Is it normal that my friend treats me this way or is it abuse?
Hi guys I have a big problem. My best friend of now 7years, is not a good friend. She seems to be, what I feel, might be abusive. She harasses me and makes me feel bad about myself, she's always the only who is in charge, and she's always right. She knows that I have anxiety about time and she purposely ignores my worries and will stay longer than I ask her to or force me to stay with her, even when I've said I need to get home. She won't text me until literally 15 minutes before an event, with details- it seems like her way of being in control. One night I was trying to sleep and she kept spraying me with a water bottle for an hour, even after I got angry. She also likes to belittle me and my problems, especially around co workers( we also work together). I have a bad habit of picking my fingers and whenever she catches me, or thinks that she caught me, even when I'm not picking, she slaps me very hard, to the point where I'm terrified to move around hee. She is extremely bossy and her mother is the same way. Recently we had a big talk and she basically told me that I'M bossy and controlling and always need to be right. I was shocked because I feel that these are her traits. We haven't been talking as much since I've began standing up to her, she's been cold and distant at work. However, she likes to try to communicate with me on social media 24 7. I am getting a new puppy and she wants me to "walk our dogs together". I'm worried if I hang out with her again, I'll fall back into her trap. I really don't want to, I just got free. I have a shy and passive personality, which often leads to being taken advantage of. It could be my fault for letting her do this. So my question, is it normal for my friend to do this- maybe I am overthinking the whole thing and I'm just stuck with a bossy friend that I can't speak up to or am I in an abusive friendship?