Is it normal to have (had) a grandma like this?

Your grandma likely cared about you, she wanted to have some quality time before her passing ( in other words her death. ).

Normaljudge is bang on with this one. Sounds like she just loved you and wanted to do things with you that she enjoyed and that she, I'm guessing, hoped would be passed onto you. It's sad you've got social anxiety. My nan does the same kid of stuff as yours used to with specific chapter bible study, and I just laid it out flat that I don't want to do bible study, but I'm reading the bible anyway and will talk to her about the bits I've read through.

You should have laid it out with her more. It sounds like your social anxiety stopped you doing this, which is sad, because you missed out on a nice relationship with your grandma.

I understand your situation (and I don't think some of the other posters do).

When you feel obligated to constantly do things that you would rather not for someone; it's quite a relief when they are gone out of your life.

It is actually a form of abuse. To what degree I'm not certain. But, clearly it was not a mutually beneficial relationship; and I'm sure that it really is a relief now that its over.

I believe later that you will likely see your grandmother in a somewhat different light. Then you will appreciate the other good things she did for you. But, that takes time to recover from the abuse you had.

I wish you well with this,

You mention she posted photos of you on Facebook, how old are you? Were you relived because you felt free of her control?

I unfortunately still have a grandma like this and she’s a demon bitch from hell, every time I see her I’m reminded why I can’t stand old people. As a child/young teen I half seriously contemplated her having a ‘fall.’

I don't agree with those who have responded harshly.

If someone makes you uncomfortable and anxious, it's perfectly reasonable to feel relieved when that source of stress vanishes from your life.

It's nothing on the scale of what you describe, but my daughter finds her one living grandmother very annoying at times. (My wife and I do too.) She has always had a mental image of her granddaughter which is semi-detached from reality, and she continually expects her to conform to some weird ideal of what kids should be like and what they should be interested in. Since those ideas were things she absorbed during her childhood in the 1940s, they're all far from modern realities.

And, like your grandmother, she's very proud of her granddaughter. She's too technologically incompetent to have a computer or smartphone, but we know she bores everyone she knows in her village with tales of her beautiful, smart and talented granddaughter. When people reach a certain age and they realise their life is heading towards its conclusion, they can feel a need to believe that something of them will continue when they're gone. It's not unusual for parents and grandparents to see their children or grandchildren as the vessel for this.

I think one big difference between you and our daughter is that we have always made it clear that while we expect her to treat her grandmother with respect, we've also made it clear that she has the right to express her opinions and she doesn't have to go along with whatever her grandmother wants just because she is her grandmother. (One result of this is that my mother-in-law has accused my wife on numerous occasions of turning her grandchild against her.)

Maybe your grandmother was a nasty, manipulative, selfish person. Some people are like that, and grandmothers are only people. Her saying that she loved you doesn't mean much. Some people say that as part of their manipulative games; some people say it because they know they're expected to say it; some people attach a lot of strings to their affection, and it's conditional on you doing what they want.

Or maybe your grandmother just didn't know how to deal with you. Perhaps she always did her best, but you and her were such different people that you never really meshed, and something prevented her from seeing that her idea of fun was not the same as yours.

I don't think you should feel guilty about not missing your grandmother; you feel what you feel, and you have the right to those feelings. But nor do I think there's any point in carrying a grudge against your grandmother and blaming her for how you are; she was who she was, and you are who you are. You have agency over your life, and if you're not happy with how you deal with the world, then it's up to you to take responsibility for that and try to figure out how you can make your life more enjoyable.

I was relieved when my Grandmother, a flaming narcissistic bully, died. Every single one of her Grandchildren feels fear just recalling her presence as young children. After she was buried, we secretly sprinkled a bit of dirt on her grave stone so that the grass would grow over and cover it. When I see her grave marker covered with grass, I relive the relief I felt at her death.

BTW, my other grandma was a wonderful loving person. I'm very lucky to have had a 50% success rate.

What was it like when your brother, and grandmother would fight?

"I was relieved when she died"

What the fuck is wrong with you? Fucking sociopath.