Is it normal that i hide from jehovah's witnesses?

When Jehovah's Witnesses come to your door what do you do? Is it normal that I hide?

Voting Results
89% Normal
Based on 152 votes (136 yes)
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Comments ( 43 )
  • pala

    Answer the door. You can have endless fun with them. Talk with them earnestly about the health benefits of cannibalism. Or ask them how it felt to be brainwashed by a religious cult, and whether there's anything you can do to help them (bit near the knuckle this one, as it's not far from true). Or be really interested in becoming one of them, but not just a normal one, you want to be an uber one, not like that limp-wrist who cancelled Christmas, you want to cancel Easter, birthdays, and trips to the beach.

    Ask them if murder is legal in their religion because you won't join unless it is. Ask them if they've ever forgotten something. Whether they say yes or no, call them an unreliable Witness. Also ask them about their protection program. Ask their first names but never use them. Refer to them instead as rubberneck and laughing boy. If there's a third one, call him Vidal Sassoon. Ask them their address and if you can knock on their door and lecture them for an hour on something they don't believe in. Ask them into the house but tell them to take their shoes off, and clothes. Tell them you heard about a spate of robbers posing as Jehovah's Witnesses and that you're going inside to get a big knife. Ask if they can lend you some money. If they say yes, free money. If they say no, tell them you don't think their religion is very generous and ask them to comment. Start off speaking English but slowly start introducing words of your own invention until finally you're not speaking any English at all. Say goodbye to them with "Yabba Dabba Doo, janitorial candidate number five". And tell them you ought to split their nuts right off the side of their face for what they did to JFK.

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    • Faceless

      ROTFL! Next time they interrupt my night shift sleep theyre going to wish they hadnt.

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      • pala

        I've been regretting that posting very much. I've decided to make amends by becoming a Jehovah's Witness.

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    • izakthegoomba

      Lol, you have the right idea. It's even more funny to invite them in, play along for half an hour or so, let them think they're winning you over, and THEN pull out the big guns...

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  • ToxicCrayons

    I open the door and tell them I'm a satanist.

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  • One time they came by and I was having band practice with my band. I invited them in and we played some death metal for them. They never returned.

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  • Unimportant

    In general, I'm trying to avoid witnesses of all kinds.

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  • reality84

    I used to a part of that church; I later realized it was a cult. You cannot have blood transfusions or vote because it is considered wicked. I wanna live my own life that is why I left that church.

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    • izakthegoomba

      Good for you. It can be very difficult to break out of those situations, I'm glad to hear of someone who managed it. :)

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  • disthing

    I've never been visited by them. Send them my way!

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  • Avant-Garde

    I hide too!

    It scares the shit out of me when they knock on my door. I'll freeze up and then quietly go hide upstairs or in my pantry.

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  • Dirtysanchez

    Never turn them away!!!
    Politely welcome them in,then have the kids go around front and hide their sweet ass mountain bikes.
    Then look at the clock and say you gotta go to church or sumthin...

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    • Maggie143

      Mormons are the ones that ride the bikes and wear the name tags.

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  • volozi

    Answer the door naked, look at them, tell them to F off and close the door. That was funny

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  • bumblecreek

    i don't hide, i just call the police.

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    • CumAndGetIt

      I simply tell them "sure, wait right here I'll right back", then I go and finishing watching my TV. I do they same thing with telephone solicitors. After a while they'll leave you alone. I saw JW's pull up next door and they got out, 4 of them, with all their brain washinmg tools and pointed to my house two of them shook their heads NO and they all 4 got in the car and left.

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  • when they come to my house i just leave the room because i don't want to be apart of what ever they are doing or talking about they can be bugaboos coming over every day of the week if you get them started

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  • Coolkat

    Im a christian and those guys are so annoying NO I DONT WANT UR WATCH TOWER PAMPHLET!! and gfto out of my neighborhood

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  • Ilovesloths

    I fuck with them. I kinda miss em nowadays; i never see them.

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  • pretty_a

    Open the door and tell them you will go willingly...only if there is internet in hell. =D

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  • RinTin

    I hide, but one time I was at me BF's moms house by myself and they knocked on the door. I decided to open it b/c the dogs were barking and it was annoying me that they were still there making them bark. I just pretended to listen and they gave me a pamphlet and told me to read it and if they could come back to discuss it. I knew by then that I had to say something to get rid of them so I said okay b/c I wasn't going to be there when they came a knocking again.

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    • Shackleford96

      Why be two-faced about it, just tell them no thanks.

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      • RinTin

        because I'm too nice. They'd still keep talking if I said that and I can't shut the door on someone while they're talking to me.

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        • Shackleford96

          Well, some people are just naturally more assertive than others I suppose. I've never really had to deal with Jehovah's Witnesses myself, but I imagine I could get the message across if I didn't want them there.

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          • RinTin

            I can't be assertive unless I'm worked up/angry, and I never seem to get that way in the right situations. Once this lady almost drove me off the freeway in a construction zone b/c she was on her phone and I didn't even get mad or anything.

            I remember once this guy on a motorcycle on the freeway was riding my @$$ so I kept hitting the breaks to mess with him and when he'd try to get around me I'd block him haha. Maybe there's something wrong with me. XD

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            • Shackleford96

              I have mixed feelings right now...

              Your first paragraph would have made me angry. Your second paragraph makes me angry (I drive a motorcycle).

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  • Tehboss

    nope they run from me since i either ask them hard stuff or behave weirdly :D

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  • kyanviado

    I agree with pala

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  • zchristian

    I will allow them to belive what they belive but if they come to my door i will just say go away and smack the door in their face athleast i will only waste a minute of my life on it....

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  • Sweetz

    Don't open the door 0.0

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  • binxs

    I hide too!

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  • Energy

    Who? O.o

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    • Avant-Garde

      In america, there's a religion called "jehovah witnesses" and it's a cult.
      They love to come up to people homes and repeatedly knock on their doors. If you answer them, they'll ask to come in and then try to convert you. If not, they'll sometimes bash you for your beliefs.

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      • Energy

        I live in USA, and no one like that ever stopped by, lmfao sounds hilarious though! Would love to Troll those fellows.

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        • RinTin

          They are quite powerful. Relentless. EVIL!

          In a sense they are religious trolls. Harass and chase you down the street to your home. (Of course I'm exaggerating but if I see them walking down the street I turn around. haha.)

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          • Energy

            Oh, come on! They sound fun as hell!!!! To mess with heheheehe

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  • purplegirl22

    No, I don't want to convert your religion is a fraud. Thank you and have a nice day.

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  • Dot123

    Just go up and punch those Jehovah's Witnesses right in their faces. BOOM ROASTED!!!!!

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  • karmasAbich

    I was once almost one. Of course I was living with them at the time and they put me high dosages of medication and took me to quacks. I was alone and they can be very manipulative. I will never, have anything to do with such a religion. They are no longer part of my life, nor will they ever be. I'm not one to enjoy saying this but, that I 'hate' that religious group of crazy asses. I speak from personal experience and an inside view of what they really are. Yuck.

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    • Avant-Garde

      I'm glad you escaped!

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