Is he obsessed with me? why does he like me so much?

17% Normal
14 Comments

I'm a girl who met a guy from a dating app a few days ago. We went on a casual date (we're both young adults) and it was fun, we seem to hit it off really well and he kept telling me how much he enjoyed being with me and how amazing the time was he was having. The second time I saw him, he already told me he loved me (multiple times, sober). The third (and most recent) time I hung out with him he hinted at moving in, and he's being completely serious, I can tell he genuinely would want to live with me. I don't know if it's just because he's really lonely but he seems to idealise me a lot. He wants to hang out every day, he doesn't stop touching me when I see him, he almost never will just leave no matter how many times I hint at him needing to go. For example, tonight I told him dozens of times I couldn't hang out, but he had something at his house he's been needing to give me. So I told him dozens of times he just needed to drop it off. Then, When he got to my house he just tried to come in my house with a pack of beer and told me he was planning on staying the night at my place... it was awkward af because I really couldn't have him stay over so I kicked him out. He is extremely lovey, and awkwardly nervous for the wrong reasons about things he says to me (like emojis he uses). He finds any excuse, ANYTHING to stay with me longer. If I tell him I can't hang out 50x he will tell me 15 plans we could do for the night and then act like they were agreed upon. I just feel like he doesn't give me space at all, he finds everything about me very attractive and just his type. He constantly is showering me with praise and saying he doesn't know why I'm with him. It's just weird to me since we've hung out literally 3 times... He also insists on always driving me everywhere even if it's illogical or more out of the way because I drive and have a car, or tries to insist on coming to family events to meet the parents. He makes me feel so claustrophobic because I can tell he wants to be a huge core part of my life. When he says goodbye to me it takes like an hour, because he'll even (after me trying to say goodbye for like 30 mins in his car) get out of his car and walk me like 15 ft to my garage door then do the same thing all over again... I think I'm starting to hate him...

Voting Results
17% Normal
Based on 12 votes (2 yes)
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Comments ( 14 )
  • GaelicPotato
    2 years ago

    He's disrespectful, clingy, overly obsessed and a mess.

    Yeah don't talk to this man anymore.

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  • iamnotnormalukno
    2 years ago

    A dude I dated acted EXACTLY like this.
    He told me he loved me almost immdiately, tried to push out tears infront of me and forced me to look through his phone to "prove he's loyal". All kinds of weird shit. I felt bad for him and was like uhh we can be friends but not a couple, we barely know each other.. and he RAN out of the coffee shop we were in after giving me a quick hug and being like "wow I cant believe this, I had pictured my whole future with you...but I cant make you love me" AND WE HAD DATED FOR LIKE TWO WEEKS. Later he texted me and was like he totally gets it, he came on too strong blahblah and was like yes sure let's be friends and we kept hanging out because he was... hard to get rid off. Then he started bringing me roses even though he had multiple times agreed we are NOT dating and he was super jealous.
    He showered me with praise as well, insisted on giving me rides EVERYWHERE.. I guess that's what they call lovebombing. So basically get away from him. Even if he'd genuienly mean well he clearly has emotional issues and you don't wanna get involved in that shit. My dude was confusing because he'd have "moments of clarity" and act more sane but they never lasted long. Still not sure if he was a manipulative narc or just emotionally unstable.

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    • chewy
      2 years ago

      Looking through phones is what possessive people do.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      2 years ago

      It's hard dating... Lol. So weird to meet people like this right? So sorry for the struggles/pain/cringe you had to endure

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  • PurpleHoneycomb
    2 years ago

    I would recommend dropping him entirely.

    At best he just hasn't developed his social skills and doesn't realize what he's doing is unacceptable. At worst, he's purposely trying to force the interactions, possibly leading to even worse behavior.

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  • SwickDinging
    2 years ago

    Stay the fuck away from this guy. He sounds really dangerous. None of this behaviour is normal at all.

    Please look after yourself. Don't let him into your house again and don't ever get in a car with him.

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  • Cuntsiclestick
    2 years ago

    The dude sounds like a clingy train wreck. Run the other way. XD

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  • Ghostface
    2 years ago

    tell him to fuck off, he's creepy and disrespectful, completely ignoring your boundaries. unless he's autistic and can't read body language/tone trust me he knows what he's doing and obviously knows your uncomfortable but is purposely choosing to ignore that and put his own feelings above yours. he doesn't care what you think or are feeling, all he cares about is pressuring you and suffocating you enough so that you eventually just give in and date him. he sounds like an overly clingy annoying brat that needs his teeth punched in.

    don't be surprised if you do put your foot down and tell him sternly you aren't putting up with his bs any longer for him to turn hostile/aggressive and attempt to emotionally manipulate you or guilt trip you

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  • LornaMae
    2 years ago

    Poor thing, he sounds awfully desperate and lonely! I'd hate him too lol and would cut him off altogether. If he can't respect your boundaries now imagine in the future!

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  • Tommythecaty
    2 years ago

    Wall of text.

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  • olderdude-xx
    2 years ago

    OK, there is a chance that he has really fallen head over heals in love with you... and really wants to be with you.

    But, that he has not yet learned how to control things and is going way overboard.

    If you otherwise think he's an OK guy... Then you need to firmly tell him that he's coming on so strong that he's pushing you away. That things need to go slow... very slow... and if he can learn to do that... then you would be willing to date him to see if things would really work out.

    If he agrees, then work up a list of when you can be with him (leave yourself some free time for other things) and set a schedule. Explain that any overnights would require roommate (etc) approval....

    If he really cares - he will make a serious attempt to work with you on this... He will make some mistakes (we all do that); but, you should be able to exert enough control to get him to slow down again.

    If he is not willing to do that: Cut it off, and tell him why. It's OK to tell him that when he matures more and stops being so pushy that he will likely be a nice guy (but don't make promises of getting back together: You can tell him that nice guys always find a match and there are other Ladies out there waiting for him if you are not available when he grows up enough).

    I wish you the best with this,

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  • Luciel707
    2 years ago

    What the fuck that is a big no no, stay away from him !!

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  • 1WeirdGuy
    2 years ago

    If he just annoys you its not gonna work out. I think he isnt self aware enough to realize that hes coming off as needy and desperate. You probably would get used to being around him all the time though without feeling claustrophobic but I dont know the annoyingness will go away.

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  • Meowypowers
    2 years ago

    I only read the first couple sentences. If you weren't instantly feeling the same way, then haul ass sister.

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