Is it normal that i show all the warning signs of a sexually abused person?

42% Normal
44 Comments

My psychologist says that I display all the warning signs of an abused girl, sexually and physically. However, I have never been abused...I am 18.

Some of the warning signs she observed are:

Fear of men
sexual attraction to being hit
sexual attraction to being aggressively dominated (basically rape)
Avoidance of men

etc etc.

I'v never had a boyfriend or done anything sexual because of my fear of men.

Voting Results
42% Normal
Based on 154 votes (65 yes)
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Comments ( 44 )
  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago | pl

    I think it's normal but it could also indicate you have some other issue, for example your fear and avoidance of men could be social anxiety. The best person to figure out your problems is yourself.

    I have some typical ptsd symptoms, for example anger problems, homicidal thoughts and nightmares. However I know I don't have ptsd, but I have other neurological issues that may have caused these symptoms.

    Sometimes these things have no reason other than everyone's mind works differently.

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  • squirrelgirl
    10 years ago

    When I was a child, people used to ask my mom if I had been abused because I had (and still have) a lot of mental/emotional problems. Since I grew up in a loving and nurturing environment, I can only assume it's genetic because mental illness runs on both sides of the family, especially my mom's.

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  • RomeoDeMontague
    10 years ago

    Your doctor is an idiot. its called S&M and it was never classified as a mental issue though they have been trying for awhile. It has yet to be in the book as a "Mental problem".

    Though I have spoken with some abused victims who become like that but its not necessarily a sign of someone who is sexually abused. It just means you have different tastes and that is totally normal.

    Also in what way are you afraid of man?

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    • JessAndHerHorse
      10 years ago

      Thank for your comment, I just looked up S&M and I agree that it could have something to do with that, However, where does the fear of men come from them?

      By fear of men, I mean that I feel anxious/scared around them, don't trust them, and feel as if they want to do is hurt or use me.

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      • RomeoDeMontague
        10 years ago

        Well I cant say that fear is a bad one. However not all men are going to hurt you. You should always be safe when you go to bars, don't leave drinks unintended, you know stranger danger stuff like that.

        Dont you have adults male figures in your life? or no? Some men are bad news and just creeps but that is not every single man. Its not an unreasonable fear though since not all people in the world can be trusted and the point is to figure out which are the right people to trust.

        However if you are young I could see where your doctor would be concerned. Since generally when young people have thoughts like this people tend to believe its abnormal or dangerous. Which it is not always.

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  • pooja_kothari
    10 years ago

    If I was in the same situation I would slap that shit out of you.

    No offense but imagine me going two fingers deep in on your moms lovely puss

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  • Avant-Garde
    10 years ago

    It is possible to have been abused and not remember it. It is called,"Memory Repression or repressed memories". It's the brain's reaction to trauma.

    http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Repressed_memory

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  • TeoBeast
    10 years ago

    You have a fear of men? I'm just going to say no comment... and end it there.

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  • randomthoughts
    10 years ago

    I don't understand why some people who are sexually abused and mentally scarred for life ever go near men, when I know a few that have had that kind of abuse yet still have and seek a bf? I mean I am pretty sure that if I was a victim of sexual abuse I would not go near men. Why are some victims of violation/molestation ok with men and others are completely frigid and avoid men?

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  • thesugarbitch
    10 years ago

    I'm actually afraid of being touched by female relatives because I've been sexually violated when I was really young. I wasn't clear what had happened until I was much older and realized I had been taken advantage of. I then discovered the correlation between fearing and hating my close family touching me and what have happened when I was a child.

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    • RoseIsabella
      10 years ago

      Oh my lord, I'm so sorry to hear that! I have a dear friend who was abused like that by both parents. He said once that he had nightmares of being stabbed to death all his life. I've met grown men and women who are afraid of the dark to this day because of the abuse they suffered.

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      • fukpeople
        10 years ago

        why are they afraid of the dark? what does the dark have to do with their abuse if i may ask?

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        • RoseIsabella
          10 years ago

          Because a lot of abusers come into the child's bedroom at night.

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          • [Old Memory]
            10 years ago

            **Kicks RoseIsabella in the vagina**

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  • challenge
    10 years ago

    Why are you asking us about this, as opposed to the psychologist? If my car is broken, I don't tell my mechanic that I'll get back to him/her when I've asked my dentist about it.

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    • [Old Memory]
      10 years ago

      As somebody who has been to psychologists I can say that they don't know what they are doing a lot of the time. OP probably feels she can get better advice from talking to a variety of people who have different opinions than just one person who likely thinks they know other people more than those people know themselves just because they took some classes on brain philosophy.

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      • RoseIsabella
        10 years ago

        Excellent point! Mental health professionals are human and can be biased. A lot of Psychiatrists are particularly biased against people with Borderline personality disorder. I imagine they must be quite frustrated and annoyed when a condition's main treatment is not medication but cognitive behavioral therapy instead. So the amount of progress made has a direct correlation to the amount of work the patient is willing to do.

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      • challenge
        10 years ago

        I have no problem with that whatsoever. I asked the question and if someone says "I sought medical advice but I distrust it and prefer to hear what people on the internet say", that's fine. If it's said by the person asking, I don't mind them avoiding anything medical.

        But you're telling me what the OP "probably" feels?

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        • [Old Memory]
          10 years ago

          You're right. Bad wording choice on my part. I'm just making guesses based off my own experience with doctors.

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          • challenge
            10 years ago

            I'd probably have said the same thing myself. Sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel bad about this. I'm being a bit analytical on this post as a whole and I might be coming across as a bit of an asshole.

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            • [Old Memory]
              10 years ago

              I didn't think you were being an asshole. I have been working on using better wording choices over the years and am not offended by any input because it has helped communicate better.

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    • StrawberryTurtle
      10 years ago

      Because she is embarrassed and wants to talk to people who can't physically see her,so her identity is safe.

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    • [Old Memory]
      10 years ago

      But maybe there are some of us here that can relate to her of have the same problems or are a psychologist as well.

      Asking does not harm anyone.

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      • challenge
        10 years ago

        My question wasn't about the harm caused by asking but about the reason for asking.

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    • JessAndHerHorse
      10 years ago

      Why are you getting so offended? Like "Bellwether" said, asking harms no one. I'm trying to find out if there are others like myself, since I DID talk to the psychologist, and it isn't helping.

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      • challenge
        10 years ago

        I'm not offended or becoming offended or becoming so offended. However, I did ask a question. I don't mean to be rude but can we start from the start?

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        • JessAndHerHorse
          10 years ago

          Ok, I'll "start from the start"

          You asked me why I am posting on here instead of asking my psychologist, and I said : "I'm trying to find out if there are others like myself, since I DID talk to the psychologist, and it isn't helping."

          Maybe you should read.

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          • challenge
            10 years ago

            Why did you think I was offended?

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  • fukpeople
    10 years ago

    what do u mean she could observe these following signs: sexual attraction to being hit
    sexual attraction to being aggressively dominated (basically rape)
    How can u be sexually attracted to being aggressively dominated as in rape? that sentence doesn't make sense? O.o

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    • JessAndHerHorse
      10 years ago

      How does is not make sense?

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      • fukpeople
        10 years ago

        I am not going to bother explaining myself again as I have already given my reasons as above ^

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        • 3L337
          10 years ago

          JessAndHerHorse demand you explain yourself. You will do as the human-horse hybrid says.

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          • fukpeople
            10 years ago

            ALREADY have. If you did not understand then you are obviously too thick to get it sorry.

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