I think my stepdad is attracted to me

26% Normal

So recently my mother met a guy. She met up with him for the first time on my 18th birthday. And he's a really good guy. He's sweet, has great kids, and does things for us that a normal dad would do. Well when I turned 18, I got some money that was left to me. He ended up needing money (and I was completely okay with helping him). But the only problem is that ever since I gave him money I think he's been eyeing me? Maybe I'm being paranoid but he tells everyone I'm his favourite (which is plain rude to my other siblings- even if it doesn't mean it rudely) and even told my mother that if they ever broke up he would miss me more than he missed her. We spend a lot of time together (with my mother/as a family) and I always catch him staring at me, talking about how short my shorts are, that he notices I'm not wearing a bra, etc. Sometimes he'll text me saying he misses me. It didn't make me uncomfortable until he said that about missing me more than he missed my mother. Idk if this is normal or not or if I'm just being paranoid? Again, he's never touched me inappropriately it's just the premise of some of his actions. Please help :)

Voting Results

26% Normal

Based on 42 votes (11 yes)

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Comments ( 68 )

RoseIsabella

5 years ago | pl

Eww.

Okay, first off, is he married to your mother? If this guy is not married to your mother he's not your stepfather, period, end of story.

Secondly, regardless of whether or not you are okay with it it's less than appropriate for him to be borrowing money from you. If he's old enough to be dating your mother he's old enough to have his own damn money. You might be a legal adult, but it's still kinda sketchy. Has he paid you back yet? Make sure he pays you back.

Thirdly it's completely inappropriate for him to be oogling you and making comments on how short your shorts are, and whether or not you are wearing a bra! I'm relatively sure from what you have shared in your post that he's most likely attracted to you which is completely in appropriate, and very disrespectful of your mother. If I were you I would personally chose to wear longer shorts, not go braless, spend much less alone time with this guy, and certainly refrain from loaning him money.

Honestly, he sounds like a scumbag. Sorry, but Rosie gotta keep it at 100!😎

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- McBean
  
  5 years ago
  
  I think the ball is in the OP's court. She sounds aloof, and also has a delicate maneuver to make. If she punches this guy, she is being disrespectful to her Mother. Social savvy beyond her abilities is called for. Herein is the problem space for advice that would help her. So suppress your aggressive tendencies, and tell all of us how to tell a creep to back off in a way that he will shrug off the next morning. We know you can do it; you reject creeps with class and grace here at IIN all the time.
  
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  - Anonymous Post Author
    
    5 years ago
    
    I just made an account to ask a question.
    
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- RamenNoodlemaster#5
  
  5 years ago
  
  someones got some sand up her disgusting feminist vagina... cough Rosie... he is just a regular guy. He did nothing inappropriate and is happy to have someone who cares about him in his life. I wouldn't worry, most guys are awkward like this.
  
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  - RoseIsabella
    
    5 years ago
    
    Hey asshole, you're taking this way too personal. Going out with someone, and having the hots for their daughter, or son is a scummy way to be. If my comments hurt or offend you then you probably need to change yourself, try to improve your character, and you won't be such a loser with such an awful personality.
    
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  5 years ago
  
  He's not married to her but they're engaged and getting married.
  
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  - RoseIsabella
    
    5 years ago
    
    Well, hopefully something will happen, and they won't get married, because that dirtbag is bad news.
    
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    - nikkiclaire
      
      5 years ago
      
      😂 He sounds like a winner to me!!
      
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      - RoseIsabella
        
        5 years ago
        
        Winner of the bullet to head lottery in my mind. 😎
        
        He's a piece of shit! 💩
        🤣🤣🤣
        
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        nikkiclaire
        
        5 years ago
        
        Sarcasm my dear.
        
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[Old Memory]

5 years ago

Smash everything onto his head and say: "You got till 5 o'clock".

Ok, seriously, he's obviously hitting on you. Eliminate any form of contact with this guy and convince your mom to do this too. He is taking advantage of you two.

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- RoseIsabella
  
  5 years ago
  
  Yes! He's probably some kinda con-man/predator type.
  
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[Old Memory]

5 years ago

You should tell your mother, the comments he is making about your shorts, and whether you are wearing a bra are totally inappropriate. If I was dating someone, and he was making those sort of comments about my 18 year old daughter I would want to know about it. We would not be dating any longer, but I would rather find out what he is like before we were married. A broken engagement is far less messy than a divorce. Also you don’t say how much money you lent him. If it’s like £100 or so you would obviously like it back, but if that doesn’t happen it’s not the end of the world, but if you are talking about a thousand or more you need to be asking what he’s doing about getting it back to you. Does your mum know about the money? If not then that’s something else you should talk to her about.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  5 years ago
  
  She knows about the money yes. And it was around 2 grand. He needed to fix his car. I really don't mind.
  
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  - RoseIsabella
    
    5 years ago
    
    Oh Hell no! What the fuck kinda loser guy has to borrow $2000 from a teenager? Twenty dollars if he pays you back in a couple of days, but $2000? WTF? Your Mom is clearly dating a scumbag. Does he do drugs, has he been to jail? Seriously, there's something wrong with that dude. If he needs that sort of loan he should go to a bank. If he's old enough to date your mother he should be old enough to have good credit!
    
    Stay away from this guy!
    
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  - [Old Memory]
    
    5 years ago
    
    You don’t mind now because you don’t need the money at the moment. At some point in the future you will mind. Maybe you want a deposit for a property, or you want to buy a car, or maybe you have a child of your own that you need to provide for. Get the money ASAP
    
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  - nikkiclaire
    
    5 years ago
    
    You will mind when they break up and he disappears. Get the money back before telling your Mom he wants to fuck you. As soon as the money is in your pocket expose this perv.
    
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Pumpurrnickel

5 years ago

Stay away from him and don't help him again.

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farkelu

5 years ago

You sound really cute. And it's perfectly natural for a man to be attracted to an attractive young lady. But if it goes any further, you need to tell someone that he's making you uncomfortable. I wouldn't suggest telling your mom, it will just cause a lot of friction and conflict. Tell an adult friend.

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sillygirl77

5 years ago

Why do you have a smiley face at the end of your post? It makes you seem creepy too!

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  5 years ago
  
  It's just a smile...
  
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Emokate

5 years ago

Scary. Be careful of him cause he may try something. You should tell your mom.

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- RoseIsabella
  
  5 years ago
  
  Yes!
  
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_confused_

5 years ago

Yes he is attracted to you, since you are an adult what you should do is just stay away from him

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Boojum

5 years ago

It's totally inappropriate for a father, step-father, or any other quasi-father figure to ogle a female member of the family, comment on the absence of a bra, or the sexiness of her clothing.

Guys always notice these things (even fathers), but the fact that he's said something suggests he has problems with boundaries and understanding what's socially acceptable. It's all in his head at the moment, but there's every possibility that it could become more than that if his inhibitions are lowered by booze or drugs.

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Mark92

5 years ago

Sounds like he really is into you, he might not have done anything yet but who knows what could happen, watch your back and keep a distance, best you talk to your mother about this if it gets too far...

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donteatstuffoffthesidewalk

5 years ago

slam his thumbs in a door and ask where yalls fuckin money is

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- RoseIsabella
  
  5 years ago
  
  Hell muthafuckin yeah!
  
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- Shackleford96
  
  5 years ago
  
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TruXhuAO4IY
  
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bigbudchonga

5 years ago

Be a good stepdaughter, ask your mum if she wants to do a threesome with him. It's just the courteous thing to do.

Seriously though so what, so long as he doesn't make a move. He's a guy we're horny for good looking girls, you can't help what you're attracted to. So long as he doesn't make a move then what does it matter. I mean what are you going to do, break up a family because he's attracted to you?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  5 years ago
  
  Something is fucking wrong with you tbh. I know you're probably joking but to me this is a serious situation and I need genuine advice. Please just get off my post if you're going to be an ass about it.
  
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  - bigbudchonga
    
    5 years ago
    
    Nah I'm sorry. "Be a good stepdaughter, ask your mum if she wants to do a threesome with him. It's just the courteous thing to do." Bullshit
    
    "Seriously though so what, so long as he doesn't make a move. He's a guy we're horny for good looking girls, you can't help what you're attracted to. So long as he doesn't make a move then what does it matter. I mean what are you going to do, break up a family because he's attracted to you?" Real talk. Just like gays can't help what they're attracted to, neither can straights a mans dick, he can't choose to get hard, he can choose to physically act on that, so long as he doesn't try and shag you then the world's still working as it should.
    
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lordofopinions

5 years ago

Not normal as far as I am concerned. Be ready for him to hit on you or try to seduce you.

If he is going somewhere alone and invites you along make some excuse for not going. If you find yourself in the situation where you are alone with this guy I would exit to a friend's place. Be safe!

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teendicksuckers

5 years ago

Suck his dick and give him some Pussy

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Pussy_Destroyer_69

5 years ago

You sound like you are into that. Think about your mother pls.

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- Mark92
  
  5 years ago
  
  Stop being such a douchebag, the poor girl seems to be in a real mess with her step dad creeping on her like that, and is askming for advice while you make such ridiculous jokes or are just too stupid to understand her post. Get a life dude!
  
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  5 years ago
  
  Into what?
  
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  - Pussy_Destroyer_69
    
    5 years ago
    
    Your stepfather.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      5 years ago
      
      God no.
      
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      - Mark92
        
        5 years ago
        
        Ignore him, he sounds like a troll...
        
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        Pussy_Destroyer_69
        
        5 years ago
        
        Excuse me? I demand an apology. I only troll in select ocasions.
        
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Iszzy123

5 years ago

Do you want him for your self?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  5 years ago
  
  Wdym?
  
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  - Iszzy123
    
    5 years ago
    
    what I mean is if he does find you attctive do you find him attictve and do you want to be with him dispite being with ur mom better you finger this out now and not when his married ur mom and you and him end up doing something i.e. Sleeping togther
    
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    - lordofopinions
      
      5 years ago
      
      I think you misenterpreted her post entirely. It sounded like she did was concerned about his actions and comments regarding her that he would miss her more than her mom if her mom and he split up. She has a right to be concerned.
      
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I think my stepdad is attracted to me