Is it normal i think i might be bi or lesbian but i cant tell
Sometimes I feel like im bi. Even my mom has asked me am I bi and my ex think so. I easily befriend men while im very intimidated by other women.
My explanation for this is girls were mean to me growing up so thats why im intimidated by women now but I have questioned my sexuality since I am happy being with a man platonically and thats it.
Ive never been interested in sex. At least not with men. I've thought I was sexually attracted to various men but once they start touching on me and kissing me I am grossed out. Only with 1 man ever have I not been grossed out by intimacy and that was my first bf and being lonely I just think I was very caught up in finally having someone and having achieved my goal of getting a boyfriend especially since he was popular-ish. I cant deny I enjoyed the attention of being on his arm even though he was kind of a jerk. Looking back it was a big reason for staying with him. Of course I was in love too.
I have always been very drawn though to the idea of having a boyfriend. Sort of like when I was a teen and was very drawn to the idea of running a blog which was a popular thing to do then. It's one of those things that I would like to cross of my list but everyone I meet is wrong.
But how can I tell that what I desire from a woman isnt just friendship? I have no female friends after all.
I have had two female crushes in recent years which isn't many but to be fair i'm not around women a lot because i'm a loner.