Is it normal getting attacked by my elderly dad the police will not listen

33% Normal
6 Comments

I can't put him in a nursing home none of the good ones will take him because he is so violent and the dr says their is nothing wrong with him. He is beating me up and charging at me. I am really afraid he is going to kill me. but when the police come they warn me that next time they are going to put me in jail.it is insane. If I leave and do nothing I will be put in jail for neglect. he cries and tells them I beat him up which isn't true. I did shake him off me one day because he had his hands around my throat.

Voting Results
33% Normal
Based on 18 votes (6 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • thegypsysailor
    8 years ago

    You need to go to your local elderly care services offices (whatever they call them where you are) and get some help and advice. There are plenty of programs where you can get in home care, see specialists and advice. Obviously your doctor is out of his/her depth; you need a specialist in elder care.

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    • CountessDouche
      8 years ago

      We had the same problem with my grandma, once she was in the later stages of dementia; she became extremely physically aggressive because she did not want to take her medication, and she wanted to walk up and down the stairs in spite of multiple falls and broken bones. Unfortunatly, as a matter of policy, home care nurses will absolutely not work with someone once they become physically abusive, and it's impossible to find any in home help with someone who is in that state. I ended up having to take care of my grandmother myself until we could place her in a facility.

      Op, you'll have to get your father placed in a care facility, which I know from personal experience is a heartbreaking decision to make. It's a horrible feeling to take away the last shred of independence from an elderly relative, especially one that you love and respect and care for, but if your dad is attacking you, that might be your only option.

      Id recommend seeking a second opion from another doctor; aggressive and erratic behaviour like that is not normal, and a sign of a bigger problem.

      If it's a problem of him resisting, you can have him declared incompetent once he is diagnosed, and if you keep careful records of his behaviour. If you HAVE to prove that he is behaving erratically, I'd recommend setting up a camera in the house to substantiate your claims.

      If it's a problem of you not being able to afford a nursing home, you have a few options, free care being one of them, but none of them very are good.

      Either way, you can contact social services and have them observe the environment at home, this way the police will be aware that his claims of abuse are not true and you won't deal with any legal consequences.

      I'm sorry you're going through this. I've been there, and I know from experience how hard it is. I wish you luck.

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      • RoseIsabella
        8 years ago

        Hell muthafuckin' yeah!

        *when you read this please imagine Samuel L. Jackson's voice.*

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      • Steve2
        8 years ago

        Why put up with any of that dangerous behaviour? If I were you, I wouldn't have spent my valuable time attempting to control a demented old woman. You don't have to waste your life on such unimportant things, you know?

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  • Anewbis
    8 years ago

    Two words:

    Nanny Cam. Get evidence of the abuse on film and your case will have to be looked into.

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  • Mack1976
    8 years ago

    Hey just move leave you have free will just leave town don't look back you have no obligation to anyone in life unless you want it . except child support but your dad is a grown man you can go where you want no court in there right mind would tell you you have take care of anyone other than your child .

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