Is it normal that jesus is present while touching myself

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38 Comments

I'm wondering how ppl turn him "off" during those moments. I know I'm not a perfect Christian.

Voting Results
70% Normal
Based on 30 votes (21 yes)
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Comments ( 38 )
  • dytrog
    8 years ago

    Are you talking about a Mexican friend Jesus?

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    • RoseIsabella
      8 years ago

      Oh man, in that case just close the blinds.
      ;-)

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  • wistfulmaiden
    8 years ago

    Stop worrying about masturbation being wrong. It's better than rape or suppressing your natural sex urges. god didn't make it pleasant cause it's wrong; would that make sense?

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    • Ellenna
      8 years ago

      First sentence I agree with, but as for the rest of your post: lots of people commit predatory sexual acts (for example, rape) which they find pleasant, did god create that urge too?

      H/she/it didn't include Thou Shalt Not Rape or Thou Shalt Not Sexually Abuse Children in the 10 commandments, in case you hadn't noticed.

      And no, you don't make sense

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      • wistfulmaiden
        8 years ago

        Well I'm trying to explain it from a religious point of view since the person believes God is watching them. Maybe a good rule is : masturbation only involved yourself and harms none so it's fine to give in to it. Rape and molesting harm others.
        I don't follow Old Testament stuff I basically believe the " treat everyone with respect " golden rule type thing.

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        • Ellenna
          8 years ago

          Thanks for clarification, makes sense now

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          • wistfulmaiden
            8 years ago

            :) I try!

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    • masterferdan
      8 years ago

      masturbation is a mortal sin and will demolish your body and soul. the bible even clearly states that should you do such an act, you need to gouge your eyes out and cut your right hand off.

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  • _Crusades
    8 years ago

    Are you prepared to accept Jesus inside of you?

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  • heckleBucker
    8 years ago

    You've been duped into some damaging religious psychology. Orgasms are healthy. Touch yourself and be happy.

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    • Thunder_Ass
      8 years ago

      Masturbation makes Baby Jesus cry.

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      • thegypsysailor
        8 years ago

        I thought he was dead? How do dead people cry?

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        • anti-hero
          8 years ago

          Furthermore he lived into his 30s, he wouldn't be a baby.

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  • thegypsysailor
    8 years ago

    I'm sure if he was there, he'd jump right in and help you out. There's no reason to believe he wasn't gay is there? After all he didn't marry and only gay men didn't marry in those days.
    Take that Kim Davis!

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    • Thunder_Ass
      8 years ago

      Was Gilligans island your favorite TV show?

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    • konyagiPapi
      8 years ago

      That's offensive to me coz am a christian...

      Dude,such jokes should have limits

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      • anti-hero
        8 years ago

        So what? Freedom of speech. If you can't handle jokes about Christianity then you are no better than the savage morons who riot over someone drawing a picture of their imaginary friend Mohammed. As Jesus said, turn the other cheek. If you are really so offended and a Christian, you'd pray for thegypsysailor.

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        • konyagiPapi
          8 years ago

          I don't know you,but it seems u are not educated at all or maybe little..

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          • charli.m
            8 years ago

            A Christian who wants a porn subscription...

            And you have the nerve to say you're offended by others not being Christian? And call other people uneducated when they've formed a more coherent thought than you?

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            • konyagiPapi
              8 years ago

              And I never said I'm offended by others not being christians,I was offended becoz someone called Juesus gay..read mana,reaaaad!!

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            • konyagiPapi
              8 years ago

              I never said I want a porn subscriptions,I said I'd consider
              that..why u guys just rush on things..what u smokin woman?

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          • anti-hero
            8 years ago

            You're a fake hypocrite "Christian". "U" are the uneducated one.

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            • konyagiPapi
              8 years ago

              What makes me fake?? The thing is,in christianity there are two types of peoples.1:-who follows the bible,prays all day,go to church each sunday and don't sin.
              2:-who don't go to church each sunday,who don't even know the bible well,don't even think of prayers and sin a lot...u will find me at number two..but when someone calls jesus gay,I'm offended. So what are u?

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      • thegypsysailor
        8 years ago

        Cool! I've got plenty more for you to get offended over. Just hang around.

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  • MattHat
    8 years ago

    in mexican prison

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  • dick555
    8 years ago

    Even though He is everywhere, you have a free will to do what you want. You need to live with yourself.

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  • VirgilManly
    8 years ago

    All your dead relatives are watching you too.
    They're so disappointed.

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