Is it normal that he wants us to be friends first?

69% Normal
13 Comments

Hi,im 25 and i met this guy at my friends wedding who is also 25. I liked him instantly,so I added him on facebook.We kept in touch online and then we went for coffee once which was a few months ago but he is still keeping in touch with me every week.I implied many times before that I like him,just a few days ago he has told me that he did ask my friend (the one who got married) regarding me&how i was when i was younger. She told him that i am very innocent,i asked as in what way? He said as in im a good girl.I said to him is that why u r acting like a brother and as who does he wanna be to me in my life? He replied: 'i think we start as friends and then will see if it leads to anything else' I said to him that theres no point to be only online friends,and he said that he has more time now and that we will catch up again. So my q to u guys is: is it a bad sign that he put me in a friendship zone? He did tell me before that he is attracted to me, but why is he calling me as a friend? I dont know why my friend called me innocent,im just a decent person,do u think my friends comments put him off? What should I do? I wish he would like to date me...

Voting Results
69% Normal
Based on 77 votes (53 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • joybird
    12 years ago

    Chill out girl!
    He's showing you respect by not putting the cart before the horse. Nor do you want to throw yourself at him coz the fun is in the chase for men!

    If he's serious about you, he will want to be friends first and not just use you for sex. It sounds like he wants a decent girl as a serious gf.

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  • aduusw
    12 years ago

    I'm a guy, and if I'm looking for something serious I prefer to start as friends... The real question is what are you looking for.. A serious relationship or just a one night stand??

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  • hokisgurl
    12 years ago

    Watch the the movie just friends. Trust me I've been in ure shoes but different circumstances you will never get him to see past the friend zone The guy I had on and off. Thing of 3 years married another girl If it's meant to be he wouldn't say let's be friends if he cared he would date you

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  • niniozo
    12 years ago

    many of the best relationships started out as friendships. give it a go. hes either a really nice guys and very respectful, or hes playing hard to get.

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  • norm
    12 years ago

    Maybe he likes you, but has some good reasons for not asking you out, like... uh... uh...

    Come to think of it, if he wanted to be with you, he would already be with you.

    Move on.

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  • TehPurpleOne
    12 years ago

    Calm down, Skippy. You're getting a little too stressed over this. Of course it's good he just wants to be friends for now. He's probably dealt with bad relationships in the past just from jumping in, or he's just not the kind of person who dives into a relationship head-first. Just be patient.

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  • BfingIToucher
    12 years ago

    I'm sorry, but now with more details he really sounds disinterested. I would move on. Doesn't sound like he is being upfront about it, but maybe he thinks he is giving good hints. It also doesn't sound like he is really even pursuing a friendship. You have plenty of time at 25 to find someone head-over-heels for you, someone whose intentions are clear. And if this guy decides he wants to be with you later, well, you can consider it then, but I certainly wouldn't wait around.

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  • caroline88
    12 years ago

    Thank u for ur last comment,the thing is i was already the one who implied we should meet up,thats when we met last time 3 months coz of my initiative as well,although we met at my friends wedding,he didnt exactly remember who i was so ive added him on fcbk first and everything,weve met only once in real life but both of us said that it was a nice evening,but since that he was always with his work and soccer, i did imply many times before that we should spend time if we want this rshp to work but he hasnt been asking me out since then,just recently he said that we should catch up soon,i said fine,let me know when u have time but he also said that we are friends,so im upset about this situation..

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  • caroline88
    12 years ago

    Thanks guys for ur opinions,but just to explain myself better: no,im not looking for one night stand, im a decent one but i am looking for a partner for serious r/shp as im not getting any younger and already turning 25 yo. I just wanted us to date& to see how we go, am sure he knows i like him,and its been more than 3 months since the last time we've met,so how is he being a gentleman by behaving like that?

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    • MyHazelLabyrinth
      12 years ago

      Hai :D

      have you ever thought that maybe he is just shy? or he hasnt been in a relationship for awhile andisnt sure how to act?

      Ok i'll admit three months is a bit of a stretch BUT the thing here is that yes he is respecting you. And it's good he wants to be friends with you because i think relationships need to have a friendship to start with. Friendship is the foundation and if you don't have that you are goona have some serious problems later on.

      But how about this, why dont you just ask him out? I mean if you're getting impatient about it, why don't you just set the ball rolling?

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  • Treez
    12 years ago

    He wants u to b openly sexy with him

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  • hokisgurl
    12 years ago

    Being in the friend zone sucks Tits. I had similar situation and. Well we've never gotten back to gether. Still the friend. I'd say move on don't chase him leave him guessing

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  • BfingIToucher
    12 years ago

    He may be "friends" with other girls right now, too, and he's keeping his options open.

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