Is it normal that attention from men makes me extremely uncomfortable?

81% Normal
7 Comments

I'm afraid of receiving attention or compliments about my looks from men. It makes me feel very put on the spot and uncomfortable.

As a young woman, during my teen years I've never considered myself very pretty, I was and still am very introverted. At age 19 I "blossomed" so to speak: I lost a lot of weight, no longer had acne, and my long curly hair was no longer unmanageable and frizzy.

I'll be sitting alone in the dining hall when it's uncrowded from time to time and I'll overhear guys talking about me from 20 feet away. They think I can't hear them, but I can, and it makes me feel embarrassed.

Not too long ago a guy I've never seen before looked at me as I was walking by his table in there and said completely seriously "you're fine." I felt frozen and didn't know what to say.

Tonight I was sitting alone again at my favorite table in an inconspicuous corner and two guys were talking about my hair. One sarcastically dared the other to come up to me and ask to rub their face in my hair, and noted "but you have to pay attention to her facial expression the most when you ask her this." I walked out of there before anything could happen.

Do other girls actually like receiving attention from men and compliments on their looks? It seems very superficial to me.

Voting Results
81% Normal
Based on 133 votes (108 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • DefinitelyNotNormal89
    12 years ago

    My instant reaction to a compliment is to get defensive or just completely ignore them, I can safely say I despise them.
    It's easy to say "take a compliment" when you're so self conscious, I think it's a confidence issue and as you have never received male attention before I suppose it's a bit of a shock to the system.
    I think we're all different, some women love them and some women would much rather not be complimented at all as it makes them feel so uncomfortable.
    You're so young, you're still becoming yourself and you will find a way to deal with the compliments so don't worry about it.

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  • Avant-Garde
    12 years ago

    Same here. I get really defensive and angry. It makes me want to punch them in the face, but if I know them personally ,then I won't react like that. I'll just be flattered.

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  • DUUUUUUDE
    12 years ago

    How, then, will you get a husband?

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  • Screenwriter94
    4 years ago

    I believe, IMHO, people who feel uncomfortable getting too much attention from someone must address their unresolved issues. It’s unfair to offend people by telling them their over-attention makes them uncomfortable. Just save the truth to spare feelings and go deep within. If people don’t confront this, they will scare away good people.

    Insecurities, vulnerabilities, low self-esteem, low self-confidence, low value and even lack of self-love are potential problems to address. Maybe if the attention came from a crush, they would welcome it.

    Think about who you may offend. It’s not always about the uncomfortable people. Many guys will not deal with this inner conflict women present. IMO, counseling may be necessary to discuss this issue. Hope people can find their peace. Not everyone judges. It’s a self value, respect and love problem to always feel this way...

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  • imlikeatherapistbutbetter22
    11 years ago

    let me say its your life it shouldnt matter what other girls like but alas i am but ananamous voice and its likely i shall never be heard but its your life not thiers live how YOU feel is right alright kid?

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  • theunkownwoman
    12 years ago

    It's the same thing with me, so I would want to say its normal. But with me its to the point of not wanting to go in places becuase I know men will be checking me out/hitting on me/talking about me to whoever their with. It's strange to even me, but I blame it on being 'socially awkward', even though I'm really not. That's just what I say to people to keep from going out to places.

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  • Dad
    12 years ago

    Geez take a compliment.

    But since you didn't exactly grow up with this, generally girls are sick and tired of hearing fox whistles and 'Oh Baby' all the time. They usually turn around and say F. Off. Lol

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