Is it normal if i feel to feel depressed to be 21 already?

84% Normal
16 Comments

I have been waiting to be 21 forever to live free and happy. And its been great in terms of that except one thing. I feel like Im not ready to be such an adult already. Like time is going too fast. I don't think Im ready to handle all the responsibilities, act like an adult, not smart enough, etc. I feel sad, depressed, lonely, stupid, etc. I don't want to keep up with my age in example, start acting like my age. Instead, I want to stop time. But since I can't, I feel like my life should be over already. I have goals but I feel like at this rate, I'm just not gonna get anywhere, I feel pressured because I'm 21 like "grow the f*ck up" and I just say "shut the f*ck up." I don't know, I have always been an unhappy child and looked forward to being 21 or around my 20s and being happy and independent. But its just not that way. Feeling the inability and kind of mentally retarded really makes me lose hope in everything. Having people not understand where you're coming from doesn't help. Having people including family exclude you and not like you as if they know who you really are really frustrates me. I don't care of you're family that doesn't mean you really know me. There's really only been two people in my life who do know me and that's my mom and my ex. But I think my ex understands me more than my mom. My mom sometimes thinks she knows me but she has no idea about her daughter. I feel like meeting with my ex and maybe that will prevent me from stepping out of this world. I will just be reminded again that there is someone out there who does understand me and I don't feel lonely. So I'm having an age crisis where I want to stop time because I am not going to force myself to act like an adult when really I am not one yet. That's just fake and it'll be temporary so it won't last. I feel emotionally and physically sick so I don't want to go to the doctor. I just want my physical pain to take over and possibly end my life. That's it.

Voting Results
84% Normal
Based on 38 votes (32 yes)
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Comments ( 16 )
  • Terence_the_viking
    10 years ago

    Depression never suited me so i threw it in the bin.

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  • shuggy-chan
    10 years ago

    Welcome to life, ur finally learning that more young adult have no idea what the fuck they are doing and just faking it

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  • moonlightshield
    9 years ago

    Hey dude or dudette xD I've just turned 21 in october this year, and i spent about 2 weeks feelings depressed because i was "feeling old" and was already feeling the quarter life crisis begin. But then i had and epiphany, that my life as an adult has just started, and i have plenty of time to figure out how this "how to be an adult" thing works for me, and that i shouldn't be freaking out over it even though it may sound like a lot of pressure sometimes. I suggest you to just take baby steps, find something that you would like to do for the rest of your life, and that something makes you feel good! Take that and gradually work on it, it can be a college course or a job, make that thing your first task as an adult(don't give yourself too many tasks to work with if you can't handle all of them). By taking baby steps,you'll accomplish those tasks without giving yourself too much stress and panic attacks, and you'll be already being an adult(a lot of people can fill your mind by saying that being an adult is being able to pay your bills,having a house of your own,buying a car with my own money, some of it yes.. But it doesn't have to be now! Christ on a stick,you're just 21! and you shouldn't be worrying like that at all! Really, just relax! You're not the only one going through the same "20's freak out crisis" :)

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  • filiasan
    10 years ago

    I've been depressed when I was 3, and this news doesn't shock most people I've told.

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  • paulywalnuts
    10 years ago

    you're a defeated person. give up

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    • Ace09
      9 years ago

      !!!!!!!

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  • lisac1919
    10 years ago

    Like someone else said on here, it is likely most adults don't feel like adults either and are stuck in this feeling like they have to pretend they've got their shit together...when most people don't. Not only that but think about all the idiots out there. Im also 21 and I had somewhat of a quarter life crisis too, but I realize that no one is perfect and just because youre at a certain age doesn't mean anything either. Everyone has their own pace that they go by. Listen to what seems natural to you, not what other think is normal for your age.

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  • Mersaphe
    10 years ago

    If it makes you feel any happier all adults and old people today were once kids at some point. They too went through existential crises and felt inadequate or depressed at times about getting older. But when they got older they realized that life just keeps going. You being older doesn't change the person you are, it just means you're older today than you were yesterday. At some point you stop trying to fight time and just accept it.

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  • cobyjack
    10 years ago

    Im having an age crisis too. Im 20 and just feel so unaccomplished and not ready to grow up and handle more things. Been feeling pretty depressed about it :/

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  • GoraIntoDesiGals
    10 years ago

    Try being 36 :(

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    • Terence_the_viking
      10 years ago

      Wow i thought you were mid to late 20's

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      • GoraIntoDesiGals
        10 years ago

        I wish

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  • Short4Words
    10 years ago

    I 100% understand. Being vulnerable for me is really hard but it becomes easier. You just have to want it. You have to want to change, don't think you can't, just want to change and it will become a bit easier. As for learning guitar, the idea is to not let little things to deter you, if it is a passion of yours don't let things get in your way. It's like if you have a project due and you keep wanting to go back toy our computer or whatever, just keep on pushing, soon the distractions disappear and you become more devoted to what you are doing in the moment. That's what I've gathered. I do hope you don't give up.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      Yeah being vulnerable is so hard for me because I don't trust anybody. I've seen people betray others and I just can't let myself fall like that.
      I just can't seem to gain the access I need to do what I want. Like I don't have the right people around me or the right environment or anything. I have to seriously learn how to gain that access.

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  • Short4Words
    10 years ago

    Wow that's quite something. I just turned 21 and it may not have been a shock to my system like 20, but I certainly am beginning to understand that it's definitely time to change. But listen to me, no one, including yourself, should expect you to change over night. Same thing with your circumstance. This is something you have to work towards. Think about the things you do that really hold you back. Things you wish you wouldn't do. For me, I started with video games but at the same time, I'm going to pick up someone I've been meaning to do for awhile; learning to play guitar. Being adult doesn't mean an end to happiness it's just the time when you start to achieve a deeper sense of it. Am I making sense?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      I am aware of my flaws which makes me even more frustrated because if you know your flaws then the next thing to do is to just fix them. But I don't. For example, I know I let my nerves take over me so I snap. I need to learn to be more patient but it is so freakin hard because of my pride. I just can't let go of my ego I can't. I don't want to look weak and have people step all over me even though I am already hurting inside. I have this thing where when I do let myself be vulnerable I later regret it so bad I just try to take everything I said back as if I was just kidding. I don't want to be an open book. SO that's one flaw of mine.
      I started learning to play guitar too and I really want to because I know it will release all of this frustration. But that leads to another flaw, lack of persistence. Just small things get in my way and I stop learning.
      So when you say to work towards those things, its like I have tried before I turned 21 but now that I am, I feel the same. I feel like I won't be an adult until I don't know at this rate, 25. When I'm 25 I'll act like a 21 year old and when I'm 29 I'll feel 25 and so on.

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