Is it normal that i'm wondering if i should leave my partner or not
Before I list all of the reasons that I am considering splitting up with my partner, I want to preface this by saying I admire her hugely as a person, and I wouldn't want our potential breakup to hurt her any more than it should. She has overcome many dark times throughout her life, and I respect the way she's dealt with her demons and still manages to look the world in the eye and smile... I just think that for the following reasons we'd be better as friends than lovers:
Me and my partner have been in a relationship for almost 11 months now, and whilst neither of us have cheated (as far as I'm aware, at least) or been violent towards eachother, it hasn't escaped my attention that we've only spent one of our anniversaries together (our 1 month) and she completely missed my birthday last year...
Our relationship feels a lot like one way traffic to me, and although I don't feel entirely disrespected (she has never used me financially, seems to enjoy my company when we're together, and she says she loves me which I genuinely believe she does), I still feel like something is a little off and I'm not getting out of my relationship what I'm putting in.
What I believe the elephant in the room is, is sex. Because of her past abusive relationships, she finds it very hard to express herself in a sexually open way, and while I place a large amount of importance on consent and completely respect her "no", I point blank refuse to cheat, although I still need to find a way to satiate my own sexual desires because she's not comfortable with that yet. I feel sexually repressed at times and it gets me kinda down.
Of course, there is the possibility that maybe I'm the problem. I'm by no means God's gift to all women but I'm willing to work on myself. Either way, the fact remains one of us is jaded and disillusioned while the other is not.
I know it will break her heart if it happens, but am I an A-hole for considering breaking up? Is it normal?