I'm an awful neighbor

24% Normal
19 Comments

Sitting here, taking stock of my life, confronted with a clear pattern of sociopathic behavior towards my neighbors. Oh well. That's who I am. I have a junkpile and a ratty couch on my porch to boot. I burn my garbage. I'm a shithead. The neighborhood shithead. I'm not getting rid of my junk until the price of scrap recovers which better happen soon because I'm sitting on beer can mountain over here! Thanks Obama. Fuckin bullshit.

Voting Results
24% Normal
Based on 41 votes (10 yes)
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Comments ( 19 )
  • Mario25
    7 years ago

    Don't give a damn about your neighborhood. Because it's clear you don't care about them so don't think about them.
    I hope you get good price for your couch.
    Sell your garbage. You may get 1 cent for every pound. Don't burn it.
    You can make a chainmail armour with beer can opener rings.
    Play videogames. It will help you calm your nerves.
    Watch kungfu panda and find inner peace.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      7 years ago

      The couch is not for sale.

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      • dirtybirdy
        7 years ago

        Where are you located? I'm interested in the couch and I'd like to come take a look at it at my convenience.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          7 years ago

          If I sell you my couch then what will I sit on as I leer at my neighbors? Besides it smells like cat pee and onions (BO, if you will) but now that it's outside you hardly notice.

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          • dirtybirdy
            7 years ago

            The smell isn't an issue. How about I trade 2 broken milk crates and a pallet for it? You can keep the cushions too, I just need the inside area.

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            • Mario25
              7 years ago

              It's a very good deal you are offering. I hope our op friend considers it.

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            • Anonymous Post Author
              7 years ago

              It is a very well-built couch, 70's, hardwood frame and it looks almost identical to Al Bundy's. You'll have to sweeten the pot.

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          • Mario25
            7 years ago

            I suggest you sell the couch to miss birdy before your neighbors burn it thinking it's your garbage. You know sometimes neighbors are a huge pain.

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  • bluff17
    7 years ago

    One of your neighbors is hating you in this moment and so I am. I hate people like you but as idk you I don't give a shit about it

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  • Ass_gas
    7 years ago

    Y'all are supposed to reload your own .22 ammunition, line up beer cans on the fence and shoot them off. Without loud stereos, cars with holes in the muffler or shooting rifles, I don't see how you can be a genuine shithead.

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  • Fall_leaves
    7 years ago

    The woman across the street keeps harassing my neighbor. She walks her dogs twice a day and walks past my neighbor and calls her a "whore" or flips her off on a regular basis. She's a scarier version of martha stewart.

    I was leaving one morning, I had my hand on the doorknob and as I looked out the window, there she was huffing and puffing up the yard. I b-lined to the kitchen and waited for her to get done banging on the door and army crawled back to the living room. I slowly propped myself up to make sure she was gone and scoped out her yard to make sure she wasn't waiting for me. The coast was clear or so I thought. I ran out the door, locked it as quickly as possible and sprinted to my car and as I was backing out...there she was standing behind her screen door, staring me down.

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  • Ellenna
    7 years ago

    Ha ha, so it's all Obama's fault you live in a shitheap? Never mind, the trumpet will make you GREAT again ....

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      7 years ago

      No but I am relatively certain he is responsible somehow for the abysmal scrap metal prices. .25¢/lb for cans is ridicuuuuuuuulous! They can fuck right off for that. I've been storing them for over a year now waiting for prices to recover and in that time I've also added a busted dryer to my miscellaneous junk heap in the yard (next to the burn barrel)

      Trump would fix the scrap metal mess.

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      • Ellenna
        7 years ago

        Good luck with that ........ I've had experience with scrap metal prices for 40 years and frequent fluctuations are caused by the international markets, these days China's.

        Australia's largest steel mill is about to close and another one is closing in Wales, UK - nothing to do with Obama, all to do with cheap Chinese steel flooding the world market, a lot of it made from Australia's iron ore. I guess that's Obama's fault too?

        I look forward to the trumpet fixing everything so those steel mills and others can re-open: the people of Whyalla and Wales will be delighted to be able to look forward to that.

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          7 years ago

          I've seen some ups and downs too albeit much less than 40 years worth. This time is the worst in my memory. I've never seen scrapyards close down before but 3 near me are gone now leaving only 1 open. It's heartbreaking, honestly. I was somewhat joking about Obama and I did try to read up on why the scrap market crashed but I don't understand what I read. China yadda yadda but why? How? What is the future? I didn't get much from the articles I read. Luckily I have a large barn for my ever-growing can mountain.

          Thanks for your post and thanks in advance if you can share more of your experience and knowledge on the topic.

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          • Ellenna
            7 years ago

            Re China: why? because they can, because they are a huge market dominating world markets in many areas: for example, buying up Australian farms to grow food for themselves. Why this is being allowed is a good question, to which I'd love to know the answer.

            How? I don't understand international economics but like anything else, the most powerful will exploit everyone else as much as they can get away with. That's how capitalism works: ironic that it's a so-called communist country doing so well out of capitalism, eh?

            China has been buying Australia's iron ore for quite a while, which created a huge mining boom, now over, and making it into low grade steel, which we now buy back from them - work that one out! According to building industry and trade union sources, it's such poor quality that it's actually dangerous for use in construction work.

            The future - anyone's guess but it wouldn't surprise me if China ends up totally controlling the world economy before this century is out, although I won't live long enough to see it.

            Just to give you a rough idea of scrap metal price fluctuations, when a friend and I collected old car batteries back in the 70's the price increased nearly ten fold when the russians invaded afghanistan because the lead was needed for bullets ...... we felt like war profiteers! Another thing: about 10 years ago I very reluctantly sold my beloved old nearly dead 4WD for the then scrap metal price of $1000 but when I sold an old station wagon last year I only got $200 for it, admittedly not as much metal as the truck had, but still .........

            I'm just guessing, but I suppose if there's a glut of cheap steel on the market, scrap metal isn't needed for reycling into steel products so it's harder to sell or won't get the prices it used to get.

            Good luck with your scrap mountain!

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