I'm a strongly devoted christian, but my soulmate is a firm athiest..?

I chose my religion over a guy I believed I was in love with. He was amazing but forcing his strict atheisu beliefs on me, whereas religion is something that will always be a part of me. If he is not open to your beliefs, be sly and open him up to them(not necessarily convert him). Stay with him if he is able to accept you but keep your future in mind. Do you see yourself with him? How would you raise your kids? Christian wedding? Discuss this whether it causes an argument or not, you need to know where you stand.

Be yourself and don't ever change or let him change you

How can you be "soulmates" if he doesn't believe in souls?
And don't you want to be together in the after life...if he doesn't believe wont he go to hell?
Id try to convince him to believe in God "just in case" hey its better than being wrong.

This is a serious issue.
If you ever have kids, you'll never stop fighting over how to raise them and forever spend time teaching them that the other parent is wrong.
Rather end it sooner than later.

"Don't make me choose between my man and my God, because you just can't win." -Marge Simpson

"There you go again, always taking someone else's side. Flanders, the water department, God..." -Homer Simpson

I can speak only from a point of view similar to Josh's.

I am an agnostic atheist, and it is a real deal breaker if my love interest is religious, or in my opinion, irrational. It would absolutely bug the hell out of me if she'd say things along the lines of god making mountains, because I know how mountains truly are formed; its not a real big deal at this point, but it just gets really annoying.

In my opinion, even though you two are in love, some beliefs just aren't compatible, especially (like others have mentioned) when it comes to eventually teaching your kids.

As long as you don't try to "save" him or burn his books you should be ok.

And as for your children, don't force your beliefs down their throats - they have a right to control their own minds

In my experience, you should never let little things like politics, religion or favourite sports teams stand in the way of love.

I would normally say this kind of thing is a deal breaker but you've kind of convinced me this is your only serious issue. BUT still, what do you think will happen when you want your kids raised christian?

Stranger things have happened!

To be honest, I'd punch you in the ovaries if you said things like "wow, God makes the most beautiful things" on a regular basis. It's just annoying, being forced to listen to some ones belief system, while you're otherwise not having a religious conversation. I'd imagine an atheist would be especially annoyed.

Brainwashed people never realize that they're brainwashed. Perfect example here.

It means you are open minded and don't judge.

@RedShift
I think it's pretty normal to have a desire to live in fellowship, community and harmony with the Creator and others. My experience is people who lack a desire for a spiritual life and relationship with God are already filling what I call the God Hole (the void within us)with something else...false beliefs, sex, relationships, drugs, gambling, greed of money, idolization of others incl celebrities, brands, material items, appearances and Fear(i could go on). These things leave people feeling unforefilled and directionless in life. I have experience a life as one of these people. I did explore many things and ways of life. I have lived agnostic, wiccan, atheist and I have made up my own beliefs when nothing fit the spiritual area of my life.

I know God to be true because I have experience him, the Holy Spirit Himself. I did not ask for it, no one was present, no one "brainwashed" or taught me the experience I had.

I experience a moment of vunerability. I decided to attend a Christmas Eve service about 15 years ago and I experineced God there.

You can't argue with experience. Perhaps I am wrong about you but is it possible your God Hole is an empty void, or is is stuffed full of useless stuff.

I realize I don't have a single clue about you. I poured my heart out to Mandy because I can relate to her experience. I am not sure why you felt the need to comment. It doesn't seem to me she looking to change her beliefs. She trying to figure out if she can have a relationship as a Christian with an atheist.

Judging me doesn't change me or help her but hey I'd love to continue this conversation and get to know you better. I am curious where it would go.

Blessings

k Mandy
here's what I know. First off I will tell you a bit about me so you know where this is coming from. Be aware I have been going on some really long days. I just got back from preparing for choir practice for the Christmas Eve service at my church. I have a close relationship with most of the 5 pastors at my church because I work in the church office 3 times a week. This is reasonable new experience for me. I have been there since July. I was born into a Christian family, dysfunctional and am now a recoverying Addict going on 5.5 years.

I think the best advice I can give is to share my experience. I am not sure what your experience with Christ is like. If you experience the Holy Spirit in a way in which you know God is a real and true God. Your Salvation and Life.

I have I walked away many times from Christ even after Baptism. I did not have good example/ role models in my life of how to walk with Christ. I did not understand why God put all these rules on me as a christian. I certainly did not recognize that God/ Jesus spoke these very things because he was concerned for my welbeing and wanted the very best for me. He has such a big love for us, All of us.

I have a non Christian Boyfriend. He tries to be supportive. He even reads the Bible with me and comes to church often. But he does not know the Christ I know.We typically fight about how my life revolves around Christ though.

I thought it would work because we loved each so much before. Our addictions tore our relationship apart once before but we are back together repairing the damage after almost 4 long years apart or so I thought.

I feel your heart ache and frustration.

It soon became aparent what was missing. I have a desire to have to close loving marriage like that of people I know who truly live in Christ like the Elders in my Church. They pray together, read the bible together, build relationships in the community, in life groups and in their family's, volunteer in service to Christ and the surrounding community of our church and worldwide. They have Christ like values, they are humble, admit their mistakes, take leadership, are acountable and hold other accountable. They live in community with Christ and share this outside of their community. They love in a way that is an action not a feeling- they act lovingly through Christ in challenging circumstances. They lead Christ center not self centered lives.

The more I see this the more I desire it. The more I experience the lonely void of the separation between the 2 most important relationships in my life. Jesus and my BF my heart aches.

There are many times I am tired and hurting and I pray alone or not at all, I choose the comfort of snuggling up to my BF or taking a nap or tuning into the TV to avoid life. In times of distress when I am at work it is not unheard of to pray together as a staff team we do it regularly. But with my BF he would never say " you are obviously hurting lets take the time to pray about that". There is no one to praise the grace He gives us in life closely and intimitly.I often feel single in my relationship because I do much of the social events on my own.

A Christian marriage unites you, your husband and Christ in a loving relationship with greater benefits then what I have been settling for.

In the past my BF and I lived common law. When we got back together I had such a strong desire to surrender to the journey Christ intended for me. I knew deep in my heart the kind of sacrifice Jesus made you, me and the world. His love for us is so incomprehensiable, it must have been so difficult to leave us, the thing he love so very much. I say no sacrifice is to great for God to ask of us because he gave everything, yet I risk loosing that in this relationship.

I believe God put my BF back in my life and I hoped and prayed and share with others in pray in hopes he would fully come to know Christ but I don't know that it will ever happen. I have become more and more unhappy.

I am very sad I love my God and my BF but I know God must come first.

Please tell me more about your situation? I would like to talk with you more. I hope sharing my experience has helped you.

I would like to know more about how you are practicing your faith. Do you have a church and a community your involved in? Are you living with your boyfriend?

What do you think Christ's hope for you was when he put you on this earth? How much love do you think he has for you? And how much love does God deserve in return? How do you honor God's great sacrifice and how do you honor yourself in this situation?

I ask myself these questions... they are so hard.

I recently told my BF how unhappy I was and what I had decovered about my desires in marriage and Christ. I challenged him to explore what being a Christian meant to him and that as much as I wanted to marry him I would never marry a non affirm Christian or unpracticing Christian. (he makes vague remarks about believing in Christ without entirely understanding it sometimes)

My heart goes out to you Grrl!

Sister in Christ.

I'm sorry to hear that your guy has no respect for other people's beliefs. Even the people who are close to him. I'm not religious myself, but the only people I hate are arrogant atheists. Seriously, he doesn't have to change his ways for you and you don't have to change your faith for him. it's all a matter of being respectful towards your partner.

Im pretty sure he'll be fine with it if you dont go WAY all out. Im not christian, so I understand how he feels, and I believe him. But I do think that hes overreacting. If you two cant stop arguing about it, then it isnt really love. Love is trust, loyalty, and accepting each others beliefs.

I'll do my best to change in good ways. Thanks for the advice guys. :D

This is really hard x.x

If you are a Christian then you know you are not to be unequally yoked. This is not some little thing that can be dismissed. It is a fundemental difference and should be non negotiable. Think about having children and the comments he will make as you are trying to bring your children up to love God. I can tell you some because my dh has said them to our children despite years of promises not too. You can love many people even though you might not see it that way now. Good luck to you.

A relationship is all about compromising. You must accept him for who he is.