Is it normal i'm confused whether it's a bad idea or not?

18 Comments

I met a person offline on an anonymous chatting site over a year ago now. It feels like I've known her way longer though because she's helped me through hard times!
We are both F and became really close Internet friends. We are basically world's apart but we had a plan which was to one day hopefully go traveling together.
Her and I were not financially sound and still aren't.
These past 4-6 months (I'm guessing ) she's gone quite distant as she rarely replies to me anymore but I also don't talk to her a lot. I have over the past few weeks however, been trying to see how she is.
I understand she's going through a rough patch but I wish she'd talk to me every now and again. She says she distances herself from people when she's going through crap but unfortunately sure she doesn't ignore everyone around her like she does with me.
My main concern is, is it a bad idea to go to her country to travel together? She says she still wants me to go over.
I just think it's a bad idea considering she doesn't even talk much anymore to me?
I have a desire to go traveling but I'm also afraid..

I worry about my mum and how she'd cope with her business as we work together. I worry I could get sick when in a different country and I also am great at over thinking and have bad anxiety. :(
I just want to do things like travel but I am not sure I can ?
Is it a bad idea to go see my friend in the future if I become financially okay?
I guess I don't really know her either come to think of it since I haven't Met her in RL

Good idea!	1
Bad idea	3
She's not a good friend anymore so I'd forget it	3
other	1
I think that'd be too stressful	0
Maybe	4

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Comments ( 18 )

Wtf055

6 years ago

Just make sure you're safe in any choice you make (: goodluck with your decision.

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[Old Memory]

6 years ago

Different country? That is how you get kidnapped and sold as a sex slave. Don't go that's a terrible idea

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  oh *sighs* It'd be more safe if I took off with someone from my own country wouldn't it. Actually she just messaged me the other day saying she's gotten a job and is going to work her ass off and then come see me in a year or so. .not sure if she's just saying that tho
  
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  - [Old Memory]
    
    6 years ago
    
    I'm saying don't go and see someone that you've never met in person, and with all the cases of girls being kidnapped while seeing someone they thought they knew I thought it was worth mentioning
    
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Ellenna

6 years ago

You don't really know this person and travelling to another country on the basis of an on again, off again online "friendship" would be a really stupid and potentially dangerous thing to do.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  okay thanks for informing me
  
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rayb12

6 years ago

There's like many things going on here. You have to learn how to break these things down and be rational. There are a few unrelated pieces.

The first if we wanna start here is you having enough money to go. I personally travel extremely cheap, but a plane ticket at least is necessary. So before you can get this money the rest is irrelevant.

The second is your moms business, we don't have enough info but you maybe could speak to her about making that work.

Then there is you traveling in general, which is unrelated from this person, so you have to overcome this anxiety you have about getting sick so you can go do what you want to.

And then finally is this person and this will be different whenever you leave on your trip. I mean what terms you will be on then. I think its most important that you're comfortable traveling alone in case it doesn't work out with them. Of course you are never alone for long when traveling, especially in a foreign country and especially as an English speaker. And if you really don't trust this person at the time then don't see them at all. Trust your gut. But don't let them stop you from going and traveling.

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- rayb12
  
  6 years ago
  
  Also I did not mean to discourage like having worries, not enough money, family obligations, are barriers to keep you from this. These can all quickly be taken care of.
  
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Pink-pumpkin

6 years ago

Why does you story sound like my story? :O I built a very solid friendship online with a girl of my age, who lives in another country. We also plan to see each other one day, travel together and we are pretty much in the same situation. We don't talk everyday but we are still very close.... But I know her and trust her because she gave me genuine information about herself. In your case I'm not sure, I wouldn't travel alone.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  What country are you traveling from? :)
  
  Also I'm Facebook friends with the girl that wants to travel together and I spoke to her once on the phone. She's also tagged in quite a few pictures and has a lot of pictures up so I believe she's legit...
  
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  - Pink-pumpkin
    
    6 years ago
    
    Yeah, well we met on a forum because we liked trolling a lot. lol and now we keep contacting each other on Facebook. We never talked on the phone but she sent me vocal messages a few times. She lives in France and we both speak french. I don't think I'm going to travel anytime soon, I don't have the time and money for it. But one day I should really meet her :). She wants to start a project with me in the future, it's gonna be an internet app where we sell stuff lmao I'm not sure about that but it's okay :p
    
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Nickvey

6 years ago

if you met a person on a chatting site it was on-line not off line . going on vacation with people you have never met is a recipe for complete disaster for one of the two.

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- Ellenna
  
  6 years ago
  
  Or both!
  
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[Old Memory]

6 years ago

Talk more to her before you travel to meet her.
It's a bit risky since you can't really know if she is being 100% honest with you.

I trusted and loved someone I met online and she even proposed to me, but a few months later, when I was going thru some bad times, she cut me off completely. And made me feel I was guilty for her abandoning me. She almost destroyed me.

Be careful.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  I'm so sorry you went through this! ! Thanks for the advice!
  
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CDmale4fem

6 years ago

If you decide to go, I would make sure you talk to her before you go. If you go without talking to her, what if she's off on another "walkabout" as Crocodile Dundee would say. What if she's not around For you to meet up with. You should really make some sort of confirmation before you go. Smart choice. Have you seen the movie "Taken" ?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  Yes I have seen the movie for sure
  
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  Good point - Advice taken :)
  
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Are You Normal?

Is it normal i'm confused whether it's a bad idea or not?