Is it normal to feel so hopelessly attracted to a same-sex friend?

60% Normal
6 Comments

I'm 21f and I feel so infatuated with one of my friends that it's overwhelming.

It almost feels like I have a high when she sits really close to me or even when I catch her smell. I obsess over so many little things about her. Her voice, her lips, her collarbones, everything, even the very color/shade her hair, skin, and eyes.

I just feel stupid to feel this obsessed. I could listen to her talk for hours about things that I had no prior interest in because her passion alone is enough to excite me about such topics.

I've already fantasized about her quite a bit. About seeing the way her body would react to each touch and hearing the noises she'd make in bed. Not that this would ever happen.

She once slipped in a comment that she was questioning her sexuality, but it was in an unserious tone(she said it while talking about a fictional character), so I didn't press on. That small comment aside, her interest seems to be mostly men, and she doesn't know the extent to which I'm attracted to women.

All of this makes me feel wrong. Is it normal to feel all of this?

Voting Results
60% Normal
Based on 10 votes (6 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 6 )
  • JellyBeanBandit
    1 year ago

    Yeah it's normal, it's just a crush. Too bad that it's on a straight girl though.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
  • techpc
    1 year ago

    Do yourself a favor. Distance yourself from her, because if she's not into you then all you will do is hurt yourself more.

    Plenty of guys have found themselves in a situation like this
    (except usually the girl is attracted to men but just not him), and the solution is always to move on.

    Go find someone else.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
      -
    • ospry
      1 year ago

      This is the most incel-sounding answer someone could give. Yeah, a friend you have a crush on not reciprocating your feelings always sucks, but if your instinct is to turn your back on them and cut them off for that reason, then you were never friends with them in the first place. Friends don't see their friendships as conditional on whether or not they wanna bone you

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      0
      0
        -
      • techpc
        1 year ago

        It's the most practical answer, and the one that will make things better in the long run.

        If someone is absolutely obsessed with someone, do you think they will stop just because they don't act on it for so long? It's not going to get better by waiting.

        The incel answer would be to draw out your own pain and eventually get crushed when she gets a boyfriend.

        Of course you can be friends with someone, then catch feelings. Sometimes those feelings are unreciprocated.

        Comment Hidden ( show )
        0
        0
  • 1WeirdGuy
    1 year ago

    Quit being a puss and tell her you think shes hot

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    1
    1
  • stargazermgj
    1 year ago

    How can you be so certain that she wouldn't entertain an advance from you?

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    0
    0