Is it normal for feeling like this

I had disability and three mental disorders, loss twin so I'm twinless, deafness, I had weird emotion on that same day, u can say I was depressed kid, back then I thought I have real friends and classmates that looked up to me, because I was slowest learner in class called learning disability where I have hard time in school, some problems I can't get such math, history, reading, all that stuff done, my school life was stuck in special Ed. Through high school, during growing up, I learn half in month and half month, while I was senior, I had went four types counseling, it never helped me, I always wanted save people by being cop, or go on army. Become a hero, Then my dream shatters because it didn't felt right without my twin sister, because there was Twins students like three of them, four boys, two girls, so I was jealous and angry so I congratulated high school, then couples months. I thought I had friends and friends from classmates. They never visit me, so it was anger build up everyday, I don't know I should be mad or its normal, I had lost interests in life so I got job and buy food for myself and live on my own house, my mother checks everyday see I was okay I'm not ok, bad things happen to good people who had biggest dream of wanting to be something they always wanted. So mine dream shatter so I can't do it without my twin sister. I never know if it's normal to feel anger these years.

Thanks for reading from my life experience. It was rough.