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I am an 18 yr old female who has never touched herself before. I sometimes check adult content but i never touch myself, hence have never reached climax or so. Also it's been years like this, it's not like i'm newly finding my sexuality.
There's nothing that says you must masturbate and - in spite of what some religious nutjobs claim - there's no cosmic law that makes masturbating evil, and it is not physically or mentally harmful.
It's your body, and you should feel free to do and not do whatever the hell you want with it.
It seems to me the thing you should be pondering is _why_ you have no interest in masturbating or even touching yourself in a sexual way. Nobody here is going to be able to give you the answer to that question.
Just as women shouldn't be pressured to ignore or be ashamed of any sexual urges they feel, women should not be made to feel weird if they're simply not interested in sex. Maybe your lack of interest is simply how you happen to be wired up in your head. But it's possible that all sorts of messages you've received in various forms from the time you were very small mean that you now feel that you _shouldn't_ feel any sexual urges, and so you don't. It's also possible that those messages have left you feeling that what's between your legs is nasty, and so the very thought of touching yourself there disgusts you.
One thing that's certain is that if you don't know how to give yourself an orgasm, that's going to make it difficult for you to have one when (and if) you have sex with someone else. If you have no understanding of how your own sexual response works and what you need in order to come and you're so sexually inhibited that you have no interest in figuring that out, it is unrealistic to expect that someone else will intuitively understand what you need.
Maybe that matters to you, and maybe it doesn't. It's your choice to make.
Thank you for taking your time to properly reply, i do appreciate it really.
Figuring out what works for me down there doesn't really excite me, I don't feel like touching myself when i see adult content, sure i get turned on but it doesn't go any further. I'm thinking maybe it's because it's the idea of me doing it?
I see hot guys and I'm attracted to their bodies, but their appearance never really does the trick for me since I am not attracted to their personality. But if I connect with them on an emotional level, even if they dont have my standards of being "hot" I would be willing to live sexual things with them whereas I wouldn't let a hot guy touch me just because he is hot.
Maybe it's because I find the idea of sexual activity only if it's with someone I have an emotional connection with. I don't think i would be excited to touch myself but the idea of the person i like touching me excites me.
But as you said there isn't a certain answer for it, thank you again for replying.
I'm so ancient that what you describe sounds perfectly normal to me, but I think there's a label you can apply to yourself these days: "Demisexual". There's even an official flag you can carry at Pride Marches, should you feel so inclined. 🙄
If you'd like to try to get a better understanding of your sexuality, you might consider reading "Come As You Are" by Emily Nagosky. She covers a lot of really interesting stuff which has been established by researchers into female sexuality, but isn't yet widely understood by the general public.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Come-You-Are-surprising-transform/dp/1925228010/ref=sr_1_1?crid=LLHO3ULPRLUI&dchild=1&keywords=come+as+you+are&qid=1627729530&sprefix=come+as+you+%2Caps%2C173&sr=8-1
I think i'm old fashioned then, yes, what i described is normal for me and you, but for the rest of the world it's not common nowadays unfortunately. People jump in whenever their hormones go wild, and do wild things with people they dont know anything about.
Thank you for your suggestions, if I can, i will try to read the book as well.
Meh, seems normal. Some people just aren't into the idea of masturbating.
Back in the day when porn wasn't this widespread masturbation was also not too popular
It's true that it wasn't "popular" in the sense that people didn't admit that they did it because it was considered shameful, sinful and deviant, but the majority of people have always done it.
Alfred Kinsey started researching sexuality back in the 1940s. He interviewed thousands of Americans, and he found that 92% of the men and 62% of the women they interviewed said they had masturbated at least once in their lives. Many said they did it quite regularly.
it's normal
this is just from anecdotal experience but apparently for some girls it's normal or at least not unheard of, so don't worry too much
never really came across any guy who never did it by 15 at the latest though
It's totally okay! Since you check out adult content I'm guessing you're not asexual, but you might just have a low sex drive, which is perfectly fine. I can't really relate as I started masturbating at a quite young age, but people have different needs. As long as it's not a problem for you - there's no reason to worry :)
Totally normal. Its your body and your sexuality. What works for you is just fine.
When I grew up female masturbation was not that big of a thing. Yes it existed; but, it was quite common for many Ladies to not participate in it.
I personally think these modern times have gone too overboard on expecting so many people to be super sexually active. That's not how most humans are actually wired from a long term perspective.
Love, Laugh, and Live Life... Your Way!
Sorry, OP. I didn't factor in that English might not be your native language and that you might just write in this style. I'm a high school teacher of English as a foreign language and most of my 18-year-olds' English has more flagrant errors in it, so you'd really know it was their second language. What matters more to me than their English though is that they're safe and happy and well-equipped to go through life, and that their dignity is respected. That's why I went crazy just now when it seemed to me like a perverted older person was trying to spin a titillating story about a teenage girl, presumably to touch him/herself to.
As for the issue of touching yourself, I can only speak for myself. I'm 31 and single and I have never slept with anyone, out of choice.
I'd say I personally regret having started masturbating. It's just another bodily appetite crying out at you, like an appetite for food, and it tricks you into thinking you HAVE to satisfy it, when actually, unlike with food, you don't HAVE to do anything about it at all. You won't die by not masturbating.
Masturbation can become an annoying thing where you've got the urge to do it, but at the same time you don't really want to do it, but it feels like a compulsion so you tend to give in anyway. You know, like when you start eating because you're bored and then you can't stop even though you're full? In my experience masturbation feels good immediately after you finish, perhaps in the same way as scratching an itch feels good, but for me, about half an hour afterwards or less, I just feel empty and my thoughts are all clouded and unfocused. Sometimes even while I'm doing it, I hate doing it. But over time I have trained myself to crave the orgasm at the end and that's the only reason I do it.
When I imagine what my future sex life will be like, I can't imagine being happy to just enjoy my future husband without climaxing, since that's the only reason I'd masturbate. From what I've learned, real sex isn't like it is in films. It can't always end in climax, and to be honest, I don't want the objective of it to always be climax. I'd like to enjoy my future husband's body for its own sake and not just want my body to experience an orgasm all the time.
So basically, I'd say that touching oneself it's one of life's cheap thrills, but it becomes pretty mundane and it's habit-forming in frustrating ways.
I'll mention as an afterthought that I'm thankful I don't usually feel a need to use images. I wouldn't want to train my brain to associate sex with a particular kind of image or activity, and to only be satisfied with that. I don't want to desensitize myself to things of a mildly sexual nature and then have to progress to increasingly indecent and undignified images in order to get my orgasm 'fix'.
Now, I have tried to be as candid as possible because if you're a real 18-year-old young woman, you deserve frankness. Please remember to treat your own body with dignity and not tolerate any person who disrespects it or tries to push you into anything.
I see, so it is kind of addicting, becomes a habit. I have never done it and was wondering if it's really so weird since i'm a teenager with hormones and all. I have a best friend of 10 years and i recently told her about it and she was very surprised.It got me thinking if what i described is really that uncommon. I do not feel the need to touch myself even though i sometimes check adult content and get turned on, but it never goes beyond that. I did explain it more in one of my previous comments, so i guess i may define my sexuality as "demisexual" according to the tags in the world these days.
Thank you for your candid reply, it certainly helped me. I don't think I will do anything sexual with anybody until I'm certain of them, and I haven't done anything of sorts so far. I do respect my body and I plan to keep it that way.
People’s experiences vary and masterbation isn’t addictive for everyone. Some people, myself included, still rarely feel desire to despite knowing our bodies well.
Even if you have no interest in masterbation (which is completely ok) I recommend learning about the different parts of the vulva and vagina just so you are aware of your body.