Is it normal i envy religious people?

Pray to God, and ask him to help you believe.

I see no reason why anyone would be afraid of death, unless their religion results in some sort of negative outcome for them. What are you afraid of, for example, but nothingness? Nothingness is nothing to be afraid of. Why would one fear what amounts to nothing?

What most people don't realize is that SJW types and modern liberals as a whole are very religious. It's just that their religion uses scientists instead of priests, encourages consumption of products vs internal growth, and lacks any sort of moral code.

Modern liberalism is a natural evolution of Christianity, stemming from Protestants. In any other century, these people would be the annoying types knocking at your door, eager to preach about Christ and how devout they are, showing up to church in their Sunday best, and then beating their kids and getting drunk afterwards.

Do you remember not being alive? Was that a profoundly unpleasant experience for you? Being dead feels exactly the same.

What you're talking about in your OP is normal existential dread. Well, it's normal for those who have the luxury of not being totally focused on just surviving every day. And, in societies where simple physical survival isn't a huge challenge for most people, it's normal for those who are smart enough to actually ponder the meaning of their life rather than blithely accepting whatever bullshit got shoved into their heads when they were kids.

You're right about religion providing simple, easy answers to the huge existential questions about why we exist, what the hell we're supposed to do with our lives and what happens after it ends. The reality is that religious beliefs are just fairytales dreamed up by people who found it comforting to believe that there was an intelligence controlling the world rather than it all being a bunch of random shit happening for reasons they couldn't comprehend, that death wasn't really The End and that afterwards, there would be some sort of cosmic justice doled out to the good and the wicked. If you accept that's all nonsense and you recognise that you only happen to exist due to an incredibly long string of chance events going right back to the development of the first self-replicating microorganism, then you also have to accept that it's your responsibility to figure out the meaning of your life and what you want to do with it. If you want to, you can waste every moment of your existence on obsessive fretting about how your consciousness will cease one day. It's not going to delay that day, and it's not going to alter the outcome, so it's completely pointless, but you're free to do that if you so chose. Alternatively, you can accept that you do exist at this moment, that you're mortal, and focus on connecting with the world and people around you and finding some joy in that every day. It seems to me that a very good way to get out of your own head is to make an effort to think about others, and try to make the lives of everyone you deal with at least a little more pleasant. We're all in this together, and nobody gets out alive.

https://www.healthline.com/health/existential-dread
https://www.verywellmind.com/coping-with-existential-anxiety-4163485

Do you want to be spiritual?

Here's a good prayer for you, OP.

God, grant me the willingness to be willing.

Nope, not normal.

I'm not religious but I believe in an afterlife. It makes sense to me because our bodies decompose but we are energy/a soul too, not just physical matter, and energy doesn't die. It moves elsewhere. It makes sense that we don't know everything yet and modern science isn't as perfect as science will ever get hence it can't find answers to or prove everything. Just think about everything that was considered supernatural before science was able to say it existed, like electricity for example. We can't see electricity but it's there and it works, of course that was supernatural at one point in time. It makes sense, because we can't see it. I've also had many strange happenings without logical explanations too many times to not believe in something.

I envy religious people sometimes myself, but for other reasons. There's a lot of flaws to religion though. I come closest probably to christianity in my personal values but i've never been able to actually follow christianity. Religion is a choice though, if you want to believe something you need to open your mind and talk to other people about what they believe, read some books and maybe even go to church or any other religious place you have in your close proximity. If you aren't happy in your atheism then maybe that is a sign that you do deep down believe in something, you just haven't figured out what.

If people want to be religious then so be it just so as long they do not force their beliefs onto other people.

I'm agnostic and it doesn't bother me much. Obviously I don't want to die but I don't fully believe in an afterlife and if there isn't one it's sad but I think then it's just like before we're born, we don't exist so we don't feel or know anything. It's depressing but I can't fully believe in something I don't know is true and to be honest I feel like even the strongest believers have some doubts as well. I almost feel like they sometimes have more fear than agnostics and atheists.