Is it normal fetish for getting high on dope / overdosing
I’ve shot H since I was 19, I’m 25 now. Never got hooked or addicted it’s like an activity I do once or twice a week, doesn’t effect my day to day, it’s my “going to the bar” at the end of the work week. I keep a job, working on my masters, all that bullshit so ya don’t take me for a junkie bum.
I used to just smoke it or snort it until I was like 22 and it was a party thing but now it’s super intimate. Changing from pipe to injecting really kicked it as a sexual thing, the whole ritual drives me fuckin wild.
Shooting alone, taking a bit too much and dredging through the house, stumbling, vomiting, just being a depraved and overdosed fuck, it’s heaven, that’s where my kink is.
Anyway. I fell in love with a nursing student and I wanna marry her and have kids and whatever and I know I shouldn’t be doing what I’m doing.
But I’m worried I’m going to lose something that gets me off so intensely and Ill end up constantly craving it again.