Is it normal to be afraid to take birth control bc i'm afraid to gain weight?

My boyfriend really wants me to get on birth control (like the pill) to give him more peace of mind. I understand that completely and can't hold that against him in any way, because we are too young and not in the right place in life to have children.

But after looking at types of birth control, I saw that all of the hormonal methods have the possible side effect of gaining weight.

I just feel like I can't risk that. I've been working so hard to be thin and I can't risk putting on more weight, especially knowing it's from a pill I willingly swallow every day.

is it normal to have such an intense fear of taking birth control because of this reason? My boyfriend finds it irrational and immature, but I don't at all. It's a real fear to me.

Voting Results
51% Normal
Based on 90 votes (46 yes)
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Comments ( 25 )
  • dom180

    At risk of being too blunt:

    You seem very, very insecure about your weight and that is the biggest issue here. It isn't in any way normal to worry that much about gaining such a small amount of weight, especially if it's as little as 5 pounds. I don't know much about eating disorders, but there are people here who do who can probably help you more if they see this. You should talk to someone seriously about your weight insecurity, be it your boyfriend or a close friend or a family member or a therapist. You don't have to be thin to have an eating disorder and there is no shame in having one, but talking about it to someone could start you on a road to feeling much more comfortable with your body.

    EDIT: If you don't mind me asking, how much do you weigh? I'm willing to bet you're in much better shape than you think you are.

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    • RomeoDeMontague

      You know being overweight is not ideal in any situation. Maybe gaining is no big deal if you are underweight in which case gaining a few pounds is just going to pull you to a normal weight. A lot of people do not like to start gaining too much weight and it really should not be encouraged to get heavy. Granted overweight people should not be judged for it but its not a good thing. Unless maybe you are a sumo wrestler. Most women worry about gaining weight from birth control. So it is normal to worry about this type of thing.

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      • I'm not "overweight". My BMI is 19.1, but I'm pretty sure BMI doesn't mean anything because I'm pretty fat, and according to that I'm .6 away from being underweight.. But yeah I dunno I just don't want to gain weight at all, ever. I want to lose weight and taking the pill sounds too risky, it will either make me gain weight or stop me from losing weight.

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      • dom180

        Gaining a few pounds won't make you overweight unless you were overweight already, and it won't make you dramatically unhealthier because the extra weight is due to fluid retention and not extra fat. I don't think very many women would rather risk having a child than have to worry about a few pounds, and neither do I think that attitude is healthy.

        Besides, in most women it's a myth that the pill = weight gain: http://www.webmd.com/sex/birth-control/birth-control-pills-weight-gain

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    • I'm so embarrassed to even type this. I guess it's anonymous though... Ugh. 121 pounds.

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      • RomeoDeMontague

        Some women choose not to take the birth control pill for this reason. What reasons are you taking it for? If you are taking it for sex they do have the female condom and other type of protection. If you are taking it to balance out your hormones like some women do I would say ask your doctor if there is any other options. It said the reason women gain weight is it causes you to retain water. So it is water weight.

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      • dom180

        Thank you for saying, it must have been difficult. Thing is, I think most people will agree with me that 121 pounds is a long way from what is considered fat. There are plenty of attractive women who weigh a lot more than you do. There is absolutely no reason to be embarrassed about 121 pounds, in fact there are probably a lot of people who would love to look like you do :) You're 40 pounds *lighter* than the average in America - if that isn't thin I don't know what is.

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        • Thanks...

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  • RoseIsabella

    I think your boyfriend is a selfish jerk who doesn't want to wear condoms anymore! There's nothing wrong with being 120 pounds and wanting to stay at that weight. It is your body after all. Birth control pills have more side effects than just weight gain. If you smoke cigarettes birth control can cause a stroke especially after you turn thirty.

    You don't sound fat at all to me. Without knowing your height I can't begin to comment on your weight but if you want to shed some dead weight get rid of that selfish boyfriend of yours. It's your body. Sex doesn't have to be part of a relationship before marriage.

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    • He's really not selfish. I'm with him on hating condoms. They suck. And I also have made the choice myself to have sex too. I know you're just looking out and trying to give advice, but don't judge him without knowing him. He treats me better than anyone ever has. Besides, my question was about my fear, not about him. Not trying to be mean or anything but I'm gonna defend my boyfriend when someone bashes him.

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      • RoseIsabella

        Well good for you. Then just go ahead and get the pills and take em.

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  • sarber144

    In my opinion I think that you should go on a regular dieand eat healthier and do lots of excersizes that will help you loose weight.And also drink alots of water.That's what I do to lose weight.

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  • lol1055

    no, who cares if you gain, stop worrying about your weight, most people gain 70 lbs a year, its normal so what?

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    • 70 pounds??? Where are you getting this information?

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  • kelili

    That crossed my mind when I thought about taking the pill but it didn't scared me out.

    Luckily no change.

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    • Yeah you're lucky.

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  • BurnaBaby27

    You won't gain like twenty pounds, at most you'll gain about five if you gain any at all. I've been on bc for about two years and I haven't noticed a significant difference in my weight.

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    • Five pounds is a lot...

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      • BurnaBaby27

        It's not that much..there's a chance you won't put on any weight.

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        • But there's a chance that I will.

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  • ProseAthlete

    The pill might make you gain weight; pregnancy will definitely make you gain weight. It doesn't seem like a smart trade-off to me, especially as the pill is by far the most reliable option.

    If you don't want to take the pill because of the hormonal changes it can put you through or because you need to take precautions against infections (not to say you do, but if it's a new relationship, you need to think about that until you've both been tested), that's pretty normal. Not wanting to take it because of the possibility of a few pounds, though, sounds a little alarming to me. I'm not sure it's healthy to have an intense fear of possible minor weight gain.

    It doesn't sound immature so much as it sounds like a nascent eating disorder -- although I hasten to add that no one can diagnose you online, least of all some chick on IIN. :)

    One thing to keep in mind: If you take the pill and find you just can't take what it's doing to you physically or psychologically, you can always stop. You might find that feeling more relaxed about more reliable birth control is worth any anxiety about a possible pound or two.

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    • My boyfriend and I got into a little argument about it a few days ago. He's been wanting me to try getting on birth control for months, and we've been together for a while. Infections aren't an issue.

      But no, I ended up crying at the thought of possibly gaining weight after he told me it's irrational and immature. I know he wouldn't want to be with a fat pig, and I'm really sick of being one, and I know the pill won't help with that.

      And I don't think it's very possible for me to have an eating disorder. I'm too fat to have one.

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      • Sog

        You say you're working hard to be thin... but then you call yourself too fat. So you mean you're trying to lose weight now, but you're having trouble?

        If you have a good weight loss plan, taking the pill shouldn't really matter. But if the plan you're on now isn't working, you need to figure out why and change that.

        These are really two separate issues. You really should be on the pill so that you don't accidentally end up pregnant. I hope at the very least you're using condoms so that you aren't one accident away from unwanted pregnancy. I can't blame your boyfriend for worrying about this.

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        • Yes, I am working hard toward my goal weight and I'm not there yet. Not so much having trouble as much as I just wish it would happen faster.

          And the pill scares me because gaining any weight would make me feel like a failure. Like all of the work and pain I go through was worthless. I hate even thinking about it.

          I don't blame him either...

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          • Sog

            Accidentally getting pregnant should scare you a whole lot more than gaining a few extra pounds (or preventing you from losing them).

            And if you aren't using any other kind of birth control, then you're out of your freaking mind.

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