Is it normal that i fear letting women in my life?

81% Normal
5 Comments

as much as I hate to tell people this I think I have no other choice but to do so in order to get answers I seek.

ok a little about me I'm 28 years old going to 29 and I'm currently under disability do to numerous of neurological disorders I have such as mild autism, chronic depression, anxiety disorder, hyperactivity and insomnia. in the meantime I'm currently going to school hoping to graduate and start my career to finally put an end to this life.

it wasnt so long ago that my cousin introduced me to that app Tinder and I found it pretty exciting. I been using this app for a couple of weeks and have become a little successful with it but I seriously never met any of the women I talk to on this app. I am extremely embarrassed to let any of these women in my life because I dont want them to find out the type of life I live.

I am also paranoid that maybe these women may become a threat to me in the future but I dont know where to exactly start with this one but feel free to ask me if you are curious. till then I was wondering if there is anybody else out there who is going through or has gone through what I'm going through and how exactly should I deal with this?

Voting Results
81% Normal
Based on 16 votes (13 yes)
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Comments ( 5 )
  • pineappleguineapig
    8 years ago

    Your fears are valid. As you touched on, there's a ton of stigma around being disabled, especially where invisible conditions are involved (e.g. neurological disorders), and especially for men. And, indeed, it's quite possible for a man to be victimized by a woman.

    But, it's not all bad news.
    The thing to do is take reasonable steps to protect yourself both practically and emotionally.
    For example, when you go to meet someone new, make sure someone else--a friend or other trusted person--knows where you'll be and when. This is common advice, it's what my mother taught me, and it's a good idea.
    As for the emotional side of things, please take this to heart: if someone blames, ridicules, or otherwise abuses you for being disabled, all they're doing is putting up a big red flag that says they're not worth your time. That kind of crap is a problem with them, not with you. It's actually rather convenient to have such an obvious indicator of a person's character to watch for.

    It's fundamentally normal for humans to fear letting other humans into positions of trust in their lives. You just gotta try not to worry any more than is -practical.- I know that might be very difficult, what with depression and an anxiety disorder. It's a goal to strive for as best you can and an idea to use as ammunition against any excessive worry your brain might be drawn toward.

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  • seekelp
    8 years ago

    "I dont want them to find out the type of life I live."

    Are you like a secret serial killer or something?

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    • Vergil387
      8 years ago

      no, wtf?

      but oh well I just feel embarrassed telling folks I date that I'm under disability because most people who are in disability like me always tend to get stereotyped by society. we always get labelled as lazy, parasitic losers, etc. and I find that kinda aggravating.

      but speaking of serial killer I do worry that I might one day meet a girl on Tinder that may be a serial killer or any other type of people that might be a threat to me later on if I let them win my trust

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  • Dread-pool
    8 years ago

    i'm guessing you're female because you mentioned feeling threatened by other women. i need more info to answer.( what's your gender,do you have any significant others you're worried about liking the new woman,etc...)

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    • Vergil387
      8 years ago

      not to be rude or anything but are you trying to say that women cant be a threat to us men? because if you are I got a whole book for you that will wake you up and remember what year we are in.

      anyways I'm a male, I really dont have a significant other right now but I just roam around here and there once in a while

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