I am afraid of social situations because i think i'm too boring?

I get really scared, nervous, and anxious whenever I have to be in a situation with people who are around my age group or older than me. With people who are much younger I feel more relaxed and comfortable like I can just be weird and socially awkward and they will just think I'm like that creepy older relative that everyone has. But around everyone else it's as if there are all these expectations about how people want you to act a certain way. I keep thinking that I should appear to be funny, intelligent, interesting, knowledgable about many things, maybe sometimes sarcastic, generally keep the conversation flowing when it seems to be stalling, and also pay attention to the other person's or people's emotions and body language. And at the same time I should have plenty of cool stories to share about my own experiences and experiences with family and friends, as well as my personal views on things. You know...it's like there is just too much pressure to appear a certain way in social situations. I think this would all be a lot easier if I actually had some friends and was an interesting person who was fun to be around and had lots of good experiences, but the truth is that I don't have friends, I don't have any stories to share about myself or my friends or family, I haven't really experienced much in my life and all of this makes me an incredibly boring person. I honestly don't feel like I know anything about anything to be able to have a decent conversation about it. So when I am put into a situation where I have to pretend to be social I just don't know what to do, I get stressed out, other people I'm with start to feel uncomfortable because they can tell I'm being unnatural and awkward. And I just want to run away and not have to deal with other people expecting me to be a certain way. I wish I could just blend into a crowd and not have to deal with any of this.

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86% Normal
Based on 14 votes (12 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • _Jesus_

    This is why I am only friends with mimes. The downside is that very few of them can think outside of the box

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  • mysistersshadow

    Just work on your confidence. Fake it til you make it.

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  • Same here man. I'm only a confident speaker when I know I'm superior to the person I'm talking to. If the person I'm talking to is socially awkward or short, I can speak to them very confidently, but if the opposite is true, I get intimidated and quiet. Still working on it myself, but I'll try to give advice regardless.

    I don't like how to win friends and influence people to be honest. It spawns annoying retards who won't stop asking stupid questions. "Heyyy so did you go to school around here? Oh, that's amazing! What major are you going for? WOW!!!!" etc etc. When I meet new people, it's usually super obvious if they read how to win friends because they're some of the most obnoxious and fake people in the room. How to win friends who are idiots more like.

    I think the key is to improve your self image. If you become confident in your own abilities, you'll fell more inclined to speak what's on your mind. Part of that is having a general knowledge of the world in order to be prepared for a conversation with anybody. You must read the news, study history, and study the natural sciences, among other things. Then work on studying your peers. Go on twitter to keep up to date with pop culture trends. Watch mainstream television to gain insight into the psychology of the populace. Give yourself all the tools you need to succeed in a conversation, and then you can have a legitimately good conversation instead of resorting to the dirty tricks in how to win friends.

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    • Roustabout

      How tall are you?

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      • Why do you want to know? I didn't ask you to write my biography.

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        • Roustabout

          I want to know if I am superior to you in your view.

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          • I didn't literally mean superior, I meant in a psychological way.

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  • riffraffy

    Reading the book 'How to Win Friends and Influence People' would do wonders for you. Conversation is a skill that takes time to train, but it helps a ton to take a genuine interest in other people. Make them feel important and they will love you for it.

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  • AbnormallyAwesome

    I know that feeling quite well. My solution is to just ask questions. That solves almost everything. You don't have to one-up people's stories; Most people like to talk about themselves anyway. So if someone tells a good story just ask them more about it:
    "Really? How long have you been doing skydiving?",
    "Was that your first assassination?",
    "And how did you get out of North Korea?"
    People will love to talk to you, because they'll feel interesting.

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  • xfg19

    You could just fall down a flight of marble stairs.

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