Is it normal i hate when people say...

88% Normal
22 Comments

Alright...So I'm a young straight* male. I've had a couple gay friends all throughout my childhood and early adulthood, and I can earnestly say that them being gay is not a choice. So I absolutely HATE it when people say being gay is a "lifestyle choice". Even if my male gay friends did marry woman, and have a baby with their wives, they'd still like guys, so they'd still be gay. It's not like you some day think..., "Hm... I think I'll try out being gay..." Straight individuals don't choose to be straight, well I know I sure in hell didn't. It comes from early childhood. I understand this may interfere with strong religious views because the Bible contradicts my belief that being gay isn't a choice, but I'm sure you all understand where I'm coming from. I mean, even if my gay friends stopped all gay relationships, and didn't become intimate towards their same genders until the day that they all died, they'd still be gay... because they like men...(Assuming the gay friends I'm talking about are all men). So...is it normal that I hate the statement, "Being gay is a lifestyle choice."?

Voting Results
88% Normal
Based on 66 votes (58 yes)
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Comments ( 22 )
  • thegypsysailor
    10 years ago

    I've noticed that it is and isn't a lifestyle choice and most gays I know well enough to discuss this with, agree with me.
    In men it most often is not a choice. They have never had an attraction to females and some aspire to be women. Some are born effeminate with less body hair and female mannerisms.
    In women it is not so cut and dried. Many (very feminine) girls dabble in being gay out of curiosity or because they have had a (some) very bad experience(s) with a man (men) and do not want a repeat, though they are still attracted to men. Their relationships with women tend to be with more masculine women, keeping the feminine role. Eventually most of these girls go on to straight relationships; the white picket fence, kids, minivan, PTA, etc.
    Other women are born more masculine than feminine, with a larger frame and more body hair than is normal (beards/mustaches), a lower voice and absolutely no attraction to males. These women usually (again a huge generality) wear their hair quite short, never have long, painted fingernails and rarely dress as women.

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    • dom180
      10 years ago

      Just because sexuality is fluid, does not mean it is a choice.

      I also find it really weird and to be honest rather crude how you stereotype homosexual people as being more masculine or feminine than heterosexual people. There's to reason to assume a relationship between physiology and attraction. I know you acknowledge you're making huge generalisations, but if you know you're generalising why say it in the first place? It comes across as more than a bit casually homophobic, really.

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      • thegypsysailor
        10 years ago

        Hog wash!

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        • robbieforgotpw
          10 years ago

          There's the word "homophobic" which is used to silence anyone who thinks differently. I think there are many who are heterophobic

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          • RomeoDeMontague
            10 years ago

            Yes since modern day its a crime to be straight and its normal to be not straight.

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    • RomeoDeMontague
      10 years ago

      Yes but anyone you say this too you will shoot you down in an instant. Since the debate is its either ALWAYS from birth or NEVER from birth. Since there is never more than one way to get to point X.

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    • robbieforgotpw
      10 years ago

      You make many valid points

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  • Terence_the_viking
    10 years ago

    What? i can't read through all the blood in my eyes.

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  • gummy_jr
    10 years ago

    I didn't choose to be a Gummy Bear :(

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    • Icame2
      10 years ago

      you were born one. I would love to be a gummy bear!

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  • Sweetbird
    9 years ago

    Why can't it be both, or one or the other?

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  • RomeoDeMontague
    10 years ago

    This made me laugh "I think ill try out being gay". XD

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  • air.goes.om
    10 years ago

    you Don't fall in love with the sex, you fall in love with the soul. if sex is the deciding factor, it is not love. (period)

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  • Varrow28
    10 years ago

    Can there be more straight men like you? Thanks man.

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  • crion
    10 years ago

    You're a straight* male? What is that, a fucking pointer?

    Anyway, it's normal. I'd say that homosexual urges are a matter of nature and/or environmental factors, but being gay is a lifestyle choice. I define gay as the gay culture, LGBT pride stuff, those annoying parades, gay bars, the stereotypes, etc. You can almost be gay without liking to have sex with other men, as demonstrated by the profoundly stupid term "metrosexual."

    Regardless, it's fine to hate it when people say that, especially when you have friends who know from personal experience that it's bullshit.

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  • dom180
    10 years ago

    Yeah. A sexual orientation is neither a "choice" nor a "lifestyle" (since "lifestyle" refers to your behaviour, not the thoughts you can't control).

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  • donosoor
    10 years ago

    It is a choice
    and also, religion was meant to be something that made everyone tolerable and equal
    instead it turned into a close minded moron hate machine

    I am ashamed by people who represent my religion

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    • Phishy
      10 years ago

      Religion was made to be something that makes everyone tolerable and equal? That's funny because the last time I checked, the Christian god was a homophobic, slave loving asshole who believed in stoning your wife if she cheated. You say you're ashamed of the people who represent your religion. You lack the intelligence to realize I, and other people with brains, are ashamed to say we have people, like you, living on this planet.

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      • donosoor
        10 years ago

        And why do you assume i'm a christian
        you are a close minded fedora wearing atheist, I assume
        you instantly start to rage if you see a theist and start feeling smart merely because your lack of belief. you fail to realize how much tolerance you lack and how you are making atheists look bad

        In ancient rome homosexuality was tolerated and was perceived as a normal thing, they were also extremely religious. what you fail to realize is that religion changes overtime and it's main message is to love and tolerate

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        • Phishy
          10 years ago

          Yeah, I assumed. It's easy to assume when the prime religion in America (which I'm also assuming you're from) is Christianity.

          And I never said I was an atheist. So you're also assuming.

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      • RomeoDeMontague
        10 years ago

        Where does Christianity say "Yay slavery"? So you are for cheating on a spouse/lover? By the way being a cheater does not make you more intelligent. It makes you an immoral prick.

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  • disthing
    10 years ago

    Yeah it is.

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