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Whenever I'm home alone and bored i walk to the fridge and pull out my roomates jar of mayo and put it into the microwave. (Only she uses mayo, i hate it). Once its warm i take it out and shove my dick into it, basically having sex with it and when i finish i just cum in the jar, stir it up and put it back into the fridge. Is this normal?
Warm mayo is actually really dangerous...I'd suggest just jacking off into it and putting it back into the fridge.
Yeah, if mayo gets warmed up, like during a picnic for example, it becomes highly toxic. Mayo is an egg based product, and unless the eggs are irradiated before being turned into the mayo, their bacteria will sometimes transfer to the mayo. Once opened, its always best to keep mayo refrigerated, and only the warmth coming from food (if a warm sandwich) heat it. Usually within 4 or 5 minutes in most cases. but because it is eaten on the sandwich quickly its ok. Bringing it to any temperature above 72 increases the chance bacteria will grow/activate in the mayo. It won't kill you, but 4-5 days of food poisoning because of warm mayo wouldn't be fun.