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A friend asked me what my room looked like and I took a pic but then got worried he would never see me the same way again so I didn't send it
You should get in the habit of doing a daily quick clean, a list of a few tasks you do every day like make the bed, put all trash in the can, do the dishes, organize stuff you got out during the day, and put your laundry in the hamper. Then once a week do more thorough cleaning like dusting, vacuuming, mopping and washing the sheets and clothes.
I let things get totally out of control at my house to the point that I couldn't possibly imagine having someone over. The thing is though, people don't really care about a mess I've found. This one time this girl I knew came over totally unexpectedly and I was humiliated. I mean my place was mentally ill kind of bad in how messy it was. She made out with me on the couch anyhow. I couldn't believe it. Other friends of mine don't give a shit about the mess either and they don't even comment on it. So keep that in mind. People aren't always as judgmental as we make them out to be.
Can't tell if you're over-anxious about normal "lived-in" mess, or your place really is a hoarder's paradise.
People don't mind the odd bit of clutter. A few dishes in the sink is fine. But if it would take more than 1 hour (say) to spruce up the main room/s to a comfortable level of tidiness, then maybe you do have a mess problem. If so, just dive in and try get on top of it.