Is it normal cliques and new users

I've actually always viewed you as pretty confident about a lot of things...and I have noticed that you seem to have increased confidence in yourself, which makes me so happy. I see you as a really positive, calm presence on this site. I wish I could be more like that.

I view myself as increasingly cynical and disinterested, snippy and apathetic. I used to care a lot more. I suppose it could change but to be honest, I'm not sure I give a flying fuck anymore.

That being said, though, I still dearly care for many people here. It saddens me that I have less time or inclination to get to know new users (made even more irritating by the fact that now I actually have more confidence to start conversations with people...). It's the other shit I'm weary of, mostly. Well...that and some new people who feel it's more fun to be intentionally horrid for their own amusement. I'm sick of seeing people I care about being driven from here because of people like this. I'm sick of potential new people being driven from here before they have a chance to make a positive contribution because of people like this.

I think I'm viewed on here as someone in a clique. Which annoys me. I'd happily talk to anyone who doesn't behave like a prick. The way I react to people interacting with me is...surprise surprise...reciprocating the way they have engaged with me.

I ranted :/ sorry. It's late and I'm in a bad mood.

Extremely pathetic, no. I see you as fairly sensitive and thoughtful.

I can somewhat understand why people feel this way, it's of course nothing to do with the behaviour of users on this site but from my experience a confidence thing.
Before I took a break from IIN I constantly found myself wanting to talk to and reply to comments of users but found myself withdrawing a little bit and just answering questions asked in the post without really interacting too much.
It's only really since I rejoined that I've almost forced myself to continue or start conversations or pm's or kik etc
For some really, really stupid reason I occasionally revert back to the shy guy who types a message, then deletes it.
As for the behaviour of IIN users I see no reason why people would feel excluded many newer users were mentioned in the favorite user page and as for charli.m I'd have to agree with anime I've always thought you were approachable, I feel many users are, it's a good community :)

Here's a little about me. Sorry in advance for sounding like a winy bitch.

I feel like I don't belong anywhere, ya know? There is something about myself that prevents me from being welcomed into ANY in-group. I don't even know what that something is; it's like my aura is barbed, or like I am completely off the radar. I am a B-2 stealth bomber among a fleet of jumbo jets.

I naturally fall in with the outsiders and am getting to the "fuck it" point. As in, fuck everyone, what is the point of their little in and out groups. I will be the Sierra group. Even here there is something about me that is simply not "in" or well liked even within a site of not normal people.

At least on IIN I get my own comment box titled with my username.

As for you. You are one of the best people on here in my opinion. I haven't had any direct contact with you, but you seem like a wonderful person an I am envious of you.

As I've stated in an earlier post-

I'm a Nigerian Prince who is in need of your help. Please give me your bank account number so I can transfer my vast fortunes into your American account. You will be handsomely rewarded and given a position in my cabinet when I reclaim my reign. TRUST ME. I would never lie. I'll also throw in a book of Nigerian stamps, an AMC Gremlin, 3 goats, and a bottle of Old Spice aftershave...

...and I like CocoaPuffs and porn.

I don't know how other people perceive me, and that bothers me a bit but not deeply. It's more like curiosity than botherment, I suppose :P

After a bit of thinking, I don't actually know if people here see me as part of a clique. If you can call anything on IIN a clique (which you can't, really, because there's nothing exclusive about the friendships here at all) I'm solidly not a part of it no matter how many comments I make or how long I've been here. I don't go in the Chat, I don't have Gold and I don't often communicate privately with other users, and those are pretty core indicators. Perhaps I used to be more obviously part of a network of IIN friends which you could misinterpret as a clique, but times change and who you want to be as part of a community you care about shifts. I don't have the social energy at the moment to put myself at the centre of attention by making well-thought out threads (even though I'm proud at the response I used to get from threads I put a lot of effort into) or long public conversations.

I think sometimes, when newer users see "clique" users banding together against a troublemaker, they may find it difficult to know who is right and who is wrong in those situations because of the way some people play the victim when they're in the wrong. They might not necessarily have the context to see why the "cool" members behave aggressively, because it's only the "cool" members who get targeted by those trolls. As a result they stay out of arguments, but might be left with the feeling that there is a "clique" which isn't friendly to "outsiders".

A lot of the people here I count as friends to me, with varying levels of closeness ranging from the fond acquaintance to the really good friend. There are other people who are hilarious and brighten my day with their vividness. There are people who I disagree with who allow me to critically engage with my own opinions.

I liked you from the start but as time has gone on, I've liked you more and more. I do understand the kind of person you are and I can't really say anything bad about it because it's the kind of person I'd want to be too.

However, you are talking to the excluded. They will always exist and sometimes there is no good reason for it. If enough hate is directed at people because of what they are, you can't magic it away.

Maybe in the future, people will gain more intelligence. :)

I took two fartwalks today

These posts smell like a DIY Craftshow host's vagina on a sunny afternoon.

Anime7,

I think I have seen you grow a lot in this site. I remember when you first started posting comments here and I am pretty sure I recognized a few of the stories you posted. Yet, I never saw you as a "needy" person; I think that even when it seemed like you were going through bad moments, you always appeared to be quite self-sufficient. Yet again, seeing how you have turned into such a caring and wise person is really encouraging; as I want to become more positive as well.

Regarding the "clique" thing. I think that some people just expected to belong to a community by signing up into this site. Which is actually something normal in other sites. But well, this site isn't really the best to form a community, and I think that is actually something positive. I also assume that some are kind of jealous that some users have formed a circle; and some others are just too shy to try to enter this circle.

I never saw anyone here unapproachable, but I just never cared enough to become friends with everyone. I take really long breaks from this site sometimes, and the fact that the anonymity here is so strong, has made me reluctant to try to befriend other users. But yet again, I think that if you post good stories and good comments, people are nice to you in general; and it is not really necessary to be BFFs with everyone to get good feedback.

it seems like some people got away from the whole advice thing and just try to be funny

helpful + funny + sensitive + kind = cute

I apologize if this is a repost, but I posted this once and something happened to it...

I'm a fairly new user, but I've been away for a few weeks. I've wanted to come back here, but I've had too much work to do.

Anime7, you were one of the first people (maybe the first user) to welcome me a couple of months ago. Some others welcomed me. If it wasn't for that hospitality, I wouldn't be here tonight. When I first came to this site, I read some very negative posts. I saw the users band together against one raving idiot, and I felt then that I would have a seat at the table. Never mind where I'm sitting, as long as I'm at the table and I have a voice.

For whatever reason, when I'm reading the posts here, I imagine what kind of co-worker you all would be. Would you be the outspoken go-getter who walks really fast and seems to stay in a bad mood, or would you be the quiet but productive worker who keeps the peace and always seems to be calm? Would you be likely to steal ideas and pretend they were your ideas or would you have so many ideas that you wouldn't mind sharing them? There's no way to really know, but there's nothing wrong with wondering. Anime7, even when I don't comment on posts, I still read your advice because you give good advice and I think you would be someone I would like to work with. Don't ever think that you're lame because I value your opinion and many other users' opinions.

Hello, Anime7. I used to feel as though there were cliques on this site, a few years back, now not so much. Admittedly, I was a little bit jealous, but now I'm not. I think part of it might have been that I was keeping a little to my own space. I think that I have been dong this a little more as of late, but I'm going to try to get out on here a bit more.

This site has sadly "lost" many of our classic users so, this site, at least to me, feels as though it has some missing components to it.

I think that it is about time that my profile were updated. :)

No qualms towards the people on this site. I feel it's a safe place to openly talk about things and most of the users like yourself are welcoming.

hey, I don't see any new users anywhere :(

I agree with all you said Anime 7 and I think your posts are well thought out and very helpful. I think everyone has had their fair share of feeling like there's an invisible IIN crowd when they first came here and it's something that wears away with time. I did at first but it really didn't stop me from speaking my mind.

idk, I go out of my way to make sure that I'm open to anyone especially in the chatroom, when I'm commenting I usually keep it classy nothing too serious (it's a potato thing).

Edit : Also I'm trying to build a time machine and I'm almost there. If anyone here knows the final steps please find a way to contact me

I only came once today and I did not wash my hands with soap.

Wait, are the new people supposed to say hi or something?? Well I suppose.. Hi! I'm Liss, and a friend told me about this site and it kind of perked my interest. So I looked it up and now I'm hooked. And I'm female (I believe it says in my profile). This is such a great community and I am glad to be a part of it :D Hopefully I make some friends. Well there you have it ;)

See, posts like this are why I think you're a cool guy

Awww, now I wanna hug you!