I like my house but is it normal to get anxious when i have to get out

I think Ive become a recluse, sometimes I don't leave my house for weeks at a time, unless I go outside to work in the yard or do repair & maint on the out side of the house. As long as I stay in "my little world" (ie: My House, My Yard.)I am fine.
But if I HAVE to get out & about I feel anxious & agitated. If I have a choice, like an invite to get together with friends or family, errands, Grocery Shopping etc. I always seem to find a reason why I can't go. And if I feel pressured to go, then I start feeling sick - Head ache, stomach ache etc.
Until recently it always Seemed like My Choice, My Decision, its what I wanted to do. But lately Im starting to wonder. Some days are worse than others, but there have been a few times that even going to Walgreens has caused me so much anxiety that when I got into the car I couldnt remember how to drive. The Walgreens pharmacist has run my meds by a couple of times on his way to lunch. Fortunatly there have only been a few of those days. Mostly I am perfectly content working on remodeling projects and talking to my wiener dogs. I only start stressing about it when someone gets on my case about it. I have lived with my guy for 8 years and for the most part he accepts it, he even goes grocery shopping, but every now and then he'll get really angry about it. When he does I will "find" a major project that just HAS to be done, so that I have some justification
Last time I completly gutted the laundry room, so I could remodel & update it...Of course I couldn't go anywhere then until the laundry room was done. After all, we do need clean clothes.
Isn't that pathetic. My Dr gave me some pills for depression, but I don't really feel depressed. I Know I need to get some help or something, (it only gets worse as time goes by) but I just don't know what or where to begin. The more I fret or dwell on it the worse it seems. Can anyone offer guidence or advice??

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49% Normal
Based on 41 votes (20 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • blaybee

    The world is your domain, not just your house or your yard! Think of the entire planet as your space. You have as much right to it as anybody else!

    Confidence in this is 100% the way to extend your domain!

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  • snowflake4m

    It sounds like at the least you are introverted. (As am I, and it is completely normal to be an introvert). At most, though, you may have agoraphobia or be bordering on it. It is normal to want to isolate at times; we all need our "alone time" and space. But humans are social animals and we also need some social activity, though we all vary in just how much we need. That said, I have a touch of agoraphobia myself (due to extremely screwed-up circumstances) so I can empathize and relate.

    Try taking "small steps." Things I like to do are go out for a walk in the woods or on the beach. Nature restores my sanity and you can be alone. But the important thing is to get out of the house before something like agoraphobia truly sets in and you are a prisoner of your own home and your own thoughts. Trust me, I speak from experience.

    To start socializing (on a very small scale) try going to bookstores (if you enjoy reading) or coffee shops. I enjoy those kinds of places because they usually draw other introverted (and intelligent) people. A good conversation (of the one-on-one variety) can be had over a good book. Likewise with coffee. Neither place is overtly threatening.

    I would stay away from malls and other very crowded places. They give me the heebie-jeebies :)
    It also sounds like your doctor should have prescribed an anti-anxiety med along with the antidepressant. I find antidepressants don't help much in my particular situation, but anti-anxiety meds can be very helpful. If you feel anxious when you socialize and it sounds like you do, an anti-anxiety medication sounds much more appropriate. I would ask about it, at the very least.

    I really relate to and sympathize with you and I wish you the best of luck. Again, start small. Hope this helps some. :)

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  • 53739

    I used to be like that before I had to work but now I'm forced to leave the house everyday and after a while you get used to it. Not saying that I'm still not an introvert but it helps to put yourself out there.

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  • zate528

    You're an introvert. I feel for you.

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  • chimeg

    There's nothing wrong with preferring to stay at home. However if leaving the house causes you this much anxiety, you definitely have a problem you need to work with.

    I'm a bit of a hermit, myself, but I try to leave the house every day to do grocery shopping, just go for a walk, or to go somewhere (like a museum, library, cinema, etc.)

    You say your partner accepts your behaviour, but have you talked about it? Perhaps you could discuss it and find out if there is something the two of you could do together to help you. This isn't something you can solve overnight, obviously, but if you have someone on your side maybe you could make some progress.

    Is your doctor a psychiatrist, and has he offered any help besides the antidepressants? Medication alone really isn't enough in a situation like this.

    I don't have the same problem as you, although I've had periods where I've completely isolated myself in for months, only leaving my apartment to buy groceries. I've struggled with social anxiety and depression for many years. During my last year at university, I used to go to a psychiatric centre for students to eat lunch or dinner. It was a safe environment where I would meet others without actually having to talk to them much (I don't think I could have handled any kind of group therapy). I kind of miss it, but I'm not a student any more and they don't have anything like that here for adults. But that's enough of my life story, all I meant to write was that if you ask/nag your doctor, he might come up with something that could help you. I forget what I'm talking about sometimes :)

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  • Shackleford96

    Start with something very small such as riding a bicycle or something to the end of the street and back. Gradually try to do something a little more outgoing each day and just concentrate on not getting so anxious about it. Try to think about other things instead. Also, get your husband to do these things with you so that you feel safe. I hope that helps, good luck.

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    • ClaraO

      Thank You. Now that I've realized this has some how gone beyond my free choice, practicing some of your suggestions will surely begin to help. Thanks again for taking the time to share your good advice.

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      • Shackleford96

        You're welcome :)

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