Is it normal that i’m able to take pain medication responsibly?

I never saw how people could get addicted to them. No matter how strong they are or how many I take at once, I never feel any different afterwards nor does my pain subside.

I mean that’s kind of the point is it not? The addiction labels are a warning, not a promise. You don’t develop a dependency taking the prescribed amounts. Obviously you don’t have a very addictive personality, good for you.

I'm the same way about pain medication, benzodiazepines. I don't have an addictive personality. I'm kinda like this about smoking cigarettes, and have smoked less than a pack in the past three years.

I became addicted to hydrocodone after cutting my leg with a chainsaw. I’m glad that you all were able to take them without becoming addicted but they ruined my life. They kept upping my dose cuz the pain wouldn’t subside at the previous dose. Once the doctor wouldn’t go any higher I started buying them on the streets which became the tipping point. Because I no longer had to abide by the limit the doctor had placed on me, I could take as much as I wanted over the course of the next 10 years, I lost everything. Even ended up in prison because I lost my drivers license and kept driving so I could go get my pills. I thought they would never send me to prison for that and BOY was I wrong! I spent a total of 18 months as in inmate of the Department of Corrections.

If your interested in my story, continue reading....
I understand that I could’ve sought help sooner, but I kept telling myself that I wasn’t an addict because I was taking a prescription. Unfortunately, at the time I originally sought help, there were no clinics around me that offered treatment for opioids. I would’ve had to drive 90 miles one way, daily, for treatment and with no license, it just wasn’t an option and my insurance wouldn’t pay for in-patient rehab. Shortly after that, my wife took my daughter and left me. That’s when my addiction REALLY spiraled out of control. I began taking every and any drug I could get my hands on. Heroine, Methamphetamine, Cocaine, Fentanyl, Diludid, Morphine, OxyContins, literally anything. Because at that point, i felt I had nothing left to lose. Shortly after she left, i attempted to take my life by overdose for the first time and was hospitilized. Months passes, my ex-wife wouldn’t even let me speak to my daughter, despite being sober for weeks so I dove back into the drugs and that’s when I ended up in prison. While in prison I was placed on a drug called Suboxone and it changed my life. It blocks withdrawals from opiates and its mixed with naloxone (Narcan) so it cannot be abused or get you high or make you feel good at all. I did treatment while I was in there and really got ahold of my addiction.

After I got out of prison, the ex-wife still refused to let me see or talk to my daughter, added with trying to adjust to regular life again, I attempted to end my life by overdose the second time. My daughter is my everything; she is my reason to live. I feel she is the one thing in this world that I’ve done right. I was a stay-at-home-dad her entire life up until her mother took her away from me. So I spent every waking moment with my princess. She was and still is, A daddie’s girl. I just wanted to add that for context as to why I felt the need to end it all. When they found me I was barely breathing and by the time they got me to the hospital, they had to intubate. Shortly after they placed me on the ventilator, my heart went out of rhythm for the first time. They were able to shock it back. The current hospital I was at, could not handle the level of care I required so they called and I was to be air lifted to the nearest trauma center. It’s my understanding that as soon as they loaded me into the helicopter, my heart stopped. I was told they then had to remove me from the chopper and perform CPR for 18 min on the helipad and shock my heart 4 times to get me back. Then I was finally air lifted. I was placed on life support for a total of 7 days. While I was in the hospital, I guess they called my ex-wife because she was still listed as my emergency contact and we were still technically married, our divorce had not been finalized yet. They told her that she should bring my daughter up to see me if she wished to have her see me alive for the last time. They gave me a 15% chance of survival. She told me that she brought my daughter up to say goodbye but I don’t know if it’s true or not. But, I ended up pulling through, I’m here. My ex now understands the gravity of not allowing me to see or speak to my daughter so I do get to FaceTime her (instead of visitation due to COVID-19), my mental health is doing better as a result. I have since stopped taking Suboxone (I graduated, meaning I was slowly weaned off of it) and I am completely drug free. I do have Suboxone for breakthrough cravings, but I’ve never had to use them. If you read all the way through, thank you for taking the time and reading my story. In the end, I wish I would’ve just dealt with the pain from the accident to begin with. My life would’ve turned out completely different if I had. But I can’t look at the past, I just have to keep moving forward!

Thanks everyone! I guess this has just been on my mind lately because I’m young and when nurses or pharmacists find out I have a long-term pain med prescription they think I have a problem. It’s unfortunate that the opioid crisis has caused this to happen but I always feel like I’m doing something illegal. When I pick up my prescription, their attitude towards me changes when they see what the prescription is. When I have any inconsistencies in my prescription, I’m the one that gets painted in a bad light. For example, I got new (cheap) insurance that only covers half of prescriptions, so last month, they only filled half my medication and discarded the other half. When I asked about it, their voice got shaky like I had offended them and they basically told me to get over it and leave. At the end of the day, I’d rather deal with all that than be unable to get through the day but still, it really damages my self-esteem sometimes.

Different people react differently to a lot of different drugs.

There is clearly a significant portion of the population that fairly easily develops addictions to narcotics; and it never improves their lives (and major long term destruction often occurs).

Feel fortunate that you are not one of them.