Is it normal i dropped my homeless freind?

82% Normal
12 Comments

So I met this person in the homeless shelter when I was living there. I lived at the shelter for a month, than got a job and housing and got out as quickly as possible. This freind was there for 6 months trying to get a housing voucher and left 3 weeks after I left the shelter. I kept trying to convince them to find housing but they said they would rather live in thier car since they would eventually get a housing voucher. They also were interested in me but don't seem interested in finding housing. I after moving out lost my housing becuase the leaser(I was subleasing) didn't pay rent. Aftet which I stayed with a different freind who owns a house and paid them to sleep in thier guest bedroom for a month and a half. Now I live in an apartment with a 6 month lease and live in an actual apartment complex(I moved in two weeks ago). This person trying to get a housing voucher still live out of thier car. I kind of don't want to associate with this person anymore if they really don't want to get thier stuff together and I defiantly don't want to date someone living in the streets. Am I wrong for cutting them out of my life?

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82% Normal
Based on 11 votes (9 yes)
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Comments ( 12 )
  • LloydAsher
    2 years ago

    Associate with who you want. Drop them if they dont share your values. Doesnt mean you are a crappy person.

    Heck I dropped a snapchat friend as soon as he said he was a socialist. Not because he was a socialist. But when I asked about the finer points in how socialism would work his answer was to kill those who opposed. That was a non answer and a good way to get unfriended.

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  • sweetone89
    2 years ago

    I lived in a homeless shelter for 6 months and became friendsmwith an older lady (50s). I was in my early 30s. She had many problems and didn't want to work on solutions.

    I had to let her go. I don't have a job because of COVID-19 but I live in an apartment now, on unemployment and rental assistance. But that is all going to change as soon as spring comes. I am going to find work. I never want to experience homelessness again.

    And don't take thisnperson in out of pity unless they are willing to pay half the rent and utilities. But remember, it is hard to legally ditch them if you take them in, especially during COVID-19.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      2 years ago

      I have my own apartment. Meaning they can not live here. The apartment is rented to me. I tried convincing them rent an apartment with me before but they always said they needed a voucher so couldn't do that. So I did offer them to be my roommate in the beginning but despite having a job was very against it.

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  • olderdude-xx
    2 years ago

    It's hard to move on... but move on you must if you are going to get ahead in the world.

    Many people chose to stay where they are for a variety of reasons.

    There is no shame on your part for moving on without them. You did your reasonable best in offering them to move on with you.

    Please go find some new friends who will encourage you to keep moving forward.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      2 years ago

      This freind came back and wont go away. What do I do?

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      • olderdude-xx
        2 years ago

        If it has already not happened: Don't let them move in, not even for a single night (people like this are very difficult to remove once they are in your dwelling). You need to be able to tell them that you are not interested in them anymore... and that they should go back to the shelter to find help again (see more comments at the end of this post).

        If they have already moved in then you need to kick them out. People from the homeless shelter may be able to assist with that. Other friends, etc. The police will do it if you have no other help (and will likely take him to a homeless shelter).

        There are people in this world that will leach off of you forever if you let them; and they have no desire to improve themselves.

        You have to be strong and kick them out, and make it clear that you do not want to associate with them.

        IF they ask you why? Tell them that you tried to assist them to do better in life... and you turned that offer down. You have no further interest in them after that. You are only looking for people who clearly demonstrates that they wish to improve themselves and stand on their own (and not leach from others). That would be an honest answer.

        If after being kicked out, or told to stay away they continue to bother you; there are several choices: Restraining order (which they may not follow) or to move to another location - and they do not know where you are (Talk to your landlord about this - oftentimes they have multiple properties or know of other landlords that may be able to assist in such a transition).

        I wish you the best,

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          2 years ago

          Can I get a restrianing order if I do not have thier full name? They keep leaving viocemails saying streets they saw me on. I keep blocking thier number but they do not want to leave me be. They can not move into my new place. I am the one on the lease, not them.

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          • olderdude-xx
            2 years ago

            You can identify the issue to the police and ask them to talk to him (call the non-emergency number). Most police departments will do so although it may take a few days. The police can also then likely provide you with his full name and likely address.

            They may also be able to provide other suggestions that are appropriate to your local community (different communities have different resources).

            I'd also suggest that you change your phone number - and do not leave a forwarding number. You can notify your friends, family, employer, etc. of the new number after you get it.

            Keep a positive attitude... and if nothing else works... just ignore him.

            Remember to Love, Laugh, and Live Life....

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