Is it normal relatives persist in wanting to see grandkid

he prefers them to me and talks about them too much.he calls them and talks to them for hours if I refuse to let him see them.Or they bring their hippie redneck asses to my house which I hate.The one relative is so fat and is single and is very unsuccessful All he has done is travelseen rock bands and had dead end jobs. What kind of role model is that for a child.I worry he does not have enough order in his life. That is what is wrong with America, we hug and coddle our kids too much. They refuse to follow the tiger mother parenting book and they give him gifts and act silly with him.I try and call when he is visiting them and demand they tell me what they are doing minute by minute. He needs order discipline and barked at like he is boot camp .Because that is what he is gonna do when he graduates.This is how the Chinese raise their kids. I don't think they ever let them play at all and their kids act like perfect adults.