Ask Your Question today
When I was in college, a guy had a crush on me. But, i rejected him because we had different lifestyle and i thought that it was impossible for us to be together. He cried because of the rejection..It is normal?
longer he cries, longer he had crush on you, and imagined/planned a life with you
That guy sounds like he's an insecure person and probably has a bunch of issues.
Yes, I see everybody who has "issues" is insecure. Insecurity is the root problem to everything.
Oh, you are depressed? You're insecure. You have anger issues? Meh, you're just insecure. You hear voices? You're just insecure. You killed your whole entire family and don't feel remorse? Oh, you're just insecure. Yep, sounds about right.
I agree with both Skulls and lolman that it either could have been his first rejection, the straw that broke the camel's back, or he'd had a crush on you for awhile and had daydreamed and fantasized about a life with you for some time, and was crushed when he realized those dreams wouldn't become a reality. It's sad, but unfortunately a part of dating nearly everyone experiences. You definitely didn't do anything wrong assuming you were polite about it.
Thanks bbrown95. I agree with your third point. Maybe i crushed his dreams or maybe the rejection was unexpected because we were friends. That's why he was upset.
"Nearly everyone".
I like how you exclude aromantics. Shows what kind of person you are.
Key word being "nearly". Not sure if you're being sarcastic or not (as it's sometimes hard to interpret via text). Aromantics are in the minority of people, hence my use of "nearly", since the majority people experience romantic attraction, and rejection is an extremely common experience amongst the human population.
I'm aromantic, by the way. 🤣
Yeah, guys get very bruised by rejection more than they’ll admit. And there’s nothing wrong with crying in private but NEVER let the know you’re hurt because she’ll think you’re a wimp and only laugh at you.
Its normal to get sad over rejection. I rejected a guy because we had completely different lifestyles too once but he took it well at least and we were friends until he ended it because our lifestyles were too different... lol. Its a good and smart thing to take such things as lifestyle into account when you are presented with a potential partner and he'll likely understand that one day. A lot of people never take things like that into account and has to break up when they realize they want different things and at that point it's truly painful because you're commited to each other.
Thanks kikilizzo for your opinion. Yes, that's what i thought before rejecting him. Why wasting my time dating someone that would like different things in life? Even if we were together, we would break up one day. Neither of us would change our lifestyle because it's a part of us. I wish he will understand this one day.
Rejections hurt. My man probably just really liked you and it inflated his ego a little.
Maybe it was his first rejection? Or maybe there were other stressful issues in his life and this was the “straw that broke the camel’s back”? There could be many reasons. It is odd that he broke down there and then instead of holding it in until he got back to his dorm but as I said this may have been one recent incident too many for him.
What you did to him was horrible. This goes to show you're inconsiderate of other people's feelings.
Politely rejecting someone you are not attracted to or compatible with is not “inconsiderate”. People don’t owe you a date just because you asked.
Agreed. Not to mention that it's way worse to date someone knowing you're not interested in them and it likely won't last, because then you're wasting both of your time and the hurt feelings will be even greater.
OP never said she did it in a polite way.
Even then, it just shows the OP didn't consider how he would feel at all.
Sounds really yucky.
If he can't handle rejection then he shouldn't approach anyone. If anything I think it was rude of him to cry in front of her. He should have kept that to himself as should anyone male, or female who wishes to approach the object of his, or her affection. I think crying about being rejected out in the open like that in front of the person one is interested in is creepy, manipulative and pathetic.
I think people should refrain from approaching their so called crushes if they can't accept rejection gracefully. 🙂
Well, then they only have their own selves to blame if they get rejected, get all booty hurt about being rejected and embarrass themselves by crying, or freaking out about it all.
... like for instance, if a guy is hitting on some chick, and she politely tells him she's not interested in anything other than friendship, and he gets butthurt, and curses her out for no reason. It just serves to reaffirm to her that she made the best possible choice, and by rejecting him she dodged a bullet.
... and yes the same goes for women who want to pick up men, and get rejected for whatever reason. If a person can't handle rejection gracefully then he, or she is a walking disaster, and NOT relationship material!