Is it normal that a fuckbuddy is falling for me?

83% Normal

So I've been having casual sex with this female so I can get any lust I have in my system out during my time in school. So shes gotten into the habit of texting me every day and ending most conversation drop offs with love. I do not intend to date her in any capacity. Any way I could curtail these feeling towards me and try to make it into more of a casual sex contract like it was originally. If not I could "dump" her but the work for finding another one it a pain in the ass and is to be avoided but not let go as an option.

Voting Results

83% Normal

Based on 48 votes (40 yes)

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Comments ( 111 )

CozmoWank

4 years ago | pl

OMG, sex with emotional attachment. What a novel idea.

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- Doesnormalmatter
  
  4 years ago
  
  What's that?
  
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  - CozmoWank
    
    4 years ago
    
    I do not know. We don't hear it mentioned much here in these IIN parts.
    
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    - Doesnormalmatter
      
      4 years ago
      
      Facts.
      
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- charli.m
  
  4 years ago
  
  Don't be so fucking disgusting.
  
  Signed,
  A Female
  
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  - CozmoWank
    
    4 years ago
    
    I was being sarcastic.
    
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    - charli.m
      
      4 years ago
      
      Surely not...
      
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      - Anonymous Post Author
        
        4 years ago
        
        You females are confusing creatures.
        
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        charli.m
        
        4 years ago
        
        So are you retards.
        
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      - CozmoWank
        
        4 years ago
        
        ???
        
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        charli.m
        
        4 years ago
        
        ...did you genuinely not get that I was just continuing the sarcasm while mocking the tard OP? :/ ofc you were being sarcastic. It's one of my favourite things you do. Why would anyone not retarded read it any other way?
        
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  She has the emotional attachment not me.
  
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Holzman_67

4 years ago

It’s likely your cold dissonance is actually attracting her more

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  She did like my cold stare into her eyes during missionary. Idk how female attraction works.
  
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Doesnormalmatter

4 years ago

Lol this sounds familiar! Tell her straight up! Say we agreed to just be fuck buddy's, now don't be so clingy!

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  So just straight up. Not softening the blow over a few weeks of hitting it so when I do kick her out of my life she wont straight up stab me?
  
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  - Doesnormalmatter
    
    4 years ago
    
    No, no and no. Don't kick her out of her life, just reaffirm her position in the FWB zone.
    
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  - Ellenna
    
    4 years ago
    
    There are ways of doing this which don't involve concepts as hitting it, kicking or stabbing!
    
    Just tell her politely that it's not working for you now she's become emotionally attached and that it'd be better for both of you if you end it. Simple.
    
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Boogienights

4 years ago

"finding another one" You sound like a pig. If youre so messed up that you cant cope getting involved with people then you really shouldnt have sex with them or go to a prostitute. You like so many men have an unhealthy avoidant attachment style.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  But a prostitute would be too expensive long term.
  
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  - Boogienights
    
    4 years ago
    
    Then dont have sex. Sex isnt like food. You dont actually need it.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      4 years ago
      
      Yeah but it's fun and the original no strings attached arrangement was a mutual one. She starts putting strings on it and I'll sever the agreement.
      
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      - Boogienights
        
        4 years ago
        
        Youll end up a lonely old man
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        4 years ago
        
        Hardly if it gets to that point there are aplenty of old females who dont want to die alone.
        
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momwatcher69

4 years ago

You ought to be ashamed of yourself, but that's not the kind of boy, you are.

What losers, like you, fail to understand, is that women aren't on this earth, for douches, like you.

When you figure out how to respect women, you "might" become a man !!

What's REALLY PATHETIC, is you're so lazy, you can't afford to be honest, with her, because then you'd have to look for another female, to masturbate inside of....

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  I'm doing the most efficient move for myself right now. I'm am still looking for a girlfriend but the person I'm having sex with is a conduit for us both to get the sex out of our systems. It's a mutual agreement and she is developing feelings. I'll remind her on my standings and if she doesnt want to have sex anymore I'll accept it... it takes two to tango.
  
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  - momwatcher69
    
    4 years ago
    
    So, she's not "good enough" to be girlfriend material, but she IS "good enough" to be a piece of meat ?
    
    Your sentence: "I'm doing the most efficient move for myself right now" truly describes the self-centeredness, of your personality. You have NO personal integrity.
    
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    - [Old Memory]
      
      4 years ago
      
      Personality compatible and bodily compatibility are two separate things that may or may not overlap.
      
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      4 years ago
      
      Shes using me as a piece of meat. So what's the problem? That was to original agreement, to use eachother to get off.
      
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      - momwatcher69
        
        4 years ago
        
        Bottom line: If you think she is having more than "fuck buddy" feelings, you should remind her of your 'agreement'.
        
        I''m not sure how 2 people can have continued sexual contact, and NOT have some feelings. Sounds a bit robotic, to me. Wham-bam-Thank-you-Ma'am.
        
        I know animals do this, but humans?! Whatever !!
        
        Since most women don't orgasm, during intercourse, what is SHE getting out of this ?! ....... the pleasure of being treated like a "hole"?
        
        P.S. Is there a reason why you can't "get off" alone, so nobody's feelings get hurt? . . or. . .Why don't you (pay) for a hooker, who does this for a living, with no emotion(s)?
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        4 years ago
        
        Shes orgasming a half dozen times during our sessions. 6/1 orgasms is a good ratio. Shes definitely getting something out of the arrangement.
        
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Rabblt

4 years ago

This is normal but ai really cringe at you calling women "females"

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- momwatcher69
  
  4 years ago
  
  When I don't know the age, there's a difference between women, and females. All women are females, but not all females are women (21+)
  
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  Why its correct. I call men males.
  
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- LloydAsher
  
  4 years ago
  
  Could be because the OP was in the military or something before hand.
  They use male and female frequently enough to be engraved in general speech.
  
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  - charli.m
    
    4 years ago
    
    No, OP, you're just on the incel track.
    
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    - LloydAsher
      
      4 years ago
      
      -_- I'm not the OP though.
      
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      - charli.m
        
        4 years ago
        
        Dude. Seriously. That's possibly the dumbest thing you've said on this thread. And there's a shitload of competition.
        
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ellnell

4 years ago

Be honest about the fact that you have no romantic feelings for her... It's best so you don't lead her on and hurt her more. And stop sleeping with her or she'll keep hoping you'll feel the same.

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randypete

4 years ago

This is normal.

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freedom_of_sex

4 years ago

This is normal.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  Happen a lot to you?
  
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  - freedom_of_sex
    
    4 years ago
    
    Yeah.
    
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DIO

4 years ago

Be clear with her. Tell her you like her as a friend and enjoy what you do in bed with her but you don't want more and are not in love.
If you say it nicely and with sincerity, I think she should understand.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  Liking her as a friend would imply that we would be actual friends outside of the casual sex. While she shares a few of my interests and political affiliation her personality is crap and work ethic is terrible. A long term relationship would not be in my best intrest.
  
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  - DIO
    
    4 years ago
    
    Well, she's giving you her body, you have to give her at least something. Friendship should be the least.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      4 years ago
      
      Theres a transaction here. I'm getting laid, shes getting laid. Why is it all on me to give her 60% when she gives me 50%. I dont have to one up her when it's this simple of a transaction.
      
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      - DIO
        
        4 years ago
        
        No, it's not.
        You're having a sex friend and you want it. Do you think it would be hard for her to find another one than you? It is way harder for a guy to find a descent one that for a girl. Therefore she is giving you more since she could find someone else in the blink of an eye but you can't.
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        4 years ago
        
        Me finding the one is going to be very hard. You speaking like I can just pluck one from the air is insulting. I'm not even that picky for a wife material. The reason why the fuck buddy isnt on the list is because her foundations are different from my own. A marriage like that would crumble if it could even happen.
        
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Analsexn69lvr5

4 years ago

Stop fucking her. She has changed the terms of your original contract.

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xnathan319

4 years ago

its normal for her to develop feelings but you can't continue sleeping with her if she is itll kill her

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Garthh

4 years ago

Friends with benefits?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  We are not friends outside of the bedroom so no
  
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  - Garthh
    
    4 years ago
    
    Strangers with benefits?
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      4 years ago
      
      Yes
      
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[Old Memory]

4 years ago

Ugh

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NoLifer

4 years ago

Well you run thus risk with any sexual partner. Some people just get attached.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  Unfortunate things like that tend to happen I see. If she was 100 lbs lighter and had the drive to have a better life plan then hoping to score a rich guy. She would be on my dating radar but shes not on it currently.
  
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Iszzy123

4 years ago

I say let her go she she wants more you can’t give it or willing to try before any benefits remember to BE A Friend

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  I said sex buddies not fwb. Theres a difference. Fwb you are actually friends fuck buddies just meet for sex.
  
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  - Iszzy123
    
    4 years ago
    
    Clearly ur not deacent guy so just look for a new one while ur with her then end it
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      4 years ago
      
      That was a side goal.
      
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[Old Memory]

4 years ago

Were you upfront about the "contract" and your plans for the relationship to begin with? I think you should just tell her plain and simple what exactly is going on.

She may not be dtf after that, but it would be trashy to postpone confronting her, and to continue to mislead her because finding another fuckbuddy would be hard.

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RoseIsabella

4 years ago

What did you expect?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  Causual sex to get it both out of our systems and being able to have a good work week.
  
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  - RoseIsabella
    
    4 years ago
    
    It's unrealistic to expect everything to always turn out the way you want, and without a hitch.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      4 years ago
      
      I dont expect things to turn out how I want. I'm a pessimist. I'm just looking for the most efficient way to get my plans working. I need a sexual outlet and sexbuddies fits the bill.
      
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Clunk42

4 years ago

Perhaps you could give her a chance? I don't know, just throwing ideas out there.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  If it didnt manifest before during and after sex its not going to manifest. Shes barely acceptable for fuck buddies shes not my type for gf or wife material hell it's a long shot for just standard fwb.
  
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  - zarabell
    
    4 years ago
    
    LOL. the truth is a powerful thing. better to be careful with explaining this to her, since that is how you feel. if you like her as a person, which I presume you do since you're being intimate with her, then try to not hurt her too much and make it that the problem is yours. an example..? pp[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[
    
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bigbudchonga

4 years ago

I suppose it depends how strong her feelings are. If they're just there a little bit then I would keep it going, but if not then I would let her know and break it off.

Also, if she's a feminist, be careful how you tell her you don't have the same feelings, I wouldn't be surprised if she tries to slap you with a rape charge if she knows your love is unrequited.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  Thanks for the heads up.
  
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  - bigbudchonga
    
    4 years ago
    
    No problem, dude. Good luck
    
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  4 years ago
  
  Thanks for the heads up.
  
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Are You Normal?

Is it normal that a fuckbuddy is falling for me?