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I perform way better at work when I am drunk or have at least a little alchohol in my system. The problem is I have severe anxiety and can not express my emotions well. My freind thinks I have ptsd which would make sense. What should I do about this?
That's really unhealthy and could easily turn into alcoholism. Plus it's just a coping mechanism, it's not trying to fix your problems properly. You should go talk to a counsellor about your anxiety and start trying to work through it. Make it a new year's resolution.
I highly suggest that you get counseling.
The alcohol making you perform better at work is only temporary; and it will degrade into making you less effective at work, and likely ultimately getting fired.
You need to address your mental health and resolve things enough to live a more normal life such that you do not need alcohol as a crutch.
Please note that unfortunately, it often takes 2-3 attempts to find the right counselor to take you through the entire process, although most any of them will be able to assist you with the basics.
I wish you well with this,
If you continue like this, you will also need alcohol to start the day at all. What starts with a few drinks a week ends with a badly damaged liver and a craving that you can't stop on your own without help.
I have often had a level of 3.0 up to 3.8 per mille for a long time, all day long. I didn't go to the doctor about it, I don't even want to know how my organs were damaged by it. At that time, I functioned neither with nor without alcohol. I can say that I'm pretty out of shape and I feel anything but good. It has exacerbated my other illnesses.
I have been clean for a few months now. You can't count me among the top class of alcoholics, but I definitely had a strong tendency and was sick.
It's better to seek psychological help and, if necessary, psychiatric treatment. Alcohol is not a permanent solution to your problems. It will take you to hell in the worst case.
There is medication to calm anxiety.
That is better than turning yourself into an alcoholic.
It depends on your job, but if your job isn't something that requires you to be sober for safety reasons then although it's risky I think you can function like that. I function drunk myself a lot as well.