I wish everyday ,constantly ,that i was a lesbian

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10 Comments

I dont understand men. I dont like male company.
Ive never slept with a man.
I have an anxiety disorder so the only explanation I can find is that it affects my sex drive in making me scared about too many things such as diseases, pregnancy and pain. I can't even take birth control because I have a migraine disorder and I refuse to ever use one of those birth controls you insert up your vag, i'd rather fucking end my entire fucking life. I don't even use tampons.
I have thought about dating women but I have never even had women friends. As strange as it sounds i've only had guy friends. Ive kind of settled for male company, as an anxious person ive had no luck making friends and have instead settled for those who just came to me.
I have now finally made a woman friend. She's bisexual but she has a boyfriend yet she's sort of flirty with me but I ignore it because I don't want any mess in my life. It's very nice to hang out with a woman. There's no fragile masculinity to be wary of. She also gets anxiety about sex as shes felt the same way and doesnt think sex is so amazing so its nice to have someone who gets it. She does poledancing though surprisingly, because her boyfriend talked her into it smh... Shes sent me videos of her practicing it.
I am currently talking to a man ive dated in my past. Hes always had a massive thing for me. I eventually figured why not because hes romantic, smart, kinda rich and he cares. I like him but last time it didnt work because I refused intimacy and had no explanation. Now he's asked me out and he's already talking about the future too. He probably thinks i'm more experienced nowadays. I am attracted to him but at the same time I cannot imagine having straight sex. I love my idea of a future with him so I hope that I have changed suddenly when I see him again soon... I have to hope. I feel like my vibe has changed though, people seem to view me as someone who could not be straight, but the guy im talking to I dont think hes one of them. Hes always only wanted to see his idea of me. I called him out on that even when we stopped dating 2 years ago. I dont care at this point though. I have my idea of him too. Maybe thats whats necessary to get through a relationship with a man.

Voting Results
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Based on 6 votes (3 yes)
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Comments ( 10 )
  • raisinbran
    9 months ago | pl

    Your block of text is like being hit in the face with a brick.

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    • Anonnet
      9 months ago

      Agreed, and I read the whole post. There was a lot of rambling. Don't worry, though, SkullsNRoses has it under control.

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    • litelander8
      9 months ago

      I got through the first few sentences and gave up.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 months ago

      Awww I hope you get help for your attention deficit disorder

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  • SkullsNRoses
    9 months ago

    You realise you don’t have to date? Regardless of your sexuality you’re allowed to take a step back and work on yourself. There’s no point at all in forcing a relationship with a man you’re not compatible with, you’re not just wasting your own time but his as well.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 months ago

      Ive done that the last 3 years except last year I tried with someone again but he wasnt my type even I was just being nice because when I tried to dump him everytime he got upset. It makes no difference im turning older now and want commitment at this point

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      • SkullsNRoses
        9 months ago

        It’s normal to have the goal of a committed relationship but you don’t seem to know what you want or who you’re attracted to. The fact that you’re so detached from yourself that you can’t even bring yourself to touch your own vagina says on its own that you’re not ready to be in a relationship. As the saying goes “If you can’t love yourself how the hell are you going to love somebody else?”

        Focus on your personal goals, friendships and reconnecting with your body before you focus on dating.

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  • Jaylawrence
    9 months ago

    You have to do whatever you want to do that makes sense to you and makes you happy . I didn't know it at first but after being with my ex wife and we used to have great sex she started using a strap on dildo on me at first it was not nice and after awhile I liked it. So if you want to be with a woman then do so

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  • bigbudchonger
    9 months ago

    > Posts about being the most fragile person in the world
    > Unironically uses the term "fragile masculinity"

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  • Tommythecaty
    9 months ago

    It would be no different being with a woman. All the same issues exist.

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