Im terrified of supporting myself iin?

48% Normal
11 Comments

Im in a bad situation. I cant leave my boyfriend because i'm so dependent on him. He lives near and takes me to my job which i love working at. He helps me buy groceries. Im extremely shy and don't drive, i would be lost without him. I have no friends so no one else to help me except family but they live far away so i would feel so bad asking them to take me. Plus how do i buy food? I need help and i would be too embarrassed to tell my family im still so shy i cant buy groceries. I want to learn to drive but my boyfriend hates me right now for telling him i would rather find other people. He wont help me. He does so much for me i feel bad but its how things turned out between us. How do i begin supporting myself? I need my job but dont make enough to live alone.

Voting Results
48% Normal
Based on 48 votes (23 yes)
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Comments ( 11 )
  • whiteshirt
    11 years ago

    I'm wonder how the shy person like you has a bf? *no offence*

    I mean I know some people who has a lot of friends and confident, sometimes doesn't have bf and really independent.

    So back to your problem, first you have to overcome your shyness by changing the way you think. Hard, of course, but Thomas Alva Edison wouldn't invented light bulb if he's not try harder and many times until he success, would he?

    And I agreed with Crudhouse, make a list for being independent and what's the positive things of being independent than dependant to other person.

    You know, if you loosen up and be confident, you will get many advantages. Also you will look more sexy by that (I think confident and independent person is sexy).

    If you feeling it's late to get driver license, then you are wrong, because people should learn as much as they can even they're going older. You still young, not disabled person, so walk if you can't ask your bf to take you or get a bus, taxi or something.

    Good luck :)

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  • Crudhouse
    12 years ago

    Make a list of things that you need to do to be independent. That's the hardest part...admitting that there are that many things to do. Make a schedule where you do something that you aren't good at doing and make time for doing at least one thing a day. Don't think that you can do all of it at once because people have different types of energy reserves. Tell me how it goes...I would love an update to know whether it's getting better

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  • Redanddead
    12 years ago

    Doing things for youself is a part of loving youself and family will always be there for even if they are far away family is forever. And my older sister as a smilier problem but she keeps on going back to her boyfriend he is causes problems for his and my family

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  • joybird
    12 years ago

    Your bf is controlling you and keeping you down. All you have to do is be nice to people and make new friends. He sounds like a conrol freak who wouldn't like that either. Getting your driving licence would boost your confidence and independence which he wouldn't like.

    I don't understand why you think you'd need your family to take you to work. That's ridiculous!! You get buses and trains til you get there - what do you think our ancestors did before owning cars.

    Grow up and leave earlier!

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    • Havensprings
      12 years ago

      No he doesnt mind if i drove. I just didnt learn and now its too late.

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      • joybird
        12 years ago

        Why's it too late?

        Are you 99 yo?

        Saw a man of 80 yo going to court to get divorced yesterday - so what makes it too late.

        The Americans usually drive automatics, put it into drive and point in the direction you want to go. Being able to drive is the greatest freedom you will ever have - and he knows it!

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        • Havensprings
          12 years ago

          I mean its too late as who will help me? He wont take me to the dmv as he hates me right now.

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          • Juniper
            12 years ago

            Do you live in a bad neighbourhood?

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          • joybird
            12 years ago

            Find a taxi, a neighbour, a bus, walk it!

            We usually walk a mile in 10 minutes so just work out how far away it is and allow the time.

            My parents left me to walk 4 miles to meet a train carrying a heavy camping rucksack at 5am. A man in a van did stop a few times to offer a lift. My parents wouldn't drive me but then I get contrary and do it for myself!!

            My gran used to walk 8 miles to and from work each day, so do many children in search of water in the Third World. Throw your shoulders back and get stuck in - no more weak you!! Be strong and confident. You are young, you can do anything!!

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  • lc1988
    12 years ago

    Get some roommates.

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  • Dazzie
    12 years ago

    You need to loosen up. What are you so shy about? Try doing things by yourself. One step at a time. Begin with the little things and move on to the big ones one by one. Don't be ashamed to ask for help. You need to overcome your shyness.

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