Is it normal that applicants make me anxious?

This is my first job, and I'm glad I managed to get it before the pandemic, and managed to stay in it this far. So making mistakes is a big deal to me, and something that makes me anxious since I just survived two waves of retrenchment.

Anyway.

I have the co-worker that I look up to a lot because of how patient she is with handling us when we make small mistakes at work. I tried my best to lessen the mistakes at work for her
and everyone's sake, but there are times when even I have no control over what's happening as much as I trick myself into thinking I'm in control of a situation. We work in recruitment, currently working at home due to the pandemic, but the gist of our job is that everything we do kinda depends on the applicants, but if a situation like when an applicant ends up being unresponsive before the start of an interview, it will be our fault.

I had this applicant just last night, the HR from the client was having a difficult time in reaching the applicant for a phone interview for some reason, so the HR sent my co-worker an email that they will just do a virtual interview. All that's left was to get the applicant's confirmation that they can do a virtual interview. Surprise, surprise, even I could not contact the applicant for some reason; the number is suddenly unreachable and there was no response to the texts and email I have sent.

HR has sent the invite link to the applicant.

Co-worker told me that I have to get the confirmation ASAP.

Applicant is still not responding.

I kept trying to call the applicant.

Co-worker is getting angry. How can we tell? She uses CAPS LOCK on her chats.

I was panicking.

Ended up saying that if the applicant doesn't respond, maybe we can just drop their application.

Big Mistake.

Co-worker asked if I was okay in the head, I understand now why she would ask that, because it was obvious I wasn't okay last night. I was stressing over an unresponsive applicant that I said something irresponsible. Co- worker told me that the HR went through the trouble to set up a virtual interview for the applicant, so I should make sure they attend the interview.

Applicant was still unresponsive.

I'm still trying to reach the applicant. It's already way past work hours, and yet there was still no response.

Around 30 more minutes passed, and the applicant finally responded, I asked the applicant to confirm if they received the email.

Applicant tells me that they haven't checked their email yet, even though I already texted and emailed for them to check.

Applicant tells me they will confirm it, and hangs up.

15 or 20 minutes passed, Applicant is not confirming yet.

Co-worker is asking for the confirmation.

At this point, I've gotten numb and my mind just tells me whatever happens, happens. I don't care anymore, I just want to get away from here. It might seem petty, but being in recruitment you'd know how hard it is to get a new job so I was really thinking hard if this will affect my performance and they might suddenly let me go. I was scared of inconveniencing them. They might think I'm being a burden.

After a few more minutes, the applicant finally confirmed, they received the invite link for the virtual interview and they will attend.

It was already 10PM then, working hours ends at 7PM. I'm so tired from the hassle I went through to contact this applicant. Co-worker was mad because my applicant had better be worth it because they had to adjust the entire schedule of other applicants because they couldn't contact my applicant.

I'm still worrying if this will affect the company's view on my performance, my co-worker did scold me in the work group chat so our Team Leader saw the whole thing.

Like I said, if the applicant is a flop, it's our fault.

I don't know how to get rid of this anxiety, I honestly just want to avoid applicants like that again, but we can never really know what kind of person they are behind the resume. When I woke up this morning, I couldn't focus at all, I accidentally gave dog food to my cat (Cat ate it for some reason anyway).

I'm so caught up with last night even though it seems like such a stupid thing now as I type about this. I can't avoid applicants like that, I know, I just needed to vent out and at least let someone know that I'm trying.

To those applying for a job, don't be responsive at first, then completely block us out when you already submitted your resume.

At least tell us if you're still going to proceed with the interview, whatever reason you might have, we will accept it because that's something we cannot control.

Recruitment isn't an easy job, and you're not the only applicant applying for a job. If you are prioritized to be interviewed first, congratulations. Please be responsive to your recruiter, so that you won't end up inconveniencing other applicants and ruining the entire process we are trying to maintain for other applicants.