I cover myself in stale feces and masturbate?

Recently I started to like covering myself in stale feces and masturbating. Almost every morning I walk around my neighborhood with a large black garbage bag and collect all the crap I see. It takes a whole day to get two bags full of shit. But it all pays off when I come home after a hard day, go to the bathroom, turn on the hot water and…mmm, pour all the crap into the bathtub. And then I masturbate, imagining that I’m being devoured by all the feces. All in all, I think, that poo has its own mind, each pile of shit has its own family, place, feelings, we shouldn’t just flush them down the toilet, we should take care of them, talk to them, pet them… And you know what, I had a wonderful dream while lying in the bathtub yesterday, I dived into the sea and it turned into shit, fish, seaweed, jellyfish, everything turned into poo, even the sky, Allah himself.

Voting Results
27% Normal
Based on 88 votes (24 yes)
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Comments ( 19 )
  • sourgrapes

    No it's not bloody well fucking normal.ffs

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  • xfg27

    I prefer laying in a bathtub full of mangled rotting corpses

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  • Terence_the_viking

    Sounds like a shit idea.

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  • shutyourdirtyfilthyfucknmouth

    Bullshit you fucking creep.i bet you love sucking cock!

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  • Rusty-Rider

    You should start a religion and build a church out of poo.
    There are lots of screwy people that would join your church and you could all run around and pick up dog shit.
    The community would be a cleaner, healthier place and you and your parishioners would be happy little shit lovers.
    Good luck and keep the faith.

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  • CreamPuffs

    Really.

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  • mathewdavis133

    That is fucking disgusting....

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  • ruffrider

    I wank...NO SHIT.

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  • rubbercock2

    Fucking bullshit idiot!

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  • thewonderingfreak

    im not sure but i think this is a troll post

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    • That's a real story I'm not a troll.

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      • schizo_belly

        Really?

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      • thewonderingfreak

        oh, ok. Just making sure. Well what ever gets you off.

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  • orsen

    Throw some goldfish into the bathtub dude, you'll thank me

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  • 4eversleepy

    you're definitely insane

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  • jethro

    troll post

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    • Copstilax

      You have the intelligence of a peanut.

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      • jethro

        Ouch that really hurt. Try again grasshopper. See you next Tuesday.

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  • RoseIsabella

    http://www.vexidus.org/stuff/Cats/cat-see_what_you_did_there.jpg

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