Is it normal for my 8 yo student to see me as a mother figure?
I've been teaching 8-9 year-olds for the past two years. I love my students and care about them very much. Whilst most of the other teachers are somewhat "distant", I always took the time to listen to them and laugh at their funny antics.
Last year I taught this boy who was very smart, a great sport, a really good boy all-around. Because he is smart, he was always the center of attention in class: always answered the questions and stood out.
This year he's my student again. My daughter, who's also 8, is in our class. Not long after classes started, he let me know he didn't like being in the same class as her. I thought he was just a bit jealous, after all, most students want to be the teacher's "favorite".
Then, some other time he told me he had a dream that my daughter had died. I didn't link it to our relationship at the time. Now in this class there are many smart kids and he no longer stood out as much. Another student did. It's almost inevitable that we compliment the students who dedicate and do well, and so I did.
Today he pulled me aside to tell me he had this dream that we were all at the beach except for Phill* (the boy who stand out now) who was travelling, and we were all having fun, but then Phill* came back and he felt lonely.
I talked to him and told him I love them all, that each one is special in their own way... But later on the same day he told me he has this type of dreams quite often.
Not too long ago, his mother let the school know that she and his father are splitting. I'm sure that affects him a lot, even if the parents try to make the changes as smooth as possible.
But aside from that, I also know that his mother is very busy with her job (out of town and, many times, out of the country). He lived with his grandparents during the week and only went home to his parents on the weekends.
I feel really bad, because I know it's not a void for me to fill, but at the same time I don't want to "not be there" for him when he needs me. He always comes around and hugs me, sits next to me so we can chat... All the other students do that as well, but with him I can see it's something deeper than just spending time with the teacher.