pitiful.

No. I'm not gay and I'm only attracted to women. Plus I'm not gonna have sex with a hooker, that's against the law and not safe.

Go see your Doctor and get a blood test.

I could almost exactly write the same story as you - turned out it was a medical problem discovered by accident casing very low testosterone and therefore little or no sex drive.

Knowing yourself is the key, try things totally unrelated to the fact of getting a girl, you will then find what interests you, what you're good at, discover those few things where you know that you will rock, learning the feeling of pride and assurance, the feeling of being in control of yourself, then cut-paste that feeling into your approach with girls. Cause I didn't know where I rocked till I was 30... (i don't know if that's the case for you, but if it is, normal again, most people don't know and some will never find out) Then life helped a little with someone noticing that I was a pretty good singer and giving me the opportunity to do it in front of an audience. (Nothing extravagant, 500 people is my max) This year's experience: A thousand worries the minute before, but once on the stage with the mike in my hand, no thoughts, no fears of forgetting my words or giving a false note, no concern about what I look like, how I move or what the people in the audience might be thinking...Control! This made me realize two things- Nothing matters but the present- even if I had sucked (and I did last year... nobody noticed but I did) my confidence on stage would not be hampered and my life wouldn't be worse because of it. Second, and mostly- How come I can do this and still be afraid of asking a girl out? My self-esteem can't be that deep in the toilet? Doing stuff only a few has the guts to do and apprehending what everybody does...what a moron! Since then my relationship to girls in general doesn't seem so grim anymore, just because of a little change in my attitude... just opening my eyes to the fact that some girls might find me interesting... they've been there all along, I had just been blinded by my complexes so much that I wouldn't admit they were there... sure half of them might turn away if they find out I'm a virgin, but that still leaves the worthy half, wich is waaay more than before... Now if I can just cut/paste... my asking the girl out is a song and wether she rejects me or not, it won't make my life worse... that's where I am now...
But not for much longer.

I'm a 27 year old virgin, your problem might stem from a fear of intimacy or fear of physical intimacy. whenever a guy has tried to kiss me, I push them off because I get extremely uncomfortable. Hope I helped.

I must admit 30 is a little late to still be a virgin...but that doesn't mean anything. If you're sick of not having a girlfriend (and I suspect you are), then there are tons of books out there on how to pick up women. I know this industry has been stigmatized as being some misogynistic scam, but the truth is that many principles in some of those books really do work. There is also no 'definitive' book or author on how to get dates with women. Just shop around and read and study and think and plan and sort out the scammers. Anybody can get a date if they set their sights on getting one. If you just sit around, you'll maybe get one date every 10 years. Get off your ass and do something!

what about one of those blow-ups? get yourself started

It sounds that maybe u gotta be more comfortable and love yourself more. It's harder than it sounds but if u can't truly love yourself, who can you love?

listen mate I was in the same posision as u at one point but I got over the herdle asked that one girl to come back tomine and after that I was like woooaaaw I'm so confident now I can't get a girl out of my bed so u just need toget past the first barrior :)

HAH have you ever watched 40 year old virgin. You'll be fine for another 10 years. hahaaha or you could just order a hooker?

Oh man. I hope you don't wonder why you've never had a girlfriend. You can't have a girlfriend if you've never actually asked somebody out.

I voted yes.. but I meant to vote no.
You just need to get some self confidence. You shouldn't feel perverted by just asking a girl out. If you were brought up by some religious fanatical parents or something to that effect consider rethinking your views on life

Dude i am in the exact same persion as u accept i am only 18 never had sex or a gf :( it sux.

I dont understand why it happens people are always saying that there is some one out there for u but some times maybe its just not true

Spend a month in Thailand. You'll be beating them off with a shitty stick.

dude girls like getting talked to as long as you do it in a respectful manner. and when you do get together take some time before you start getting all grabby feely. you most know shes gonna like it. do it slowly at first and then use your instincts.

The romantic "true love will find you" piss is pointless. Relationships takes work, and to get to know women you need to connect with them. You should work on acknowleging your own self-worth, or being sexually frustrated will become a routine and something you rarely think about. You SHOULD feel that it's an issue, cause it is. BUT start with your feeling of self-worh. Cause the assholes keep breeding anyway, and I guess you're not one of them. Being a nice guy can be hard ;)

NO, It's not normal (then it wouldn't be painful). It is most likely due to low self-esteem. I hated my own guts and blatantly rejected any woman ever coming close to me until I was 29. Sex is still something that happens by accident, I never hit on women cause I feel like a creep.

Remember its very huge sin to lie other sexuality especially if you are straight. So I believe all these people go in hell for their sins. (This is subject of ruining others lifes). So now you know that jealousy is the thing that makes others to ruin lifes. SERIOUSLY

Maybe you know understand definition of virginity "useless women" . You need real woman and ignore these useless women. Trash those women and get better quality.

Being virgin means that you just have not met woman who wants to start family with you + having kids. You just have not met person who is faithful to you (maybe women were sinful towards you). "You have met useless women who dont value family building with you"

I am 28 and also virgin, had on-off relationship with my very first girlfriend (she is martial artist) and suddenly she just break up with me via facebook (she made kid with someone else). After that been single super many years. So ending up a beautiful virgin with athletic body is kind of weird indeed. Especially when they publicly tell lies about my sexuality (they dont know my past relationship, since its my personal secret). Basicly women are really passive towards men and If they give you promise to love you they cheat you by going bed with someone else. So this is the story of my life. Greedings from virgin Ken. Really what you need is someone who is into you without any extra requirements + person must not change who you are. If you are running after someone and they show no interest you are just wasting your time. Seek same valued people and ignore hunting money bitches and women who get easily bed with everyone. When you are kid relationships are easier but when you grow up boy and girl kind of get separated. Women are passive always so you need to start and grab her hand! (My style). But yes some girls also may ask if they can kiss you if you smile (they must already know your smart). Generally you just haven't met right person or someone jealous tells public lies about you (which ruins your relationship future for that area of residency). BEATIFUL MEN ARE ALSO VIRGIN AT 28 SO IT'S JUST THAT YOU HAVE MET WRONG WOMEN IN YOUR LIFE WHO ARE NOT FAITHFUL TOWARDS YOU. God says everyone has other half (soul mate) waiting somewhere of the world so there must be everyone for everybody who is virgin. Remember religion circles highly value virginity and catholic churches you may find other virgin women at that age 30 because of their religion dedication to stay virgin until marriage.

I hate how big of a deal people make losing your virginity. there is seriously nothing wrong with being a virgin you can be fucking 60 and a virgin and I wouldnt give a shit. I hate society. You be you and live life at your own pace dude. dont listen to haters

Sounds rough. You should just get it over with. I dont get it. You live in the west. It should be so much easier. Lots of Asian guys have sex with white girls easy. And they cant even speak american.

I know exactly how you feel, it's the worst feeling in the world! All I ever seem to have is just boring friendships with women who don't want to get serious! I NO longer have anything to do with them anymore thankfully. Yes friendships are good but you want them to develop into a relationship. It's just me but I'm fed up of friendships with women that just end up going nowhere.

Hey people! I'm loving the positive support on here. I just recently turned the big 3-0! And yes, I am 30 year old virgin. Aaand to add to my truths, I'm also a Christian, and trying sooo super hard to uphold my beliefs & standards. I'm definitely not perfect, but I value my self worth, I put God first regardless, I love Him and I love me, not going to devalue that because it's part of who I am. Don't wish to be preaching, and O apologize if I offend any one. Not my intention, just gotta say it. I want say I love God and just leave it at that, well me. (No sermon then, lol.) Belief you me, *sigh* it's hard!!! Do I want I love, sex, a wonderful balanced relationship, Ooooof course!!! (Christ centered and not crazy for me.... ) I also know that in this culture you pretty much need to mentally fit, have a strong similar minded circle and know your set ID (love you, but not selfishly). Know who you are and don't settle! Your deserve to be happy! No need to become a doosh bag or a be*atch,or sad. Our minds are so powerful. Look truly we are strong, and ultimately, as much as others can convince us of things, ideas, whatever, we also do it to ourselves! We are human and we can be jerks, but we are also amazing. And here on this Q&A corner of the internet world's many corners, it's just a speck. We are not alone (ok that totally sounded 'alien invasion status', but you know what I mean).We all do look for connection at the end of the day. Its human and there is Definitely nothing wrong with that!!! I call it in, totally. Answers and connections, its wonderful things!!! Indefinitely, we are a community. And I feel we should connect and support each other! No emotions , attachments, harshness, just support. Maybe a private Facebook group!!! A virgin exclusive thing. Lord knows we need more of those. But the awesome thiing is, we don't have to feel alone, and social issues can be worked on!!! :D I know this might ne extreme, but it's an idea. Don't know you guys, but know I care about ya's, keep a level head, everything is going to be ok, much love. -retrocommunication

Aww cutie. It's okay. I'm sure your soul mate will come around. ^.^

Have you ever watched 40 Year Old Virgin? It's a great movie.
Anyways, it's okay. You're saving yourself. Unless you really want to have sex, that's different.
Don't stress yourself!

i hear if you reach 30 as a virgin you become a wizard

ar you a wizard?

dude !!!! No more thinking about it ! Go to a club and find a girl that wants to have a thing. Keep asking them until a hot or nice girl picks you them buy her food and do her. trust me you will thank me after

Try an online dating website. I assure you it's okay. You won't die alone. And just say you're a virgin because of you're religion if you feel embarrassed by it.

try going on those online dating sites, maybe you can find some pretty girl in the same situation :)

No,nothing wrong. Don't feel pervy at all when hitting on women - they want you to do that, as long as you do it properly. There is a difference between letting a girl know that you are attracted to her and saying/ displaying that you want to have intercourse with her. Seriously, a lot of guys who lose their virginity at an early age are just at the right place at the right time - a matter of chance/luck, really. Being at the right party, hanging with the right people etc. No one really plans when they will lose it, it happens as per circumstances. I lost it a bit late too, mostly because I was very shy and insecure (and most women find me cute. I'm not bragging, just pointing out that even "attractive" guys have troubles approaching ladies, besides, I have a giant nose and an average IQ. Smart people make me feel inadequate from time to time)...besides, from your description of yourself you sound like an ideal partner to me. A 6 feet 2 guy with decent looks would be ideal for a tall model, right ;)

Also, have you ever thought that there might be women in their late 20s or early 30s who are virgins too?

I'm going to be 28 years old in 2 month and yes
I never had sex in my life. Abused by parents when
young, pushed around by others in school, the only
friend I had died in car accident. I can't even look
at peoples' eyes.
I just don't have a single bit of confidence to do anything,
I don't even have a driver's license.

I guess people like us are destined to die alone.

Unusual perhaps, but certainly "normal." There is one thing to look forward to, assuming you get an understanding female who is supportive or your first time: you will discover what true euphoria is. You will be high for days, better than any drug ever invented. At least I was, at the age of 29 when a wonderful woman came into my shell after me, soon after I had decided I was NEVER going to get laid. Interestingly enough, after the initial reaction, losing my virginity didn't seem important anymore. Just socialize as much as you can, join groups, take adult ed classes, whatever, and stop worrying about it. Easy to say, but when I stopped obsessing about it is when it happened for me.

Save your virginity for someone you really love

This IIN question:

I've never been surfing. Is it normal?

I'm 30 years old and I've never tried surfing but I want to! I must be a totalmloser for not finding a beach and surfboard in my back yard waiting for me!

You will find the right person when the time is right, use the internet and its tools, apps, online sites to get comfortable talking to women and that will transcend to the real world.

Go to India those girls crave white dick

Sex is boring. Channel your sexual energy into something you like.

It's okay u are just waiting for the right one.

I had sex for the first time when I was 26 I was a shy guy When i was in high school girls would flirt with me and id have no clue Im really shy but I'm looking for the woman that not afraid to make the first move part of me doesn't want to make girls feel uncomfortable

Because of the fact that you are a virgin, does that mean you'll have sex with any woman on earth no matter how ugly or creepy she is and even if the she's bipolar?

You Should.Just Join A PorNo Businesses Then You Will Get Laid All The Time.

My mom is a virgin.

Get off this site and smash a hoe bruh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I dont care if a guy its too slime or a little over weight who cares.are human and thats what matter.i know few good looking guys but they are so stupid with no brain on , seriously .so its not just the looking its all the package someone whos sweet ,gentle , romantic, good heart,someone whos fun to be around, likes to talk or at least have a nice interesting conversation, i think smart guys are a turn on lol .this kind of things its what i would look on a guy.

Well Wow. You can't be like this, be scared to ask a girl out. Sometimes it doesn't even have to be a girl you like like "that" but she may like you like that and if you give her a chance you might have feelings for her....
Or just ask any gurl out any one time and see how it goes. It doesn't hurt to date a round and see if you actually like somebody... because chances are you can always say no afterwards if you don't like it or you can go with it if u are interested to see where it goes...experience...and experiment...

You won't die alone just get out their

I can help with that. ;)

shame on u .....

i used to be this way, but finally i asked myself would i rather regret being turned down or never being turned down, if your a good guy man your already ahead, thats without adding the fact that your tall which i lack (5'6) and as far as i have seen woman love tall guys. just go for it the worst they can say is no. and if they do move on to the next one.

I know the feeling, I'm afraid I'll die alone too :'( but I still believe there is someone for everyone! I am 20ys old, almost 21. Still a virgin. But the hardest part is I'm gay...People tell me I could easily get a guy, but I wouldn't be happy. I guess we'll just know when that person comes.

I very much respect you and can appreciate a NON-six-packer. =) You'll find someone worth it. Because you clearly are.

I think you should try to definitely work on your confidence, because that seem to be the core of the issue. Not that been a virgin is a problem, but been so extremely shy to your extremes seems unhealthy and excessive for a thirty year old man.

Well.. In Bio-class they say that an average person its virginity at the age of 17,7 so.. youre 30!
So my oppinion is that if youre over 25 and still a virgin its starting to get abnormal to me!
If you feel embarrest to tell anyone just say youre waiting for mariage and if you cant wait, just call a whore or something..
Just go up to a girl and say: ''Wanna hang out tonight, my place?''
Exept if you are Taylor Lautner, a girl wont walk up to you and say: ''Wanna be my BF and have sex?'''
Go out there and go ask out 10 girls.. one of them will say yess!

Aw baby boy that's sad :( hmm try going to the gym perhaps. Girls are attracted to muscle. But not to much..
Don't be afraid to ask a girl out, usually they are flattered :) try giving small compliments. Good luck

Ps. Everyone dies alone

You should ask girls out And try to look nice and what not, I feel like I would find you attractive but than again I don't really know hat you look like, you just need to be more confident.

Chicks wait for dudes to ask them out. If a girl smiles are you, she likes you and she is going to wait for you to ask her out. Don't be afraid, a lot of people are in the same boat. If you don't want to be afraid then don't let other people think you are afraid. No one is judging you and no one knows. People usually think, "what are they thinking about me?."

I'm 25 and a virgin so what who cares i've dated lots of ppl i just havent found the right person so dont feel bad that ur a virgin you will find some one i'm sure thats a lot of ppl out there you just have to get pass your fears and dont listen to these ppl about losing weignt unless you want to you sound nice i'm theres some girl out there for you

Make her your friend first. Don't think so hard into it. Get high. Don't give a fuck! If you fuck up WHO CARES try again and you'll succeed. My girlfriend is my best friend and it became that way because we are so alike. Girls freak out too. They shit and piss too don't worry

That's because you love dicks and cum (especially big ones) and aren't secure enough about it to engage in sex within the bounds of your interests. Your just frustrated. I've got like 9.75"; we should hangout sometime, boi.

Who needs swag when you have good grades? #9lives

Hit the gym bro . Get in shape . Just meet girls online and be like yo are you dtf? Works every time

You should be glad to be a virgin at this age.

No offense, but go out and get some puntang... its really not that big of a deal, but you are 30.

Get a girl, quick!

see dude...i feel i m like u...but the most imp problem is that we r lazy and specially me, i like whining a lot more then trying..so stop being a cry baby and remember u r at the bottom now...so u cant be more pathetic...so the only way for u is to go up no matter what u do...so start doing something and do chat with me later...bye and ttyl

get laid hooker anything dont be a pussy just get some

The only thing abnormal about you is that you have put yourself out there and named it. Thats really amazing. So many people think they are abnormal about sex because ..... why - society says so? Its what works for you, what your circumstances are and how you deal with it. I know lots of people who have had sex "later in life" or not at all. Sex is great (and sometimes not so great) and there are loads of people out there having fantastic sex and are utterly miserable. Sex and all its taboos and mixed messages messes with peoples heads.

You have expressed a need to have a sexual relationship. The fact that you haven't had one by a certain age (society says you "should have" by now) is what I think is the real problem. You believe something is "wrong with you' and that keeps feeding your insecurities till they feel insurmountable. Have you thought of getting some really good counselling? Speaking from experience, it equips you with insight and self awareness to have the power to start exploring who you are and how you can feel good about what makes you the unique person you are. You can start loving yourself - not in a narcissistic - I'm perfect way - more in the sense of self acceptance. It gives people permission to relax around you and want to know you. Whether this leads to a relationship or not - it can only make you feel better about yourself knowing you are ready and emotionally available for one. This is what makes people attractive and want to be initmate with each other. Sex is easy - relationships are hard work.

Go on - keep being brave!Get some coucnselling and take control of your life. You are already strong in just posting this question. The first step is always the hardest but you can do it. I did and I've never been happier.

Ur not obese u just don't worrie Manet try a dating site and trust me you soon will find that one and don't have sex until you are married plz

You should lose some weight, you're morbidly obese and that can't help.

You should lose some weight

Fatty get a life have fuck a girl

Lose some weight fatty!

dude i know how you feel kinda, for me talking to girls is easy but as soon as i'm attracted to a girl i turn into a complete retard, i know its scary and you get that dry throat and heart palpitations but you just gotta talk to em like a normal person, just ask about her and say a little about urself as if your making a new friend and then if you hit it off just be like, hey you wanna go for a drink or you wanna chill and watch a movie sometime, or whatever. As long as you're not pervy or gross about it then the worst u'll get is a 'no sorry thanx', which may be a little awkward but u just shrug it off and be like thats cool and just keep repeating this process untill you get a 'yeh that would be great'. also it helps with the nerves if you ask her to hang out without a bunch of people listening in.

dude, i would so take care of that for you.

aww try online dating

I was a virgin-by-choice until 27 years of age. However, with my case, I felt the crushing weight of not just betrayal, a child-hood that was subjected to abuse by the parental-units of the time (even into my early 20s), but it got to the point where I felt like there's no longer any reason to reserve myself since girls always seemed to end up with someone else anyway. I was in love with someone for over a decade but later on I forced myself to re-program my mind to regard her as not being worthy (a lot of conflicts of values it turned out).

That combined with several other devastating experiences led me up to having a one-week sexual-affair until she seemed to have disappeared and ultimately losing my virginity to a 36-year-old married woman whom I met at a church during a free dinner service (they probably do this to get converts). I have radically changed my opinion about sex since my early years & now wish I had taken all of the girls who were obviously interested in me throughout my life-time in order to have given them the pleasures of sex that I now realised they deserve.

Like other posters said , it does seem a little late to still be a virgin but I really don't think you are trying enough to get a girl, it seems like a confidence issue but you've just got to realise the worst answer you'll get is no. I'm only 21 , haven't been a virgin since 16, some people find that acceptable , to me I regret it, nothing special unless it's with someone you actually care about, but join a group, head to the gym, and make it a goal to look good , as when you look good you'll feel good and become more confident. Just go for it buddy and good luck

Everyone dies alone; having a relationship by thee time you die does not guarantee simultaneously dying.
It's not completely normal to be a virgin at 30, but hey it happens. The thing that no one needs to know you are; with a little bit of confidence you can do anything.

If the idea of thinking about sex with a woman makes you feel like a pervert, perhaps you should evaluate your feelings about sex and sexuality before getting a partner.

I'm 28 and I've never even kissed a girl, or a guy, or ever even had a friend. But then again I'm a emotional traumatized person that might as well have grown up in a cave. Live on SSI in a rented attic. Family brings me food, buys me stuff from time to time. Haven't left here in YEARS!

Lose some weight men, it would definitely help your confidence and you looks

Lose weight and meet new people.
The only thing I like about you as of now, is that you arent one of the fucks who thinks that they need to have sex constantly.

You have to be willing to look in places where women are available. Churches, civic groups, prison, stuff like that. Yes, I said prison. I am involved in prison ministry through my church, and that is how I met my woman. She is 10 years younger than me, she is a Christian, and she is beautiful.

Dude, don't give up hope. I could give you the address of another lady I met via prison ministry who is looking for a man on the outside, if you're interested.

whats the big deal? Go on a dating site, and meet up with someone if they want to as well, trust me, I know from experience that meeting someone online is muuuuch easier than in person for allot of people =)

Dear Friend , well this is my second post ,and i do hope that mabye you at least concidered my suggestion of seeking 'professional asisstance' to get yourself shagged..
If not then please go...Just about all prostitutes are nice girls [well at least they are nice to me!] ,and you can live out your fantasies ,and then resume your day to day immediately...If love has found you in the mean time, then happy days to you.....

that IS intense. i don't know man. women are out there.

don't worry. There are over 6 billion people on this earth there has to be at least one person for everyone.
You just need to walk up to the next beautiful girl you see and ask her out. Don't worry about the consequences either she says yes or no. what do you have to lose.

Dateing websites, there are almost 7 billion other people in the world, someone is bound to like you.

hey man keep your chin up high dude get on a dating website i feel the same abit pervy but i talk to girls anyway jus try your best and block out emotions they r probs whats slowing you down and yes u r defenatly normal

good for you

If you were smart, which you seem to be in the least reasonably smart, you would simply take Ilovesmellybox's
advice, forget a relationship, it's a stupid concept, go get a shag if that's really what you need.

You could be like me and not realize it, not wanting anyone else in your life is normal enough to me, then again I'm emotionless so, maybe you like the whole "love" idea.

are you gay?

That is sad

awwwh i find tht cute :) hve confidence ask a gurl yu know out for a drink hi the bar,strip ckub anything btw sex is awsowme yu need to tryy;D

fuck the bullshit. if you like drugs, go to a rave. or a good club. pop a X pill and open up to someone you like. im 24 and ive only recently started to understand women. that has worked and shown me a lot and no it didnt make me an addict nor did it make me dumb. its worth a shot. and im not into party girls either but it gives u insight, and it seems that is what you seek.

It's not really normal to be a 30 year old virgin.. but then again I do live with a lady that's about 55 - 60 that's still a virgin.. (she's rude to everyone and all my friends says she should find a boyfriend and get laid, lol) but it is normal to be nervous about asking a girl out. try the dating site idea or go to a bar and find yourself a pretty one, don't rush into a relationship and move moderately in life, keep a positive mood and always remember, Rome was not built in a day!

Hello there,

There is something you need to understand. Ever since the beginning of mankind, man has always taken the initiative to woo the woman rather than the other way around. Automatically, this means that by default men have to be more prepared to take rejections. If you are willing to accept that, then I would like to think that it will help you gain more confidence. This is just the fact of life. From your posting, it would appear to me that you just don't have the confidence of asking girls out and this could be it.

I totally agree with other posters that you could try a dating website. There is such a large pool of girls there that even if one turns you down, it will be comforting to know that there are always others.

Despite all this advice, it still doesn't explain why I'm a 30 year-old male virgin myself.

I hope you can gain confidence in your decision; you know that it's not your looks or anything personal, but maybe it's just lack of confidence. You won't get a date if you don't ask :) Girls love strait forward guys. An internet dating sight might be a good idea, or some sort of 30 second dating. Even just joining a club or something to meet new women. Good luck!

There is no straight cut answer to this, it either does or doesn't happen. If you want ADVICE there's ALOT to find, hehe.