I don't talk to people who don't talk to me, scared of sounding dumb.

83% Normal
2 Comments

I think I've got some kind of psychological complex.

I've been told I'm autistic most of my life, not that anyone ever explained what that is. Anyway when I was a kid I never made friends, it's a mix of being an introvert and being the only non-athlete in a tiny class. In high school I kinda started to become more extroverted but well I never learned to extro.

Lack of experience, plus being told I'm different in a way so vague I couldn't not interpret it as retarded, I never really talked to people unless they spoke first or if it was important. So I never learned to socialize, so I kept worrying that I had no idea how to not sound stupid, so I never made friends, so I never learned to socialize... I can't break this cycle. I think I need help.

Voting Results
83% Normal
Based on 12 votes (10 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 2 )
  • Cheryll
    7 years ago

    I am/was that kinda way, too, and I am neither autistic nor have I been diagnosed with anything else. I did, as you are, struggle immensely with socializing. It got to the point where I reached out for help and went to see a psychologist on a regular basis. This really has helped me a lot, and I realized that my main problem was feeling so insecure about myself, and that I did not want to make myself even more of a target by starting a conversation and making myself even more vulnerable. However, therapy has helped tons, and I now am able to talk NORMALLY to people, even if I don't know yet whether they already like me or not. I would recommend it to you, too! And just to clarify: random people telling you you're autistic is NOT a diagnosis, trained people would have to diagnose that.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
      -
    • Knightmare
      7 years ago

      Thanks. I'm starting to meet with a counselor actually, it's already been helpful. Glad to hear that it's helped you too. I agree that my main issue is some form of insecurity, I was just... I dunno, scared that I couldn't fit in. Of course that's just garbage, I realize that I'm not that different, but this mentality has developed habits so deep I can't figure out how to change it. Like, I've no idea how to actually be social, is there much more to it than just walking up to people to talk, how do I get to the point where they're comfortable with me inviting them to stuff, is it weird to ask this guy I've been chatting with for a week to a movie or will they think it's a weird romantic date attempt from a stranger, why don't I know anything aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

      I guess this is just something that needs to be learned. I dunno. Certainly can't be helpful that I've been isolating myself all my life.

      The autism diagnosis is official tho, spoke with doctors and everything. Not that it's as obvious as it was when I was a kid. It's so weird, I got special classes in school but nobody ever bothered to explain why. And they were mostly for stuff that I was already good at anyway. Emotion recognition and such. Maybe I just don't have any social instincts, is that a thing? Seriously, I just don't know anything, I don't even know what I don't know. DERP.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0