Is it normal she randomly didn't want to know me anymore? :(

36% Normal

I met someone at work and we became friends sort of. She was one of the very few I liked actually as the rest were assholes!! To cut a long story short, we both ended up quiting that awful job at different times. I decided I wanted to become friends outside of work as I don't have many. We hung out twice but prior to that she initially added me on Facebook and we spoke all the time. Actually I was the one that would always message something, like something funny or work gossip and we would continue to talk for aaages ! I always offered/invited her to hang out maybe every 2 weeks or more I'd ask. After the second time, she got a bit weird and seemed distant and made an excuse not to hang. After not replying to me for over a good 2 weeks, I demanded that she at least tell me why we're not friends anymore (as I assumed). She said sorry for taking so long and that she doesn't feel a connection in our personalities etc! Was quite long what she wrote. However I don't get it!! Her bf said to me when I first met him that he'd heard a lot about me. It sounded cherry so I'm pretty certain that was a good thing. Was I too annoying? Too over the top ? Did I scare her away by always inviting her to hang ? :(
I was really hurt

Voting Results

36% Normal

Based on 33 votes (12 yes)

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Comments ( 30 )

Lifeistooshorttotakeseriously

8 years ago

You said it all here..."I decided I wanted to become friends out of work", "I was the one who messaged", "I invited her to hang", "I demanded to know". True friendship is a 2 way street. The only person seeing the relationship as a friendship here was you. There is a big difference between being friends and being work acquaintances. She is obviously a decent person if she sent a long response explaining why your coworker relationship would not translate into a friendship from her side. As for why? Sometimes it just is. We don't get to meet someone and say "I have decided you will now be my friend". Don't be hurt - just be the person you'd like to be friends with! Likes attract likes :)))

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  All correct however, few points to add;
  She continued conversation & we got along extremely well, also if I wasn't that interesting or likeable to her then why talk lots about me to her bf.
  .. He obviously heard a lot of good about me the way he said it and you dont just talk about someone a lot for the hell of it unless they were on your mind ?
  
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  - Lifeistooshorttotakeseriously
    
    8 years ago
    
    As an acquaintance she met through work you ARE likeable and interesting but she doesn't want to be friends. She didn't talk about you lots to her BF She mentioned you were a work colleague paying her attention. The BF telling you he knew all about you or had heard about you is his way of telling you that his GF hadn't kept you a secret. It's like if someone said to him 'you should put pine nuts in your salads. Here's a packet of pine nuts' his response would be 'oh thanks I've heard lots about that. They're supposed to be good. Hello pine nuts!' She is polite. He is polite. They have a trusting loving relationship with each other. End of.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      8 years ago
      
      Right...I see.
      Just for the record- They didn't have as an amazing relationship as you think. They aren't even together anymore. She was always mono anyway which used to ruin my buzz. Her loss in the end any how.
      
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      - Bake34
        
        8 years ago
        
        I was reading through before I posted but I was going to say it could have been her bf that felt threatened by you. Are you male? And the letter was to spare your feelings.
        
        I've dated guys in the past that tried to be controlling about who I was friends with. It was usually because they thought I would like the other guy better and leave them. In reality I left all of them for other reasons and all my friends are guys and always will be.
        
        *edit. I just read that you were a girl. My story still stands. Maybe he was just jealous about her making a new friend and she talked about you so much.
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        8 years ago
        
        Im a girl and yes I wish that were the case- like I would like to believe that's the reason why but I'll never truly know! Which sucks :/
        Then again I went and messaged him after not hearing from her for ages to see if he knew anything as to why she wasn't talking to me. He told me he didn't & that he'd find out. Finally after few weeks, she replies to me! I feel he did talk and encourage her to talk to me....
        
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      - Lifeistooshorttotakeseriously
        
        8 years ago
        
        It is indeed her loss. You seem like a very compassionate and dedicated person. I wish you all the best and hope you find who you are looking for. :)
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        8 years ago
        
        Thanks I appreciate that! Not many seem to think so, otherwise they would have stuck around :/
        
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mysistersshadow

8 years ago

Just sounds like you came on to strong and you can't expect every one you meet to want to be bffs. I wouldn't worry about it just be yourself and you'll find the friends that are for you.

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NathanScot

8 years ago

Reduce the theatrics,this is just a simple case of someone not feeling you the same way you are feeling them.That's all and its quite normal.Cher'

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  Are you on Reptile Keepers ?
  
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  - Anonymous Post Author
    
    6 years ago
    
    why no reply ?! Pussy
    
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Myghoul2099

8 years ago

when a girls boyfriend says something like "i heard alot about you!",what he means is "my girlfriend has orgasms to you often while i'm fucking her and i really resent you and please limit all contact with us."

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  ERM...I don't think so...I'm a girl
  
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  - Myghoul2099
    
    8 years ago
    
    i'm still right.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      8 years ago
      
      Maybe she liked me but I doubt it
      
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- Bake34
  
  8 years ago
  
  That's kind of where I was going with my comment. Lol
  
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Clone1990

8 years ago

maybe she wants her independence more than anything else. my aunt was almost in tears one night and was like" i don't want to hear it! i want my own house to myself!". some women just like their alone time.

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ActionBastard

8 years ago

Cuz you gotta stinky basket, ladies hate a stinky basket.

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Navilluschizo

8 years ago

Its probably because you didn't bring her a lemon.

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Wolverine99

8 years ago

she was rubbin her fuckin cunt to you boi

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  I'm a girl u idiot
  
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53739

8 years ago

People are opportunistic and selfish, don't feel bad, it's just human nature.

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RoseIsabella

8 years ago

Maybe it was all too intense and overwhelming for her?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  You think ? :/ dam I knew I should have backed off
  
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  - RoseIsabella
    
    8 years ago
    
    How many hours did ya'll typically spend together, and how often? Did you ever proclaim you undying friendship and loyalty to her or exclaim, "you're my best friend"? Most people feel uncomfortable, trapped and even suffocated when relationships move too fast regardless of whether it's a romantic relationship a platonic friendship.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      8 years ago
      
      No I never got that far
      
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      - Anonymous Post Author
        
        8 years ago
        
        I only saw her at work when we were rostered on but apart from that we only hung out couple times. We used to talk on a regular basis though, every 1-4 days
        
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Are You Normal?

Is it normal she randomly didn't want to know me anymore? :(