I want to feed a bird to my cat to make him a man

26 Comments

I'm serious. My cat has always been very timid. He gets startled at any sort of sudden noise, loud or soft. Even gets startled by random movements like my hand under the blanket. I think he had some traumatic experiences as a kitten. He's also neutered. So there's not much going for him. I still love the little guy. He's my buddy

He loves to watch look out the window and balcony, look at the birds and people moving. He especially loves the birds, but has become a little apathetic compared to before since he can't reach them. I want to capture a brown dove and give it to him. Part of me thinks he might even get scared of a bird, but then the noises that he makes and his fixed attention on the birds outside makes me think his natural instincts would take over.

I could leave him with the bird in my bathroom so it would be easier to clean in case it's a bloodbath. I'll have water, milk etc ready for him so in case he does feast on his prey, all that energy from the meal would be buffered and balanced.

is it normal to do this for him? Would it be cruel to the bird? Should I just get him a goldfish in a bowl instead? He could play with the fish, watch it, or eat it. But I feel that would be traumatic for the fish. Opinions?

Don't do that, that's so mean	30
Get him a bird, sure why not	13
Get him a fish instead	8
Get yourself a girlfriend	38

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Comments ( 26 )

howaminotmyself

9 years ago | pl

This is cruel. Just let your cat be. Scratch his ears, give him some catnip, and maybe keep him inside.

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VirgilManly

9 years ago

Try giving it a live Bald Eagle or other raptor.
That which doesn't kill it will only make it stronger.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Lol
  
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catsofharmony

9 years ago

Give him a chickadee for starters then move on to a morning dove then finalee give him a crow but first start with cooked chicken then chickadee. Good luck!

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wistfulmaiden

9 years ago

don't feed your kitty random birds/mice, he could get worms or icky parasites.
btw my cat doesn't eat my pet fish but he does drink the fishwater which is kind of gross.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Thats hilarious
  
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  - wistfulmaiden
    
    9 years ago
    
    Ive been thinking: if you let your cat mate with a girl cat and have babies THAT will make him a "man" more than eating any animals!
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      9 years ago
      
      Did you just return to this post after two weeks? Dang
      
      My cat's fixed. Pay attention! =P
      
      Though I could pretend to be a boy who needs to be made into a man, if the same idea stands for you and I. Wink wink
      
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Valentina

9 years ago

I think it's very thoughtful and nice of you to want to treat your cat but maybe he's looking outside the window not because he'd love to kill birds but also would like to explore nature. Imagine being forced to spent your whole life in an apartment. Also, I think a pigeon would be too big for a cat, a sparrow or mouse would be more suitable. But what are you going to do with the animal if he doesn't kill it? Letting him out into nature/ a garden or getting another cat for him to play with would be better options I think.

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Shackleford96

9 years ago

No, I don't think you should try and influence your cat to kill a bird in the manner you presented. If the cat would kill a bird, that's it's own choice. You should have no influence over it.

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[Old Memory]

9 years ago

Are you in a place where the cat cannot go outside?

I have 3 indoor/outdoor cats and they kill stuff on their own all the time.

Unless you live somewhere with a lot of traffic or cat dangers just let him outside and he will kill his own birds.

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thegypsysailor

9 years ago

Hey dude, if you can make your cat a man ANY WAY, then you are going to be one very, very rich son of a bitch. But the question is; why would you want to? If you aren't gay, wouldn't it be better to make your cat a girl? People have been trying to turn lead into gold for quite some time, but I think you may have figured out how to turn your cat into gold, figuratively, anyway.

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CountessDouche

9 years ago

Cats can get parasites from eating wild animals.

I also think you are anthropomorphizing.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Google says: "to attribute human form or personality to"
  
  You say it as if that's a bad thing
  
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  - CountessDouche
    
    9 years ago
    
    Oh lol, sorry. I just mean that your cat is not a little human in a fur suit. If you give your cat a bird, it will probably have a ball killing it slowly, but I don't think that it will effect your cat's overall psyche or create some kind of "sense of identity." It's a cat- it wants to eat and shit and play and get free back rubs- that is all.
    
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disthing

9 years ago

What a weird person you are, to have given this so much thought.

So what, your cat isn't the lion you want him to be. Why do you want some killing machine, anyway? Who wants a cat that kills birds and drags their lifeless bodies to the doorstep as 'an offering' every evening? Just be happy with the pet you've got.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  You either didn't read my post, or read it but couldn't understand it.
  
  Never did I imply I wanted to train him to be a killing machine. It was just one bird or fish. The natural habitat of felines is to hunt, right? Cat health and "bird cruelty" aside, is it really that outrageous to give a cat one taste of it's natural instinct?
  
  It's like a kid watches the ice-cream truck outside his window. He does it cause he's bored, or would really want an ice-cream. I want him to get an ice-cream cone, because the essence of being a kid means liking and wanting unhealthy and sugary things. It might have an effect on the cat, it might not. By giving him one icecream am I changing him? Am I making him a sugaraholic?
  
  I apologize if I've come across mean, but the ignorance in your last 4 lines rubbed me the wrong way. For future posters' sakes, I hope this deters you from making posts out of misinterpretation~
  
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  - disthing
    
    9 years ago
    
    Your post says 'to make him a man'. It doesn't say 'just to give him a treat'. Clearly you think by encouraging him to kill something, you'll have given him a 'right of passage', he won't be the timid kitten he used to be. That suggests to me you're not happy with how he is at the moment - you want him to be 'a man' instead.
    
    A cat's instinct to hunt is a residual part of their biological make-up. If a cat doesn't appear to have that or does and is unwilling to indulge it, why do you feel the need to encourage it?
    
    If the cat can't catch a dove by itself, what will catching one for it prove? What will it accomplish allowing a cat to kill a thing you already caught for it?
    
    If he doesn't have the confidence to catch a bird or a mouse by himself, never mind. Trapping one in a room for him just seems weird to me.
    
    Clearly you're very easily rubbed up the wrong way. No, this won't deter me - you only know you've misinterpreted something in hindsight. I'd rather post than not post.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      9 years ago
      
      Much much better post. More dual-perspective than slapping claims. But I have started losing interest and seriousness in this redundant debate, so I'll try to do this as quick as possible
      
      I see your "It doesn't say 'just to give him a treat"
      And I raise you my "I want to feed a bird" ... "Should I just get him a goldfish?"
      A bird. A goldfish. A! A = singular = one = neo = matrix = a test = testing = disthing (when pronounced with a south african accent)
      
      hence proved
      
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      - disthing
        
        9 years ago
        
        Well I see your shitty response and raise you garbled nonsense of equivalent value:
        
        Wtydsrdfyt67646tyfvdrtd565656ftyfdrttyfblargh
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        9 years ago
        
        How is that shitty?! I went from the point I was making to your username by using word association
        
        *grabs onto your legs and sobs*
        
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  - Sanara
    
    2 years ago
    
    I actually do get your point. Im not sure if it would improve your cats overall quality of life if it got to kill something on its own though. I think live feeding can be justified if it improves the animals life quality (physically or mentally) or of course if that's needed to get the animal to eat. It happens in nature literally all the time, and the way humans produce meat either way isn't cruelty free (if anything often worse due to conditions we keep animals in). But I don't think its generally needed for a cat, given how many keep them and only feed them bowl food, and a lot of the time they seem to be thriving. Do what you want here I think
    
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Spleenya

9 years ago

It's normal for cats to sit and watch things even if they don't want to eat them. Get him some dangling toys and put it near his perch

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  I dont need dangling toys I just roam around the house naked and my cat comes jumping after between my legs
  
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BlackTar

9 years ago

What utter bullshit! I agree with the poll, this guy needs to get a girlfriend.

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chp317

9 years ago

NEWS FLASH......YOUR CAT WILL NEVER BE A MAN!! THIS IS SO STUPID!

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I want to feed a bird to my cat to make him a man