Is it normal i dont know how to not be a slob nowadays

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10 Comments

When i was younger i was always a little messy but still overall a clean and normal organized person.

But now i am mid 20's live on my own and for years i feel like a dirty slob. I cannot figure out how to be a clean person.

I try so hard to keep things clean, to keep kitchen clean and floor clean and clothes clean and bathroom clean. But it all requires more energy than i have in a day. So the kitchen stove always has lots of crumbs on it. The sink always has a bunch of dirty dishes piling up. My clothes are sometimes musty or wrinkled. The floor has dustballs, hairs, and specs of dirt

I look at other peoples homes and they seem so clean and fresh and spotless, but even when I try my hardest my place still has a slob feel to it. i dont understand what i am doing wrong??

Voting Results
73% Normal
Based on 48 votes (35 yes)
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Comments ( 10 )
  • Ellenna
    8 years ago

    If it bothers you, clean it up, if not, not.

    I also live alone and have for many years. Occasionally, usually when I'm extra busy or not well or depressed clutter piles up and it all gets a bit grotty, so I play mind games with myself.

    For example, I will now put 10 (or 20 or whatever I feel like) items where they should be, or I will wash 20 of these dirty dishes, or clean one small section of the kitchen, while telling myself I don't have to do it all right now. What invariably happens is that I keep going because I enjoy the satisfaction of actually doing something about the mess.

    Alternatively, you can decide that for 15 minutes a day at a specific time you will do some cleaning up.

    I have a medical condition with wildly fluctuating energy levels so I do what I can when I can and leave it when I can't, or just do little bits at a time until I get tired, then rest and do another little bit. There's no intrinsic virtue in tidiness but I do aim for a reasonable level because I hate wasting energy looking for things.

    If you really want to change this you will when you're ready

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      8 years ago

      Maybe i did not explain correctly. Your advice is solid but that is not really my problem. My issue is that even when i have the motivation and energy to clean and de-clutter, etc., my best still feels a bit cringeworthy compared to most people's normal. Even if i have done pretty much everything, clean the floors, wipe the countertops, vacuum, wash dishes, etc etc... my space still sort of has a slightly dirty/slob feel to it.

      Maybe it has something to do with the fact that i am not seeing all the problems most of the time. For example i might think i am doing everything but still missing subtle stuff like wiping the cupboards or dusting the tops of a few things, or wiping fingerprints off the refrigerator. All of these together must lead to a less-than-clean feel even when i think i have taken care of the big stuff. I can only speculate that for most people taking care of all these other subtle things just come naturally throughout the day but not for me anymore, for some unknown reason.

      For example, I had a girl over some months ago for a night. I made sure to tidy up and clean up my apartment so that i could feel more comfortable knowing it looked alright. I did my best to wipe the stovetops of crumbs and stains, etc. To me, it looked good. But then when she arrived she pointed out that the stovetop looked dirty, without me even bringing it up in the first place. I was so confused and embarrassed. It left me feeling so inadequate. I feel like my best just isnt good enough and i am not sure what to do,

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      • Ellenna
        8 years ago

        I haven't known many people in my long long life with perfectly clean tidy homes, except maybe my mother and people who can afford cleaners.

        That girl sounds like a pain in the arse: what does it matter if your stove top looks dirty? Were you going to fuck her on it????

        Some people just have unrealistically high standards for other people: don't do that to yourself! Clean and tidy as much as is worth your time, energy and satisfaction and leave the rest. You're far too hard on yourself: what you call the subtle stuff isn't important, fingerprints & a bit of dust never hurt anyone. I've lived in a shed and a caravan and in the endless dust of the Australian outback, so I guess my standards are fairly realistic, plus I have more important things to put energy into: anyone who criticises my housekeeping standards isn't worth bothering with

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      • rightkindofpasta
        8 years ago

        I agree with Ellena. That girl's acting like an ass. It seems like she's the one with the problem, not you. My friends always have dirty dishes soaking in their sink and crumbs on their counters; no one's said a damned thing about it. I wouldn't worry too much if your place really isn't all that dirty. No reasonable person should mind a few dust bunnies or fingerprints.

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  • Darkoil
    8 years ago

    Use paper plates and plastic cups then you can just throw them straight out and don't have to worry about washing up.

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    • Ellenna
      8 years ago

      Oh yeah great for the environment!

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  • RoseIsabella
    8 years ago

    Ugh, this makes me think of my own struggle with clutter, and causes me to wonder if I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I also have sleep apnea, but my CPAP mask has been broken since last December and my high blood pressure medication makes me tired too.
    :-'(

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  • TheCockRoach
    8 years ago

    OP I know exactly what you mean. I have hardwood floors and battle with dust and should literally sweep daily with a dust mop. So what I do is buy door mats for outside and and inside just before and after entrance and exit.

    You'll also want to use a high MERV rating air filter. I use a 4 inch thick 18. You'll also want to get a HEPA air purifier. Put your dishes directly into the washer and don't use the sink etc.

    That chick mentioning the dirty stove top with out you asking makes me thing you are a fucking hopeless SLOB SOB and the older you get the harder it will be to change your ways.

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  • thegypsysailor
    8 years ago

    I guess mommy didn't follow through and make sure you did it, after she told you to take a bath and clean your room? Too bad.

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  • sexysonofsam
    8 years ago

    Clean as you mess, that way things would not "pile up" on you.

    See the solution to being clean is easy!

    Being poor cannot be helped, but being clean sure can!

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