Is it normal people are fishing for compliments?

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6 Comments

People i know are often fishing compliments from me. Like once i was visiting my mother, her boyfriend made a cake. After we had eaten it, he asked me to judge by the scale 1-10 how good his cake was. I said it was a 10 (but i really felt it was a 7). He laughed satisfyingly and bragged about it to my mother. I had to make a white lie to not disappoint him. Another time an old friend of mine was drunk and sent a text message claiming that i never complimented him under an argument. I was thinking what? what should i compliment him for? and some other time one of my ex boyfriends took his erect d*** out of his pants and said "Isn't it big?" i sighed and said "Uh...yeah" i felt rather annoyed because of a yet another fishing for compliments encounter i witnessed. I never felt the need to fish for compliments from people so i don't understand why so many people are fishing it from me. If i were to compliment someone then i would genuinely have to mean it and i do compliment people when it suits me. It's just strange to be asked for compliments. There are several other examples to this but i'm not going to write it all down. Let's just say this happens alot.

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73% Normal
Based on 22 votes (16 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • Nokiot9
    9 years ago

    Lol u should have said 'eh... I have seen way bigger.' And see how big it'd have stayed.

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  • WhiteStallion
    9 years ago

    The only thing that matters is being honest to yourself. I don't let people pressure me into giving compliments, in fact I give compliments to people with humility, who deserve it and I don't mince my words about how I really feel about something when someone explicitly asks my opinion. You don't owe them anything and you're doing great to realize that. There will always be conceited fishers out there, which makes it enjoyable putting them in their place.

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  • DangerousPotatoGuy
    9 years ago

    I can't help but see this a little differently. Say, do you give out compliments that often or do you do so when you feel it actually matters? (Yes, I've read through your post)

    See, sometimes when we give compliments it doesn't have to mean we actually mean it. At times its like trying to be generally nice or help boost someone's esteem or something. If you don't pass out compliments once or a couple times then people will go out fishing them from you

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      9 years ago

      Yes when we had eaten the cake i said it tasted good before he asked about the 1-10 scale. Another time i was asking a friend for a favor and this friend said "Yes i will, am i not a nice person?". I give compliments and i'm also polite.

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  • Avant-Garde
    9 years ago

    We are living in a culture that raises children to believe that they are entitled to things, compliments being one of them. They grow up into adults who think they are entitled to compliments. PRAISE! It's all very sad. You live around very insecure and ridiculous people. (Who gives out compliments when arguing?!)

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  • true?_blue?
    9 years ago

    I find that those fishing for compliments are the ones that deserve them the least. That is, if someone asks you "isn't it big", sets up a situation that is hard to react to negatively. This goes for the cake, too. The worst fishers are the ones that set you up to make an agreement _in front of_ important (relatively) people. The expected compliment that he receives is boosted that much more.

    This is so blatantly manipulative and is very uncomfortable for all involved.

    If I were you I'd respond neutrally like "that's nice"; "oh, didn't you ask me once before?"; "we'll talk it over later"; or the time-honored response "Yes, dear" (use as often as needed.

    I think the goal is to disarm the fisher on his first attempt to coral you into his net.

    You sound like you're confident with yourself, and that you love yourself. Please don't lose that, and don't let someone chip away at your honest core.

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